** Very upset and crying **

[Poji]

I am sorry! I had lots and lots of people telling me not to do it...they have great advice, they have great ideas...and we also know the advice they are preaching...however, if it worked for us - just like that! We'd never consider/need the surgery. Reevaluate your decision and whatever you decide is best for you - go for it! Don't let anyone get in your way. "It's not their journey to understand"
Hugs and kisses - sending you best wishes!

[2 B Lean]

You got this...

[Barbp]

please don't let your friends negative opinion change how you feel. you are doing this for you and your health, not for her or anyone else. don't let negative talk change your mind. you will do great and you are going to feel great. the problem is most people don't like change. she is probably afraid that somehow your relationship will change or something. just think positive and do this for yourself. we all are here to support you in any way we can.

[Titinc]

Let me say this has been one of the best decisions i've every made. Soo happy with my sleeve. I was fearful all the way up until my time for surgery. I listened to what everyone had to say and them made my decision. Would I do it again if I had to definitely. This is a decision you and only you have to make as this is your body. Wishing you all the best...

[azladyrider]

My first thought was a smart ass one (go figure right?) but first you need a new friend (gotta agree with how someone else put it; tell her to GO KICK ROCKS)

But if it was me I would have looked at her, smiled and said ya know? Hair grows back, but ya just can't fix stupid!

I never really got the negativity from my friends, they were concerned for me having major surgery (and going to Mexico of course was always a biggie) but not judgmental. I think maybe it's because my friends knew I wouldn't take any negativity (or crap) from them and would tell them to piss up a rope. lol Now today after going from a tight size 18 to a 1 and 1 year and 7 months after surgery all of my friends just tell me how great I look. While I had never kept it a secret I also never put it out publicly exactly what I did for all to see, hinted yes but not the actual procedure. I made it more public to acquaintances on Facebook a few weeks ago to people that didn't know me when I was still heavy and I got 5 messages from guys and 6 from ladies all wanting the name of the procedure and costs and details. The biggest comment I get all the time is from people who say that I wasn't that heavy and that they always remember me skinny - until I pull up pictures on my phone and then they say oh yeah wow I never saw you that way, you were just you....

So anyway follow what YOU want and if someone can't be on board with it then oh well ADIOS AMIGO!

As for the vitamins vs the pills??? Is she kidding or just stupid? I suspect the latter. Taking vitamins is healthy, taking pills for blood pressure, cholesterol and other things is not. But for the hair loss start taking nail and hair vitamins. My hair is short and i wear a bandana (for riding the motorcycle) or a ball cap and alot of fedoras anyway since I like hats so I didn't really care if I lost some hair but my nails are another story. Don't mess with my nails, I was freaking at the thought of losing those since I have super long and natural nails for the last 40 years so I took the hair and nail supplements and I did notice that I had lost some hair when it started coming back in around my hairline. Wasn't that noticeable I guess. Another thing that someone told me to take was a pre-natal vitamin - that helps the hair and nails too

Good luck and don't let anyone have control over your emotions and if she tries to knock you down again remember what I said about not being able to fix stupid and don't be afraid to USE that line either.

Oh this will make you laugh here: I recently found out through the grapevine that some guy in our riding community was telling people that I had gotten the surgery to lose weight and be more like women he was attracted to and dated. LOL LOL OH MY GOD! (I have never even shown interest in the guy with good reason) Soooo since he is on my FB page I put a rant out there and said that I heard "someone had said that I had 3/4 of my stomach removed to turn into women he dated" and then I went on and said um let me make something perfectly clear here to this "someone" I didn't have the surgery for you I had it for me AND while I am on a roll, in order for me to turn myself into the women that you date I would also have to have had 3/4th of my brains removed and 100 percent of my morals. Hmm wonder why he didn't have anything to say back?

[Gracielane]

{{{you}}}

[Luann]

Don't let a negative "friend" put you off what you believe is best. And being 50 is no reason not to get the surgery - I am 55 now and I want the rest of whatever life I have not to be spent just getting heavier and feeling bad about myself.
My so called friend who had the surgery herself years ago - I thought she would be a support. She went ballistic on me on the pretense of being worried for me - but it really makes no sense. She chose to let herself get morbidly obese before hand, I didn't want to wait around to see how many more co-morbidities I could develop while waiting to become heavy enough for insurance to cover. Already had a 42" waist, a cholesterol of 266 (this was after 3 days of clear liquids), GERD and was dieting just to stay in the same spot - not lose weight.

The surgery is actually LESS dangerous if done at a lower weight, rather than waiting until you are morbidly obese & have all kinds of co-morbidities.

Taking this kind of a step, you see who your real friends are, and who just wants you to stay heavy for whatever reason. A real friend will want you to be healthy, happy with yourself and care more about you having a good life rather than being the fat one so they can look good in comparison.

[lil_lisa]

Nancy, I got my surgery in Nov and I was 54 at the time. They take people up to age 70, depending on your health of course, no significant heart or lung problems. I figure it will make things better for the rest of my life, however long it is. For me, I needed to lose weight not only for my health, the pain and many health problems, but also so I can get in shape to go back to work cause disability does not pay enough for us to make ends meet. And I really didn't have a life anymore stuck at home and having to use a wheelchair to get out. It only gets worse if you wait, I envy those who are still young and can do this, they will benefit from it even longer. I think it is a smart decision. It is a tool that will really help you control your eating and get yourself in a better place in life. Don't cry, they can do whatever they want with their lives, this is your decision only to make and live with if you do.

[jennyjenny2]

I couldn't have said it better luann! This is really a personal decision and one that is not easy..it took me 3 years to finally commit to it because I was petrified but now that I'm 7 wks out I realize that it was a great decision! Don't let anyone Discourage you and you really do find out who your true friends are!

[Luann]

I never really got the negativity from my friends, they were concerned for me having major surgery (and going to Mexico of course was always a biggie) but not judgmental. I think maybe it's because my friends knew I wouldn't take any negativity (or crap) from them and would tell them to piss up a rope.

LOL! There are some who could stand to be told off like that - you rock.

[LaineeK]

Hugs to you and everyone who has posted to you and me. I'm a new member and the best thing I have done is joining this group of people. I too was getting cold feet, but through the support I'm getting from these people has been wonderful. Don't let negative people talk you out of something you know is right for you. My determining factor though was the overwhelming feeling from my prayers to the Lord. I prayed for the right decision and a way of speaking to people who have went through the surgery. That's when I found this group. Love and hugs going out to you and to all my new friends.

[azladyrider]

LOL! There are some who could stand to be told off like that - you rock.

I had a friend who constantly, and I mean every flipping time I saw her, would come up and say OH ARE YOU FEELING OK (you know the kind with the over the top pity look) and it got to the point that a mutual friend of ours told her she better back off or I was going to GO off on her. Well, she's not the brightest bulb cause she didn't heed the warning. It got to the point where I was almost afraid to even run into her (almost but not quite). So we were at a wedding a few weeks later and the second she sees me there was no hello, no hug, no hi, just a comment about my weight loss. I turned around (our mutual friend saw the look om my face and just said UH OH here it comes lol) and asked her What the FU** is your obsession with my weight? Concentrate on your own and leave mine out of your god da****ed comments. Then I walked off. She ended up apologizing profusely and I was ok with that but I could have really lowered the boom and told her that her husband had contacted me asking me for the name of my surgeon and procedure cause he wanted her to go get it done lol but I didn't go that far with it.

Funny how people would never dream of saying things to our fat faces but they have no problem saying it to our skinny ones. UGH

[jennyjenny2]

Good for you! I think it comes from jealousy because sadly alot of people are envious when you lose weight and start looking great! When your heavy your not a threat to anyone so far I haven't experienced too much negativity from people..There is alot of ignorance about this surgery out there though! !!

[Janny]

thank you, feeling better now to put it all behind me and just read these great post. im not tlkg to them about it anymore,

Atta girl!!

[mia3513]

Hello I am Mia and I understand how you feel. When I thought about getting the surgery my friends and certain family members tried to talk against the surgery. My main support came from my mother, brother sister and son who knew my everyday struggles. Now that I had my surgery and its only been 3 weeks out, I have lost 19 lbs. I also no longer need to take my diabetic medicines. I realized one person I know who talked against the surgery is now acting strange around me. she does not even want to talk about my success. Who cares what people say or think, do what you feel is right and pray that all goes well.