Depression post sleeve

[lidibear]

I've had depression since childhood. I've been on medication on and off, I really don't like to be medicated. I am 11 months post sleeve and very happy with my results. Reached my dr's goal weight, yay! I am not too far from my own. Personal goal. A few months (around may) ago my depression hit super hard. Normally I can climb back out with time without any outside help. Well, other than self diagnosing and prescribing with food like I did pre-op. This time without my old BFF (food) I feel like I am drowning and no matter how hard I try to reach the surface I keep being pulled under. It takes every ounce of energy to put a happy face on for my hubby and kids. I am exhausted and in actual physical pain. To make it worse I finally worked the nerve to mention how I was feeling to my husband, who doesn't believe in depression, and he took it personal. He flipped out, said I must not be happy with him if I feel like I need to be put on medication. He mentioned how he has been supportive of me having wls because I thought this would help me. Now, before anyone goes on a rampage about me kicking my husband to the curb, I have a great husband. He grew up in a different culture that doesn't believe in depression and like mental illnesses(?). Needless to say I felt stupid for sharing how I felt and have been in tears all morning. I knew wls was not going to make my depression go away. Heck I even knew that in some aspects it would be harder since I wouldn't be able to turn to food. But I'm wondering am I alone in this? Another thing I am struggling with is that everyone around me... My husband, parents, siblings, coworkers, friends, are telling me to stop losing weight. I still have not gotten to my goal. They tell me I am starting to look unhealthy, which they didn't tell me at 332 lbs btw. And one girl actually said my head was too big for my body so I need to stop where I am or I would look like Starr Jones (her words not mine). I do have a big head but still. This is discouraging. I am losing motivation. I don't want to lose motivation.

Help, please.

[Juliebythec]

Sounds like you need to get to a support group. There are many available and just because you have lost the weight depression does not go away. There is no stigma to taking a medication to help you through this. It's a shame you husband does not understand and I wish he could be more supportive but this is something you are doing for you. Not him. Try and get some help either at a hospital, they commonly have the support groups for free or talk to your doc and get on some meds. DOn't let this tie you down. My best thoughts and wishes are with you.

[FITFORTHEKINGDOM]

Are you saved? A personal relationship with
Jesus Christ has delivered me from every sickness
And healed me of all depression. For the joy of
The LORD is my strength and HE would love to be
Yours too. Call on Jesus HE will answer!

[yankegal]

Honey, you need to speak to someone about this, I have a good friend who also has depression and has hit bottom so many times, but refuses to stay on her meds, or seek support. You don't even have to tell your family, make an appointment and go see someone, Your weight loss is wonderful and you should be so proud of yourself! Don't let others tell you what you should or shouldn't do. your weight will soon tapper off and then its just a matter of maintaining it. Your body knows when enough is enough. Keep up your nutrition during this time, make sure you get in your protein, fruits and veggies. This forum is a wonderful place for help, everyone is fighting a battle, no matter how big or small it may be. Keep your head up, keep moving forward, and never give up. Is there a place where you live that offers a support group that you might be able to join? I wish you the best and for now remember this is your journey and honey you are doing wonderful!!!! Keep that smile on your face and move forward!

[cowgirljane]

People who knew you as obese are freaked out by the change. My highest weight was 332, once I got under 200# people actually started telling me I didn't have more to lose - seriously? They aren't being mean, they just don't see us as normal sized people so we look too small to them.

Is your full body shot in your profile current?
What is your BMI/weight?
I do think we can get hung up with a number on a scale, but it sounds to me like you are healthy range and doing great, so you sorta need to learn to just smile and nod and not even tell those same people you are still trying to lose weight. just be sure you DONT get obsessed with being uberthin, because that is a whole nother set of problems.

I think you should get medical treatment for your depression and why do you even need to discuss it with your hubby? Losing a 150#+++ pounds is a life rocking event - very positive for sure but emotionally disturbing for many of us. Get the help you need, doesn't make you (or him) bad people that you don't agree on it, but it is YOUR health and YOUR body.

[cowgirljane]

People who knew you as obese are freaked out by the change. My highest weight was 332, once I got under 200# people actually started telling me I didn't have more to lose - seriously? They aren't being mean, they just don't see us as normal sized people so we look too small to them.

Is your full body shot in your profile current?
What is your BMI/weight?
I do think we can get hung up with a number on a scale, but it sounds to me like you are healthy range and doing great, so you sorta need to learn to just smile and nod and not even tell those same people you are still trying to lose weight. just be sure you DONT get obsessed with being uberthin, because that is a whole nother set of problems.

I think you should get medical treatment for your depression and why do you even need to discuss it with your hubby? Losing a 150#+++ pounds is a life rocking event - very positive for sure but emotionally disturbing for many of us. Get the help you need, doesn't make you (or him) bad people that you don't agree on it, but it is YOUR health and YOUR body.

[Matthewsiv]

I had surgery in June and although my results health wise are great .

I too am severely depressed even though I am on medication and have been for 30 years.

I also do not have any energy to do anything.

I still think of myself as a severely obese person.

I plan all day what I want to eat !

I tried to go to the gym today for the first time .

30 minutes on the treadmill and weights now I feel sick and lifeless.

Depression is real and God bless your husband as he does not have that problem.

But you need support and somebody to talk to.

Maybe exercise will help (it did not help me!).

Try listening to your favorite music or take a walk or just do something you love to do.

Enjoy your children.

The best of luck to you.

[lidibear]

Sounds like you need to get to a support group. There are many available and just because you have lost the weight depression does not go away. There is no stigma to taking a medication to help you through this. It's a shame you husband does not understand and I wish he could be more supportive but this is something you are doing for you. Not him. Try and get some help either at a hospital, they commonly have the support groups for free or talk to your doc and get on some meds. DOn't let this tie you down. My best thoughts and wishes are with you.

A support group really is something I need to look into. Thank you. Good luck on your surgery!

[lidibear]

Are you saved? A personal relationship with
Jesus Christ has delivered me from every sickness
And healed me of all depression. For the joy of
The LORD is my strength and HE would love to be
Yours too. Call on Jesus HE will answer!

I am, so far my faith and my family has always pulled me through. I think that's why I'm struggling so much right now. I keep reaching but I can't seem to grab hold... It's hard to explain. I don't stop praying and I won't stop. I just have moments of frustration I guess where I get so overwhelmed.. Thank you.

[lidibear]

Honey, you need to speak to someone about this, I have a good friend who also has depression and has hit bottom so many times, but refuses to stay on her meds, or seek support. You don't even have to tell your family, make an appointment and go see someone, Your weight loss is wonderful and you should be so proud of yourself! Don't let others tell you what you should or shouldn't do. your weight will soon tapper off and then its just a matter of maintaining it. Your body knows when enough is enough. Keep up your nutrition during this time, make sure you get in your protein, fruits and veggies. This forum is a wonderful place for help, everyone is fighting a battle, no matter how big or small it may be. Keep your head up, keep moving forward, and never give up. Is there a place where you live that offers a support group that you might be able to join? I wish you the best and for now remember this is your journey and honey you are doing wonderful!!!! Keep that smile on your face and move forward!

I am planning on joining a support group. I talked to my husband again. Actually talked/cried he listened. He agreed I needed to talk to someone. Maybe he can join to better understand depression. Thank you. The meds are hard for me. It's personal for me. Even after surgery I filled but never took any of the scripts. Don't know why. Maybe it's part of my own personal crazy. Yeah I'm special.

[lidibear]

People who knew you as obese are freaked out by the change. My highest weight was 332, once I got under 200# people actually started telling me I didn't have more to lose - seriously? They aren't being mean, they just don't see us as normal sized people so we look too small to them.

Is your full body shot in your profile current?
What is your BMI/weight?
I do think we can get hung up with a number on a scale, but it sounds to me like you are healthy range and doing great, so you sorta need to learn to just smile and nod and not even tell those same people you are still trying to lose weight. just be sure you DONT get obsessed with being uberthin, because that is a whole nother set of problems.

I think you should get medical treatment for your depression and why do you even need to discuss it with your hubby? Losing a 150#+++ pounds is a life rocking event - very positive for sure but emotionally disturbing for many of us. Get the help you need, doesn't make you (or him) bad people that you don't agree on it, but it is YOUR health and YOUR body.

I get what you're saying. Ppl actually call me skinny even though I am technically overweight. I am now 5'8 and 184lbs. My dr said my maximum weight loss would put me at 185. At about 200 I started to hear that I should stop with the weight loss. The picture was not current but. Did update it to one from yesterday. My personal goal was 165 that would still keep me at overweight and I was ok with that.

I've never been one to keep anything from my husband and didn't want to start now. I think my mistake though is that I hide my depression while being honest about needing treatment. We spoke about it more and he showed a lot more support so I guess we go from here.

Thank you.

[lidibear]

I had surgery in June and although my results health wise are great .

I too am severely depressed even though I am on medication and have been for 30 years.

I also do not have any energy to do anything.

I still think of myself as a severely obese person.

I plan all day what I want to eat !

I tried to go to the gym today for the first time .

30 minutes on the treadmill and weights now I feel sick and lifeless.

Depression is real and God bless your husband as he does not have that problem.

But you need support and somebody to talk to.

Maybe exercise will help (it did not help me!).

Try listening to your favorite music or take a walk or just do something you love to do.

Enjoy your children.

The best of luck to you.

Thank you, like you the weight loss and exercise didn't help. But I'm going to take it day by day. I also still see big ole me when i look in the mirror. pictures shock me though. I can never believe its really me. I log everything and weigh every meal. 11 months out. its not just You. good luck to you and Thank you.

[lil_lisa]

I think you look great, good job! Depression runs in families, it's in your genes so don't feel bad if you need help. Society makes it sound like a good thing but mental health is just as important as physical health. Get the help you need and don't feel bad for doing it. Lose more weight if you feel you want to, but don't let others decide for you. People always have an opinion, ugh.

[StacyD]

I am very happy that your husband is standing behind you on speaking to someone. I pray that life will become more manageable for you. If it makes you feel better come here everyday and use this site as a diary. There is always someone here to listen

[PipperMarrow]

Hi Lady, I'm sorry you are having a rough time right now. My husband doesn't believe in depression or weight loss surgery either, but I have had both. i can tell you the ONLY thing that helped me was medication. After 5 weeks I felt like a different person. Depression can be chemical which means support group, weight surgery, etc. will not help. I'm a Christian, I believed Jesus would help me, he led me right to the doctors office to get medication. There are different medications now that can help with depression and the physical pain that comes with it.

Please find a doctor or just mention it to your primary. I lost a good friend to depression a few months ago, I begged her to get medication and now she is not here. I wish I would have done more to help but I tried everything. I did not tell my husband about medication until he noticed I was doing better, then I let him know and now he is okay with it. I have you in my prayers. Big Hugs, Pip

P.s. Unless your 7 ft tall I would say 185 is not skinny and your goal sounds reasonable!