So far it's the biggest regret of my life.

[Catherine]

It gets SOOOOO much better, I can now eat pretty much anything I want, just not the amounts I want! : )

I can remember a few days in there when I felt like, "what the _____ did I do?!!!" but you are in the hardest part right now between 2-6 weeks are the toughest for most people, then the dreaded stall WILL come when your body is like, "what did you do to me?" and it holds onto the wieght you will lose nothing from between 10 days to as long as 4 weeks though most don't go beyond 3 week stalls. Then all the sudden you will lose like mad and feel so much better.

It gets better...in the meantime, sip, sip, sip, walk, walk, walk!!

Thanks ElleMarie, I am just 2 weeks post-op and I have lost a total of 12lb (which I could have done on a normal diet) and I was feeling a bit disillusioned with the whole thing - "why have I put myself through this?" - so I can now hope that I will start losing after a few weeks and will be able to eat a bit more.

[drisner]

I think we all go through the "I wish I hadn't done this" moments during the first few weeks. You get through it eventually. Your brain has to adjust to your new eating regimen.

If you feel hungry, ask yourself if you're really hungry, or craving the taste of some food you shouldn't have. Working through the head hunger is the hardest part of this. Are you on an antacid of some sort? You should be. Acid in your stomach will make you feel hungry even when you're not. Of course, avoid carbs, they make you hungry and stick to the no drink 30 minutes before & after drinking.

[Dee Leshuz]

I wish the sleeve had been available the first time I got to 183 lbs. That said, I don't like the tone on both sides of this "debate" and the fact that this person's health and well being is being MADE into a debate.

Remember how we all felt after surgery (My first night in the hosp. I was saying I wish I hadn't had the surgery to someone who wasn't a fan of me HAVING the surgery-that regret was gone by the next day.) and let's try and help this person out Barring unforseen and unusual consequences you will heal and feel better soon, I hope, and like most of us, end up loving your sleeve as one of the best investments you could have made in yourself.

[so ready]

you are in the depression of breaking up with food. I went thru it. I am almost 6 weeks out now and it gets so much better. It is very depressing when you can eat anything but soft or liquid form food. IT REALLY SUCKS!! When I went thru my first stall for 10 days last week it was ok cause I knew it would be coming. I know they will come and go but that is okay i don't have to by new close every week I can buy them once a month. It will get better I promise this is a lifestyle change and if you didn't try everything before surgery then you will have a hard time dealing with new changes you have to make. I have a great support group my family my mother had the stapling of the stomack done in the late 80's and after the shock of what and where i was going to have done she has become my biggest support person (besides Husband). If you can find a support group to go to in person and this site is a wonderful support group as well. You can do this depression just sucks all the way around it. Good luck

[JulieJ]

Wow. I sure hope that people new to this forum don't judge us all based on this thread. This makes me sad. It is supposed to be a place where we build each other up, not tear each other down.

Rigwelder is more than likly scared to death that he has ruined his/her life. He/she doesn't need to be judged over whether or not he had should have had the surgery. It is done and can't be changed. There are few of us here that have the knowledge to "outguess" or "outdiagnose" the surgeon. I know I don't.

I believe we need to show some compassion here. I have been on this forum for long enough to know that week 3 is a tough, tough week, both mentally and physically. Weight loss stalls, and depression sets in. Hopefully we can offer each other solace and comfort through these tough times. This is not only a physical journey, but a mental one. Most of us are not fat for physical reasons. We are going to have to re-adjust our thinking to be sucessful, Rigwelder included. Rigwelder is "in the process". Let's help him on his journey, shall we? Much preferable to kicking someone when they are down, in my opinion.

[melissa08015]

It gets better !!!!!!

[cowgirljane]

It does get better and what you are feeling is very normal. Your recovery actually sounds pretty typical - the first 1-2 months kinda sucks!

However, before you know it you will be losing a lot of weight, regaining your strength and looking wonderful . When you are feeling low, remind yourself WHY you did this surgery. I am sure you didn't take it up on a whim and put thought into it, you are just now going through the "emotional" part of that process.

I felt like crap too, but my resolve was very high since I felt like I was about on death's door from being so fat. Not because of co-morbidities, but just because I felt so physically awful from being so heavy - like stuffed sausage that had trouble doing the stuff I love doing! We are all coming from a different place and if you remind yourself why you decided on this surgery, you will find that resolve too and it will get better.

Hang in there!

[niamh]

Thanks ElleMarie, I am just 2 weeks post-op and I have lost a total of 12lb (which I could have done on a normal diet) and I was feeling a bit disillusioned with the whole thing - "why have I put myself through this?" - so I can now hope that I will start losing after a few weeks and will be able to eat a bit more.

Hi Catherine, I'm the same that I have lost with the same speed on diets in the past. The problem is though, I put it all back on it again (and then some). The reason for me having the sleeve was not about problems losing weight, but problems maintaining.

Also, just in relation to our previous messages about diet info - Chris Sutton actually gave me a copy of the NHS booklet from University Hopsitals of Leicester which has loads of information about the diet they recommend, did you get it? If not, I could photocopy it for you and post it, or scan it and email. Let me know if you'd like it - otherwise deffo get onto your dietitian because they definitely should have given you more written info than it sounds like you have?! The dietitian that visited me basically gave me all the same dietary information again, but just not in the NHS booklet.

[pack89]

OK, I've been reading all of these posts, and I do see both sides of the argument. On one side, gemini, I think, is trying to say that you should have done your research. The other side is saying that this is a common thing that people go through, happens to almost everybody. But to me, both sides are essentially saying the same thing, just in vastly different ways. The common thread here is, "you should have done your research!"

Whether it's the patients or the drs, I believe people are getting this surgery vastly under prepared. Too many seem surprised when it's not all sunshine and rainbows. They've never heard of stalls, they didn't know not to eat and drink at the same time, or about waiting to drink. They didn't fully understand the post-op diet with the stages of foods we are allowed. Just so many things that they seem uneducated about. I know every dr is different, every NUT is different, just as every person is different, but I've been on this forum for over a year now, and see the same questions asked over and over and over again. Asking these questions before the sleeve us understandable, but some of the ones asked after they have surgery just shock me. It's like they had NO CLUE what they were truly getting themselves into. This isn't a bad haircut or color that you can just grow out people. This is a permanent, life-changing surgery. You need to go into it EYES WIDE OPEN with as much knowledge BEFORE hand as possible!!

While I am thankful I only had the 3 month waiting period, which ended up being 8 months due to my breast cancer, I TOTALLY understand why the insurance companies want people to wait for 6 months or even a year. We think it's just to give people a chance to diet or to back out, but now I think it's to give people time to REALLY KNOW what they getting themselves into.

At my 3 weeks, did I miss food? Sure as hell I did! Sitting and watching my family eat pizza while I drank a shake sucked. But guess what! I KNEW that would happen. How? Because I read about others going through the same thing. Did I have a stall at about 2-3 weeks? Yes and that sucked too, but I KNEW it was coming and that it would pass. Does everybody lose 20-30# a months? Nope, not me. Yep, you guessed it, it sucks too, but I am OK with that because I KNOW that everybody loses at their own pace. I'm going to lose slower than someone who has more weight to lose. I'm going to lose slower than someone who exercises every day, or someone who is really strict about their carbs. THAT IS ALL OK BECAUSE I KNEW THAT'S HOW IT WOULD BE.

Please all yet-to-be-sleeved and newly sleeved, read, read, and read some more. Do all of the research you can about this new journey you are undertaking. It's not for the faint of heart, but it is so very worth it. There is such a wealth on information on this site and others, it's just about the wanting to to do the work to find it. Go into this fully prepared, because once it's done, there's no going back.

[niamh]

Peggy, while I kind of get your point, I certainly don't think any of my previous response should read as 'you should have done your research because your reactions are normal'. I think it's inaccurate to say that the reason people have regret is because they didn't go in with their eyes open. Sometimes people can hear and know something intellectually, but you can't emotionally know or experience something until it hits. That's like saying you shouldn't experience sadness/grief when a loved one dies, because we all know what death is about. Grace made an excellent point in talking about this as a grief reaction. I've had things happen in my life where I've not reacted the way I would have predicted - both expected and unexpected things. Sometimes I positively surprise myself, and sometimes I'm surprised where I have stumbled.

As it happens, I haven't experienced any buyer's remorse in relation to the surgery, and maybe that's because I did something useful during prep time, but maybe I'm just lucky. I'm humble enough to think it's at least in good part due to luck.

To me, any emotional reaction is acceptable, same as in any grief reaction. How we deal with them is the issue at hand. Coming and posting openly and honestly about fears or regrets on a forum and asking for reassurance seems like a pretty reasonable coping mechanism to me. I'm just sorry the thread has derailed to judging the person in relation to their approach either before or after the surgery. If I was the original poster, I'd be having serious second thoughts about posting again.

[cycleoldlady]

We all know you get big fat people and wee fat people, but we all need help and support. This forum is for that reason, not to make nasty remarks about folk judged on their age or anything else. We are to help each other, not bitch.

[pack89]

Peggy, while I kind of get your point, I certainly don't think any of my previous response should read as 'you should have done your research because your reactions are normal'. I think it's inaccurate to say that the reason people have regret is because they didn't go in with their eyes open. Sometimes people can hear and know something intellectually, but you can't emotionally know or experience something until it hits. That's like saying you shouldn't experience sadness/grief when a loved one dies, because we all know what death is about. Grace made an excellent point in talking about this as a grief reaction. I've had things happen in my life where I've not reacted the way I would have predicted - both expected and unexpected things. Sometimes I positively surprise myself, and sometimes I'm surprised where I have stumbled.

As it happens, I haven't experienced any buyer's remorse in relation to the surgery, and maybe that's because I did something useful during prep time, but maybe I'm just lucky. I'm humble enough to think it's at least in good part due to luck.

To me, any emotional reaction is acceptable, same as in any grief reaction. How we deal with them is the issue at hand. Coming and posting openly and honestly about fears or regrets on a forum and asking for reassurance seems like a pretty reasonable coping mechanism to me. I'm just sorry the thread has derailed to judging the person in relation to their approach either before or after the surgery. If I was the original poster, I'd be having serious second thoughts about posting again.

I understand what you are saying. No one knows how they will react to something until they go through it themselves. My point is... by reading and researching, they may have known a reaction like this was possible. To grieve food. They might not have known to what extent, but that by feeling this way, that yes, there are others that have felt the same way. That others have gone through something similar and came out the other side. From what I read, it was like they had no idea they could feel this way. Yes everyone reactions are different, everyone has their own addictions or struggles with food, I agree with all of that. My point is that they are definitely not the first to have these struggles, and certainly won't be the last, but by doing some research, they might have been better prepared for when it did happen, to know that it can and does happen.

I certainly feel bad for her/him, to question a very big decision made, to feel bad for having surgery. This is definitely a place to come for support, I've received my fair share. But I still believe people should know what they are getting themselves into, to know the risks, both physically and emotionally. It isn't easy. Not everyone has great success, some people have problems, and there's a whole gambit of things that can happen with any surgery. You just have to decide for yourself if it's worth it or not. You have to be willing to go through the rain for there to be a rainbow.

[mariposa]

Wow what a thread. I thought this forum was to give and get support? I have found it quite useful. I am one week out and down 45 lbs. 34 of that being from diet and exercise before surgery. Anybody can lose weight if they want to, but the probability of keeping it off we all know is slim. Whether you are 50 lbs overweight of 300 lbs overweight we were all given the same tool. Lets help each other learn how to use the tool to its fullest capacity. Best of luck to you all!!!

[NancyN]

If my response was insensitive to rigwelder, I'm sorry. I know nothing about his/her situation other than what was in that original post. Given what was said, and what seems to be most everyones experience with insurance guidelines and surgeons requirements as far as BMI/weight go, I guess I am just concerned about the surgeon. I think most have had the experience of pretty informative drs., nutrisionists, psycs, etc. That doesn't mean there aren't drs just doing life altering surgery just because you ask for it. I'm not putting rigwelder down for having surgery, just concerned there is a dr doing this without preparing patients properly.

[Mini me]

Scooter that was so well said! That is exactly how it is, it's more of a social thing when you go out, *eat along with the rest* but the feeling of accomplishment when you walk out is amazing, no longer do you walk out thinking, oh no I will have to weigh in next week at WW or bloody hell, how much excersise will I have to do to work this off. Or even worse, resigning to the fact that you are fat, and will remain fat! That is all now in the past, thankfully!