Confused

[cheleJ]

Just got my surgery date 03/26/12, problem is my son who is 16 doesn't want me to have the surgery. My husband and daughter have also made comments that I don't need the surgery but they will support me in my decision. I am now so confused about getting the surgery or not. I guess i'm just getting pre surgery jitters. Did anyone else go thru this?

[Cloud Lady]

If I thought I could have lost the weight on my own, I would have. This is a very drastic change. I was desperate and on all kinds of medicine, c-pap and oxygen. When I found out I was pre-diabetic I had to do something drastic out of desperation. I did a lot of research and it was the right decision for me. Only you can decide what is right for you. The peeps on this site will support you if you choose to go through with it. It has changed many lives, most for the better. It saved mine. Good luck to you.

[Jackie W]

My family was the same way.. However you do have to make that decision for you and the well being of you. I took my son who was 17 with me to the seminar that the physician gave. After seeing some of the ladies that already had the procedure done he was relieved and excited for me..Good Luck with what ever you decide to do..

[Bobbie]

CheleJ, I completely understand where you are coming from, my husband has become a great supporter but it took him going to the seminar, some of pre-op appts & talking to a friend of his that had RNY, with complications who said he would do it all over again, even if he knew he would have the same problems.

Now my 20 yo daughter was like your son, she didn't think I needed surgery & was completely against it. I tried talking to her about but she didn't want to, she also went to a support meeting with me, talked to one of the drs & a couple wt loss people but was still against it. She let me know very clearly a couple nights before my surgery how against it she was, saying she wasn't going to come see us the night before I had surgery @ our hotel & she wouldn't be seeing me @ the hospital either. Yes, I was crushed & upset but knew I still had to do this for me & I was going forward with or without her support. Long story short, I did see her the night before my surgery & she did come see me in the hospital. Our relationship didn't suffer & no we don't talk about it a lot, but she can see how much better & happier I feel. Like a lot of people said, they think she was scared about me having surgery.

You need to decide for yourself & support is important but if you really feel this surgery is for you, then don't let others influence your decision. It took me over 6 months to decide to have the surgery, praying & doing a lot of research, but once I did decide no one was going to change my mind! I went into surgery that day feeling very calm.

Good luck in your decission. Remember we are here to support you what ever you decide.

[Rosco]

I think what your family is doing is normal. Mine has been the same way. My best friend doesnt want me to do the surgery. My family was all real excited at first but as we get closer I think they are nervous and are afraid of complications. Just keep your eye on the prize....remember it's a life changeing choies and it's not going to be easy, however the alternitive is not an option. You will do great and once the results start showing they will feel better. You have alot of support here if you need to vent or advise we are here.

[LindaJ]

I am sure everyone has gone through their family's concerns and hesitancy for you to have surgery of any kind. I totally agree with Jackie and Cloud Lady, this is your decision, and hopefully you have made a very informed decision. I just recommend you make sure you family understands the reasons you have made this decision, and realistically understand how this can improve your life. Just like you had to gather all the facts, so must they in order to be comfortable with your decision. Especially your 16 year old. I am sure it is easy for your husband to understand the risk of not getting the weight off, your son however, may not realize the danger to your health. Good luck, remember they love you and just want what is best for you.

[BraelynsGrammy]

My 21 year old son didn't approve of me having surgery either. He said that as long as I take my pills why would I need surgery. He thought I was healthy! I tried to explain it to him and finally just gave up. Here just a month ago he told me that he was mostly upset because he thought I wouldn't be able to cook any meals after surgery. He loves my cooking and he thought that since I couldn't eat much that I wouldn't cook anymore. Boy was he wrong!!!! I cook more now that I ever did. Mainly because I am cooking more healthy and it doesn't do me any good to pay to go out to eat. He is ok with my surgery now. He knows that the only thing I'm changing is me getting healthy for my grandchildren and my life.

My 17 year old wasn't really happy but he did tell me that if that's what I needed to do to live longer than he was right beside me. Of course my hubby was beside me the whole way and still is!!

[Linda p]

My family was the same why. It took me 4 years before I decided to do the surgery. Within those 4 years, I tried every diet I could find. I would lose 20 - 25 lbs. and would regain the weight. Now that I have lost 72lbs, everyone is on board. I had to do what was best for me.

[dianna mann]

hi I am scheduled for May 29th but have been toying with this since 2008 by losing and gaining and I have come to realize this is a disease and I am going to work on getting the weight off with this tool given to me. I too have felt the up and down rollar coaster ride and my husband thinks I am nuts to do it but I feel I am doing the right thing. You need to just look at yourself and see a new you and realize we have a disease which is something we need to address. Good Luck on making it the right decision for you.

[denisejuicyfriut]

hi reading your log it could be me as my daughter was the same although all the rest are ok but scared to i think it will help them reading all these helpful stuff on here it will answer there questions too i was in a 22/24 bottom and now in a 18 feels great not had surgery yet but people keep saying i don't need it and why but i have got sleep ap i wear the cpap machine at nite my breathing stopped 133 times an hour during sleep so this worried me also other problems sugars i feel this site is helping me through my anti thoughts hope this helps I'm still a 22 on top

[Munchkin]

I think most of us have the jitter. I was also pre-diabetic before surgery. A1C was 5.9. A1C two months after post op is 5.1. And don't need BP meds anymore.

The chance of keeping a 100lbs off through diet and exercise is about 5%. That is why I chose the surgery.