I woke up today with the need to get up and make my children their lunches it's been difficult having them do their own things that I understand their teenagers but they've always depended on mom to do their thing as I stand there with my hand over my stomach they know that if they do it I'm going to get incredibly cranky so they just stand there and let me. After they leave I feel incredibly guilty for not asking for help and I don't exactly know how to overcome that. So I take a nap I wake up and I am a puddle of tears I am so emotional and I think that its just all of the medications wearing off and having to ask for help when I never had to ask for help before and not using food as a vice anymore because I no longer can and the changes in my life and the list goes on and on so how is everyone else dealing with the constants up and down their moods I've been on celexa and just got the OK to start taking it again I'm hoping that helps. Any advice?

teenagers? they should be more than responsible enough to make their own lunches, and unfortunately because you've babied them for this long, they will never recognize when to be responsible for themselves and know when to take the unnecessary burden off of you. I think your issue is bigger than the advice you will find here.
good luck!

ps- hang in there!

I think I hit depression today too. I don't know why but everything I have looked at has made me tear up.
I have been where you are to some extent. I think women/moms set such high standards for themselves that when we cant meet them we feel we have failed. Since you asked my advice.
1) Stop beating yourself up.
2) talk to a doctor maybe there is a medication that can help with depression short time
3) Give yourself permission to start letting go. Give those teenagers chores you do not have to do it all. Even if you tell yourself that.
4) set goals for yourself. What makes you happy. What do you want to do/learn/go/try. Moms as our kids are teenagers we loose our identity and it is time we choose an new one. Join a club (there is one for any desire)
5) When you are depressed don't take a nap. Do something, anything. Get out of your house.
6) When you feel that everyone is dependent on you then you can start to feel resentful and when you become resentful especially against your family you either make them feel bad or you make yourself feel even worse.
7) If nothing else think about your kids. They do not like to see your suffer so when you are doing something for them and they know you aren't 100% then they feel guilty. Kids like to help out sometimes it takes a few tries for them to realize they like it.

I hope you have a doctor, friend, mom, or someone in your life you can talk too
Good luck

PS I am in Tacoma

I felt the same way at that point!! I am now two weeks out and feel 100% better not sooo depressed and can do much more. Hang in there I promise it's going to get better.

Buck up guys!!!! You are NOT alone!!!! We ALL went through that at that time!!!! When your able to get in the Gym....you CAN work off that depression and get those endorphins pumping. I promise you will feel better. When your clothes start to fit better you will feel better. Right now you are in mourning...you are morning the perceived loss of your best friend....overindulgence in food. It took a HUGE step to admit that we had a problem. It took a HUGE step to admit that we are ADDICTS. we WERE addicted to food and to a lifestyle of OVERINDULGENCE.

Well that has ALL changed!!! We are over comers!!! We will be the embodiment on the outside of of how our hearts and spirits are on the inside!!

We have the support of thousands here and the Grace of God to get us through!!

Dear JLogan,

I have a question for you. How long have you suffered from depression? Does it seem worse since having had your WLS?

Here is why I ask...

About a year before my brother committed suicide (in 1990), I started having panic attacks. I wasn't so much depressed just panicky. I sought help at that time and after trying a few different meds, I found that Paxil helped. I started taking 20 mg of Paxil nightly and it helped tremendously, so much so that I have never had another panic attack (knock on wood). Right before I had my WLS on May 8th, my PCP decided that I should drop to 10 mg of Paxil. I was scared to do so, but I agreed. When I came home from the hospital on May 12th, that week following, I was an emotional mess. I cried at the drop of a hat, I didn't want to be left alone (I wasn't panicky, just very emotional). I didn't know if it was the drop in the dosage or what, so at my one week follow up appointment with my surgeon, my husband mentioned my emotional instability. The surgeon said that this is quite normal and should subside shortly and it has. It says it has to do with hormonal changes, the realization that food is not my friend (at least the way I used it). I can't comment about your children (as I don't have any) but your focus may be on them like mine was on not wanting to be left alone and wanting my husband by my side at all times.

If this doesn't let up in a week or so, please call your WLS and explain what is going on. I wish we lived closer, I'd come get you and we'd go to the mall or talk a walk. Hugs!