Many of us had our procedures done by different surgeons, and therefore have different pre- and post-op instructions. I'm roughly one month post surgery (it's important to note that I had an endoscopic procedure, not laparoscopic or bypass), and i thought I'd offer my meager input thus far...

First off, I'm lactose intolerant, a fact I just discovered a week after my surgery. Prior to that realization, I had been using EAS Whey Protein, which (to me), tastes like chocolate spackle. I quit drinking that and tried any number of substitutes, all of which contained lactose. Basically, if it had "high protein, low carb" on the label, I tried it and trust me, you did NOT want to be downwind of me. Eventually, I figured out the problem and was able to make changes.

What DOES work for me? ISOPURE Protein Drinks. They are similar to Gatorade, not shakes (which I was totally sick of). I bought one bottle of the pineapple, orange, banana flavor at GNC and I'm hooked. I'll note two disadvantages to it before providing the positives:

1. It does have a somewhat unpleasant aftertaste. Not too nasty, just...similar to the aftertaste you get with aspartame. It doesn't hang out long, maybe 30 seconds or so.

2. It's not cheap. At $3.99 per bottle, you may want to try one and THEN buy a case (Walmart and Amazon both carry it, and LuckyVitamin.com has single bottles in several flavors that they will ship to you for $4.08 per bottle, plus shipping).

And now the good news:

1. It's not a shake.

2. It has 40 grams of protein in one bottle that is 20oz. large and perfect for sipping through the day.

3. It contains no lactose, gluten or aspartame (they use sucralose).

4. It's not a shake.

5. It's portable for those times you don't have a blender or shaker cup handy.

And did I mention that IT'S NOT A SHAKE?

But just to be fair, the post-surgery shakes that I DO enjoy are Optimum Nutrition (ON) Gold Standard Whey Protein Isolates (24g of protein per serving). I’ve tried both the strawberry and the double chocolate, blended with ice and almond milk and they taste great. Even better, you can find it more easily and you can purchase 1lb bags to try it out before purchasing a big tub.

I should add that I don't work for any of these companies and couldn't care less if they make money or not. Just sayin'

Now, onto the How and When:

I found that it was really hard for me to "sip slowly" or "eat slowly"...I grew up in a family of four kids: If you didn't eat fast, you didn't eat at all. Learning to slow down has been a challenge, but heres what I do:

1. I portion my 1/4 cup of protein and sit my fat butt on the sofa.

2. I turn on a rerun of Law & Order (this part is crucial).

3.I take a bite when the show begins, and then at the beginning of every commercial break. My portion should last me about halfway through the show.

4. I then get OFF my fat ass and grab my 1/4 cup carb/starch portion and repeat the same process during a second episode of Law & Order.

5. Then I watch an episode without ANY food or water.

6. Once that second episode is finished, I get up off my fat ass, grab a glass of water and repeat the same process throughout the third episode (though I might take a sip a slight bit more often).

7. Once the third episode is complete, I'm done.

I repeat this process with each meal, and it seems to work. Why? Because I'm distracted by Benjamin Bratt and Jeremy Sisto. It's hard to eat when you're drooling.

Note: It's also great when listening to music...take a bite or a sip every time a song starts. This process may work for me, but remember that I'M NOT YOUR DOCTOR OR YOUR MOTHER, so WTF do I know??

The most important part of all of this is to remember WHY you're doing this: It's so you can run faster when you're chasing Benjamin Bratt. Just sayin'.