My intro! dun dun DUN! =)

[Skullster]

[I copied and pasted most of this out of my bio!]

Hello, my name is Skully. I'm 27 and in Kansas City, MO. I will probably have to self pay for the surgery. I'm not sure how I'll do it, but I guess the question is, which is worse: the debt, or my health slipping away?

I've come here to learn about and talk to other people who have gone through the gastric sleeve surgery, as well as others who haven't had it yet but are researching this for themselves. I've been doing some research on WLS and think gastric sleeve is the right choice for me.

I've battled my weight on and off since I was a child. I've had problems with anorexia on and off since around 7th-8th grades. Let's just say, food and I have a horrible relationship. I'm now coming to terms with the fact that I now have an addiction to food. I didn't want to think of it that way before, I refused to admit it, but it's true. And I need and want help. But I've gotten to the point where I realize that, I don't think I can do this on my own anymore. Believe me, I still fight myself when thinking about WLS. I've always thought it was sort of "giving up" and made you a failure of some sort. So part of me hates myself that I've gotten to this point, and part of me does feel like a failure. I have friends who are helping me realize that there's nothing wrong with needing help, admitting it, and getting it, but part of me just feels like I've failed. In a huge way. I'm about to start crying again writing this...

I have obesity on both sides of my family (mainly my father's), heart disease, diabetes, high cholesterol and triglycerides, high blood pressure and a variety of other illnesses related to weight on both sides of my family. I have my own plethora of weight-related illnesses, including several but not all of those, plus more. This is ridiculous! I'm 27! I can't keep going on like this. I need to break this cycle now because I'm killing myself every day and I'm so tired of it. I've tried different diets, sometimes even losing a significant amount of weight, only to gain it back, plus more. I need permanent help. With my weight-related illnesses, my life is literally in jeopardy. And I'm not even 30 yet!

I'm ready. I just need help. I can't do this alone anymore.

I apologize for this sounding depressing, but this is where I am at right now. I swear I'm not always like this. I really look forward to talking to others who have had the gastric sleeve, to help me figure out if this is indeed the right choice. Thank you!

[mi_mariposa]

Welcome aboard!! lots of great info on here, look around, make yourself comfy!! It's been my best decisions!!

[buddyd11]

I hope you can find what is right for you.. I cant comment on financing because I dont know your status but I can tell you this, I wish I hadnt waited so long to have my surgery. If I woulda known how succesfull this was going to be I would have financed to have it done long ago.. Good luck to you and keep your chin up.

[Skullster]

@mi_mariposa- Thank you! I've already been greeted by someone else in my area who has found a comment I made, and I'm already feeling more comfy here!

@budyd11- Thank you. =) I've decided to go ahead and schedule appointments with different surgeons around here and just talk to them, get a consult, see what they have to say. Hopefully from there, I can see about financing. I have NO idea what I'm going to do, if I have to self pay, but I will figure it out when that time gets here. Right now, I'm still researching. Thank you for sharing that with me, I'm tired of living life on stand by and passively. Passively is how I got in this place. I need to take control over my life and my health now, before it gets even worse.

[Shugaplum]

well, you are in good caring hands on this board! Just about every scenario is represented on here. I too am a self pay, and I'd having my surg in a few days. To say I have had a love hate relationship with food my whole life is an understatement! I am gearing up the biggest change of my life...and this board helps so much in dealing with that! Everyone couldn't be nicer. Welcome.

[Skullster]

@Shugaplum- Thank you for the welcome! =) We're fighting for our lives here, and that is the TRUTH. I'm so thankful there are resources like this!!! Everyone has been so great so far! I'm happy and excited for you and your surgery!

[MoreFitDiane]

The surgery is not the solution to your addiction with food; it is only a tool to help you manage that addiction. You're not a "failure" if you go out and purchase the tools you need to get a project done and keep it well-tuned; you will be a success! Every day, every meal, EVERY bite, you will still be responsible for what you put in your mouth, for how you take care of your body. When you give yourself the gift of this surgery, this power tool, you have a responsibility to use it properly. We all have to become control freaks about our nutrition. You need to decide if you can become a control freak, every bite, every snack, every meal, EVERY day for the rest of your life. There are always going to be choices to be made, portions to be controlled, and celebrations to navigate your way through with healthier choices and smaller portions. You will never again be permitted to binge or eat unconsciously. So, it's a whole lot more than just deciding to have the surgery; it's committing yourself to a whole new lifestyle. It's like getting married...some days will be easier than others, but you have to work at it every day in order to be successful. So you're not a coward; you're a brave person empowering yourself with what is necessary to take control of your health. Best of luck to you!

[carolynodien]

[QUOTE=MoreFitDiane;64678]The surgery is not the solution to your addiction with food; it is only a tool to help you manage that addiction.

Diane is right...it's a tool, not magic! BUT that tool has removed my compulsion to overeat, and for that I am just SO GRATEFUL!!!! I can say no now. I choose to FUEL my body rather than stuff it with bad food. Something changed in me the day I was sleeved...and I could not be happier! I too thought I was some kind of "failure", having to resort to SURGERY to stop my addiction?!! No, we are NOT failures, we are courageous and smart because the way our bodies work, we would continue to diet, exercise, lose weight, gain it all back and more...over and over...like I have for the past 30 years.

[mommyducky]

Hi Skully. Welcome. It sounds like we have much in common. I am also 27 and have struggled with my weight my whole life. I have a family history of obesity and weight related illnesses like diabetes, high blood pressure and other things on both sides of my family. Although I personally do not suffer from any of these yet, I know that if I continue down this path I will eventually get sick. My mother, who was sleeved two years ago, suffered from all those things and is now completely healthy after losing about 100lbs from the sleeve. She is so happy with it that I decided to do some research on it for myself. After awhile, I decided that the sleeve was the best idea for me! I got sleeved on Monday, oct 31st and I am so happy that I did! I feel great and even though it's only been a few days, I'm already 14lbs less than I was a week before the surgery. My first official weigh in will be in another week and a half and I will be under 200lbs for the first time in a long time! I so excited to be at the beginning of this wonderful journey and I'm glad I didn't wait. I highly recommend the sleeve to anyone who is suffering as I was. It's a wonderful tool to help you get healthy and happy! I'd be happy to help if you have any questions at all about the surgery either from me who is just starting out or my mother who is two years post-op and maintaining! Between us, we have a ton of information to share! Also this is a great group of people and I'm sure you will find a lot of answers and support here. Good luck to you!

~Lee

[Lynda]

Welcome Skully. This is a great decision that you are making, and the right one. I wish that I had known about this earlier, I am hoping to be sleeved early in new year. I already have diabetes and high blood pressure, and if I keep on the track I am on now will end up with cardiac issues too. So yes this is a good decision, good on you for making it. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you. You are already a success for choosing this path, and will have many successes in the future too. Cheers from Australia.

[sally321]

Hi there. you dont need to apologise for being depressed, we have all been there..... if we hadnt we wouldnt be here talking about it. People who have this op done should be very proud of themselves, having this op isnt and easy decision and you have to be very brave to take that step and actually do it.
Please dont ever think you are "giving up" or you are a "failure" if you have this procedure done because I can tell you now that it is not easy. you have to watch what you eat probably even more after the op then what you had to before the op. If you think its a quick fix its not... it takes dedication and not a month or two's dedication it takes a lifelong dedication. Its a tool to help you but it cannot make you lose the weight all by itself. I am 5 months post op and Ive lost 86 pounds. yay me!!! It wasnt easy and I am still experiencing new things everyday. I have really really had some problems since I had my op and the vomitting has been terrible but nothing feels as good as when I walk into a store and actually have to ask for a smaller size because what I tried on was to big!!! I am so happy I had my sleeve and I would do it again in a heart beat!!!

[Skullster]

@MoreFitDiane- Thank you for responding! I've been doing a lot of reading, and yes, I realize that it's just a tool. One of many tools that I will be using, along with therapy and a support group, not to mention places like this, a nutritionist and other resources as well. Or at least, the support group(s) and therapy are additional plans of mine, that will most definitely help out! I've never thought it was a quick fix, and a problem-solver. And I know that I am the one who is going to be controlling if I succeed with this change in my life, or if I will go down a very unhealthy road again. It's my responsibility to take care of myself, my responsibility to do what I know I need to, no one else can make my choices for me. And every bite, every type of food, every moment I could be exercising (and will be!), they are all my choices. I appreciate your support! =)

@carolynodien- Thank you! I appreciate the kind words, and I'm glad I'm not the only one who has felt this way!

@mommyducky- Oh wow, we do have similar stories! My mom is overweight and has a lot of weight-related health problems, as well! That's one thing that I'm a little worried about. We both have such bad habits, I need to make sure I don't let her sway me into making poor choices again, after I get the surgery (if I am approved and decide to definitely get it). I needed to move back in with her for financial reasons, and we'll be living together for at least another year. I'm thinking that once I find a support group, I'm going to make her come with me to meetings. We need to do this together. I don't want to lose her due to her weight-related health problems, and I'm sure she doesn't want to lose me, either. I'm so glad your mom is doing so well two years after her surgery! And I'm happy for you having your sleeve done! I need to rush off of here soon, but I definitely would like to talk to you more! =)

@Lynda- Cheers from the States! =) Thank you for your words of encouragement! It really means a lot to me. I'm glad you're working to change your life around, too! It really helps having so many supportive people around, even if it's just in a forum like this (and a few other places I've joined)!

I just want to say that I'm happy for all of you, those who have had the sleeve and have been able to change your life around, and those who, like me, are still at the beginning, and those awaiting to get theirs done! =)

[mommyducky]

@mommyducky- Oh wow, we do have similar stories! My mom is overweight and has a lot of weight-related health problems, as well! That's one thing that I'm a little worried about. We both have such bad habits, I need to make sure I don't let her sway me into making poor choices again, after I get the surgery (if I am approved and decide to definitely get it). I needed to move back in with her for financial reasons, and we'll be living together for at least another year. I'm thinking that once I find a support group, I'm going to make her come with me to meetings. We need to do this together. I don't want to lose her due to her weight-related health problems, and I'm sure she doesn't want to lose me, either. I'm so glad your mom is doing so well two years after her surgery! And I'm happy for you having your sleeve done! I need to rush off of here soon, but I definitely would like to talk to you more! =)

That's crazy; I also recently moved back in with my mom after separating from my husband! She has been a big help and inspiration for me. I see how well she did and how she continues to maintain her healthy weight and it makes me so happy for her and optimistic for our future. I remember how she was before when she was so sick and couldn't do much because she got tired fast. She never had energy and was always depressed. Today she is like a completely different woman from the one I grew up with! Besides looking amazing, she also feels great! She is full of energy, can run around with my three year old and not get tired and she says she feels like she's in her 20s again and she's 52! Now it's my turn to feel young! After all, we are still young! I don't know about you but carrying all this extra weight around makes me feel so much older than I am. I am sad when I get easily worn out and can't keep up with my daughter! And seeing my mom who is much older than me but can do more than me makes me so depressed! I knew that I had to get healthy not only for myself but also for my baby. She needs her mommy to be fit to play with her, to pick her up and to be young and full of life! And let me tell you, just having the sleeve has already changed my attitude completely! Today I got on the scale and saw 199 and I was ecstatic! Only one week out and I already reached my first mini-goal to be under 200! I feel so great! I feel younger and healthier and happier! I know that it will keep getting better and better! My next mini-goal is to reach 190 by my first official weigh in next week and I know I can do it! I once thought that surgery was like failing or giving up but now I know that the opposite is true. The sleeve is a wonderful and powerful tool in helping us get healthy, physically AND emotionally. You will be so happy that you are doing it at a young age. My mom and many others I know who have done it say that they wish they had done it sooner. You and I are very lucky to have this opportunity at our age instead of having to live another 20-30 year of dieting and failing and being depressed. Please feel free to message me privately at any time. My personal email is stomstemi at hotmail (I also use msn messenger with that name if you use it). I also have aim - thisisnotmyaimsn and google chat - thisisnotmyemail@gmail and also skype - mommyducky9. I look forward to chatting with you! Take care!

Much love,
Lee

[shaminthedevil]

Hi,
I am new to the site and am already so happy that I joined. I have found that there are so many people and so much support here that I am sometimes taken back. There is no judgement as we are all on the same journey, only at different places on the road. I hope that you find all the answers that you need!

[sally321]

it is a great site. dont know what I would do without it. I have found out so many helpful things on here. when it comes to the issues that Im dealing my family and friends are very supportive but no one really understands what I am going through... everyone on here has either been through it or is going to go through it so they full understand and can give you the correct advice. every time I get depressed I come on here and take comfort in knowing that Im not alone