Need advice

[monkey67girl]

Ok guys....I have had a really rough few days...not with the surgery/eating just in my personal life.....Because of the depression that comes from the drama...of course my old self reared its ugly head and I bought a bag of lays sour cream and onion chips....They taste so good...and unfortunately have not bothered me at all.....OMG....Now I just keep shoving them in....what is my problem and WHY don't they make me sick....

Just needed to vent or wine for a minute....I just hate myself for letting things make me revert back to those habits..I so wanted to move forward and leave those habits behind.....I know the surgery is just a tool..I have to do the work.....Disappointed in myself...Which makes me want to eat more....vicious cycle....

[Fitforlife1978]

Don't be so hard on yourself. Just remember what it was like to be in the 300's and how uou felt when you hit the 2's. I just had my surgery last week and I cannot wait to get in to 200's. All of us will stumble, but getting back up will be the key. Never allow an entire large bag of lays. Go to the store and buy a small snack size. You should be able to have special treats from time to time. Use your tool to teach moderation. Hang in there!

[ScouterJim]

I look at days like this differently. Okay, you fell off the wagon and have learned there is an area of your new healthy lifestyle that still needs some work. Don't beat yourself up more than you have already. You are human and not a machine. We all have bad days where our old habits show their head. It doesn't mean that you have failed. You have lost 41 lbs. That is a major accomplishment to be proud of. Now you have learned that next time things get rough you will have to stay away from the chips. I'm willing to bet that more often that not you will stay away from them now that you know they go down too easy. Those few times that you don't stay away from them just remember the times that you did. Give yourself permission to have a human moment and when it's done jump back on the wagon and continue with all of the great work that you have been doing so far.

[monkey67girl]

Thank you both....I am hard on myself....I guess tomorrow is a new day....

[Golden ticket]

Oh I so get how you feel! We're human and we are going to have bumps along the way...........stay strong and push thru this and toss those chips down the garbage disposal,(I've been tempted to take something from top of trash in house! Gross) �� I've been having a rough few days with my sixteen yr old daughter and feeling depressed and anxious (bully's at school), so I get it. Takes a strong person to "put it out there " good for you! Wendy

[karenl3]

Jim! You are from Calgary as well! Great advise everyone. Don't beat yourself up. Just do what you can, learn from this and move on. You have lost so much weight. I'm thinking you are doing great.

[BigDogMom]

It is totally ok to vent and whine here to us! That's the whole point of support.
You need to remember to give yourself some grace. It's a long process, and it's really difficult sometimes. Like Jim said, you've identified a sensitive point that can trip you up. Don't beat yourself up for being human. If there are things that we keep up on a pedestal, some kind of "forbidden fruit", then we haven't dealt with the psychology of it. You need to have some available treats, things that are ok for you to eat since you're becoming a healthier you. Look for some baked crackers that are sour cream & onion flavor. Use a food scale to separate out one portion at a time, and use those little snack size zipploc bags. Being successful on any diet takes some preparation. But you're doing great!
Don't discount your accomplishment so far! Hang in there!

[Leanng]

I agree with everyone above. When you let those things that are tough on you into your house, eat a few and give the rest away, or throw them away. I also agree with Golden Ticket - make it so that they can't be recovered when you throw them away.

I had chips in my house for Super Bowl - I had a few and everyone left with a bag, or partial bag. When the day was done the food left the house.

I have a couple of things, like pizza. We can have pizza once a month (I don't have to, but I can. When I have pizza I can eat almost 1 piece. I write that day on my calendar and know that when 30 days go by I can have it again. Doesn't mean I have to have it, but I can have it.

You can be disappointed in yourself for a few minutes, then get over it and get on with it. You are doing so good don't beat yourself up over this. The old habits die hard and not all at once.

Good luck to you tomorrow and on.

[kenson]

You are human, you are not perfect. I remember a weight watchers leader told me once "progress, not perfection." Just remember how you feel right now and the next time a stressful situation comes up, channel this feeling and hopefully you will do something else. Its a learning process for us all, we all will have to find different coping mechanisms. You can do it!

[girliegirl777]

Please don't feel bad; I think we will probably have to struggle and internally argue with ourselves for the rest of our lives. I have been pretty successful with weight loss since my surgery, but I have eaten crap way too many times in the last 4.5 months. For some reason, I thought it was ok to order a desert every night when we were on vacation in Maui. I try to think about my behavior and get better and I guess I do improve, but it still bothers me.

Even today, I was leaving work and was hungry because I failed to bring anything for lunch and got caught in a meeting during lunch time and couldn't get a salad. I went to the vending machine to get something to eat. I was arguing with myself internally, but went ahead and bought a bag of chips. The chips got stuck in the machine, so I stuck my hand up to get them and ended up pinching my finger really hard. Then I thought, "this is a sign that I shouldn't be buying chips!" I walked away and left the stupid chips. So now, my finger is killing me! That stupid vending machine has been the bane of my existence at work. I used to buy a Twix candy bar almost every night before I went home. I would hide it up my sleeve and eat it in the bathroom before I went home in order to hide the wrappers from my husband and co-workers. So Sad!

[BelindaK]

Chips are a wicked food for some people, they slide right out of your stomach. You get all the calories with none of the restriction!
Anyhow, I always keep snacks around...anything I want. Seriously. I've found that when I eat my regular (healthy) meals I don't really have room to mess myself up. My rule is that before I can have a treat, I have to have my protein rich, nutrient dense food. Now when I have a treat, its a square of chocolate, not an entire bar. Splurge on the money to buy single serve bags of chips or like someone else mentioned, put them in small ziplocks. And try to divert your emotional eating...try a half apple with some peanut butter or cheese. Or get some whole grain crackers and have a few with some Laughing Cow cheese on them. Don't let yourself get into that binge/guilt merry-go-round because that'll throw you off track way more than a few chips.

[Narasweet]

Being gluten free helps but something I have as emergency travel rations and sometimes snacks are protein bars, low carb and sugar and can keep me going well until next meal, just an idea...but I have stumbled at times, just cannot let it slide too much, even though I have stalled for more than a month I am still a work in progress, lol

[tinman]

Ok...what I am about to type is going to piss off a lot of folks, but, it seems like I do that a lot on here...so...here goes.

You did not fall off the wagon, make a bad choice, or let yourself down. Remember, only you get to make the rules. Not someone else. You spent an entire lifetime trying to bend and shape yourself to conform to an idea of diet and weight management that belonged to someone who wasn't living your life, who wasn't stuck in your body, and who had zero concept of your background and challenges to weight loss.

That struggle didn't work. Know how I know? Because you, like everyone else on here, had to resort to getting sleeved to help with your weight loss. So, the repeated feelings of desperation and self loathing are a result of your constant and repeated failures at diet. Diets don't work for folks like you and me.

Let me make sure you got that.

DIETS DON'T WORK FOR FOLKS LIKE YOU AND ME!!!

So, why are you allowing someone's idea of what is and isn't good for you in your post op life color your attitude? If you want to break a cycle, break the cycle of self hate and loathing. One bag of chips will not hurt you. Hell, you can eat one bag a day and still lose all weight you are going to lose. The key is portion control. Also, read up on slider foods. That's what chips are and that's why you can eat tons of the little boogers and not get full or sick.

Now, I happen to think I know why the urge to eat those chips was so hard for you to control. I'm not going to go into it on your vine because my theories seem to rile up a lot of folks. Let's just say, in my opinion, there is a good reason why you wanted the potato chips.

Here's the mantra

Carbs are good for you.

You are not on a diet.

Since you are not on a diet, you can't fail at a diet.

Eat protein dense foods like they are Lay's Potato Chips..seriously...protein is one of the keys

Drink your 64 ounces of water per day.......hydration is the other major key to success

And you must never, ever, ever, ever, ever over eat.

Portein, hydration, portion control...those are they keys.

It ain't about what you eat, it's about how much of it you eat. The sleeve is designed to limit your portions and that is the catalyst to weight loss. Use the tool and don't let the crap about good nutrition and falling off the wagon and all of the other tripe get in the way. Enjoy the sleeve and enjoy the trip.

[Dyson]

Don't be so hard on yourself. The beauty of this surgery is that it allows us to reset our relationship with food. In the future you will eat a chip or two (well maybe not you) but there will be foods that you should not eat that you can because you are so restricted physically. It sounds like chips are a slider food for you, which means they actually slide through the sleeve without any effect...my two are popcorn and beef jerkey. Know that slider foods have the ability to stretch your sleeve, simply because of the amounts our sleeves will hold. Keep that in mind, the last thing you want to do is reverse this surgery. Talk to your surgeon about the depression, there are tools s/he can use to help you through it.

I have to be very conscious of slider foods as does everybody with a sleeve or bypass surgery, toss the bag you have and any other bags that may be hanging around, it is obvious that you are intouch with your depression, so know when you are there to stay away from this food. If you are doing low carb/low calorie, whatever your diet, find that food that you love that you can eat a bunch of without destroying your diet and eat that, make sure it is something that you love.

Take this opportunity to give yourself a pat on the back for recognizing a problem and reaching out for help, know that food does not rule your life your world, that this is a small blip in life that you will overcome. Move forward, love yourself, walk an extra mile this week to work through the self imposed guilt. You've got this kiddo! Good luck



Edited to add:

I agree completely with tinman, we should not be on a diet anymore, your sleeve is your diet, however, this is a slider food for you so don't give into it...know what it is, how it can harm you and stay away from it. I say always that I eat whatever I can tolerate, and I do, foods I can not tolerate include slider foods.

[Grace]

Everyone else touched on the emotional aspects and I'm not one to give advise on that since I'm not doing so well after all this time.. but I can say it helps to keep something in the house that is better to eat and will satisy your particular cravings you get instead of fighting them, which will cause you to overdo them when you let go, which you will.
Like this:
Sour cream chips = small baking potatoes, sour cream and onion sprinkle (in the popcorn aisle in little shakers) and spray butter on top. You can eat only about one potato mashed up with the skin and be incredibly full instead of a bag of chips.
Chocolate = Ghiardelli unsweetened powdered cocoa - a good heavy dose in a protein smoothie with some sweetener - hot or cold.
Popcorn = butter flavored rice cake or corn cake with some extra butter on top (too dry otherwise) I put these in the toaster oven first (watch carefully!) for just a minute to warm them to melt the butter.
You see the idea. Find the flavor and do something denser, and healthier with it if you can.
And if you find yourself with a bag of chips in your hand and you even get the feeling like you've had enough, empty the bag into an empty sink and spray them down with the sink sprayer to ruin them. Then clean them up and throw them out. Just that process is helpful.