Finding my inner diva - Grace's journey

[Grace]

Hi
Well, seems we tell our journeys here... so I'll try.
I'm 51, and according to the standard charts I have 200 lbs to lose. That alone is scary but this is also my 12th surgery in my 51 yrs. Swore I'd never let them cut into me again but I'm desperate after gaining over 100 lbs with my autoimmune disorders. I don't have to tell a lot of you about thyroid issues, do I? So frustrating!! But my weight has been stable now for 9 months so I feel comfortable giving this a shot. At first I was out of the running as Harvard Pilgrim was not covering this procedure. But I poked and prodded and begged and provided info to the decision making people. I'm sure that had nothing to do with it, but as of June 3 they now covers VSG so I'm back on track. Have seen the dietician and my biggest problem so far is all the low cal smoothies have art. sweeteners and I just plain can't have any, including the so-called natural ones like stevia. Not with interstitial cystitis.
So, I'm working on a smoothie with the required protein, carbs and such that I can manage.
So far it looks like some soy milk, 1/2 cup yogurt and frozen strawberries with a scoop of whey protein. I love it with crushed pineapple but it pushed the carbs up too high. She wants me to drink 2 of these a day and have two meals a day for now.
I have time restraints. I'm scared my husband's company will change insurances on me again in October or the copays will go up. So I need to get this over and done by then or I may be out of luck. I'm aiming for end of August / early Sept so my DSIL (dear sister in law) can come up to be with my DMIL while I'm out of commission.
So here's my first question dear comrades in weight loss -
How long after the procedure should I expect to be unable to drive and do basic housework type chores like cooking for my DMIL?
My "work" is to drive the 2 hrs to her house, take care of things like shopping, cooking, pills, etc 3 days a week. Wondering how long I need to make adjustments for....
So, how long was it before you were back doing basic stuff?
If it matters, I think I heal at about an average weight.

Also wondering how many who had insurance paying for it had to pay for their own psych eval and support group? The doc my surgeon uses is not on my insurance so I'm trying to figure out how to pay for it....I'm frustrated they won't just take a letter from my own psychologist, who I've seen for years and certainly knows me better...

thanks! Have a great weekend!

[newjoanie]

I paid out of pocket for psyc and nut for a few visits. Support group is free so I am good there. The Psych had more information and testing about the wls than you might get from your regular psych. They are very specific in their evaluation.

[Dana]

I looked up a psych that my insurance covered and I still had to pay out of pocket first, then gt reimbursed. plus she charged my 40 dollars not covered by insurance just to fax it to my dr. who was about 3 min from her office. anyway! Everybody is different with their healing but we are not supposed to be pulling and pushing, like mopping and vacuuming for a month I think. and even though I went back to work after a week and I was still very tired. my work is super light duty btw. of course I wasnt able to tolerate the protein or vitamins so I was really tired. I went shopping but couldnt get much. I was too weak. I felt good when I started but It wore off when I was on my feet for 15 min. I had only built up my walking to about 10 min twice a day. this may not be the norm but it is a possibility and I personally know one other person who had the same problem. I hope your SIL has a flexible schedule and I hope somebody can take care of YOU for a few days. I dont want to spook you and make it sound so bad, it really wasnt a bad recovery. I know you CAN take care of somebody else, lots of people do it with children at home. if you can take a month then take it. if yo feel better sooner then get back at it. Best wishes!

[Kaye]

Had to pay for my own surgery, so that doesn't apply. But as for the recovery time, I had to take a week off work. I was not suppose to lift more than 10 pounds for a month, and only do "light" household chores ( which like Dana said, does not include vacuuming and mopping). But I did feel fine. The only problem with cooking is that you will be on liquids for a week or so (depending on your doctor as to how long), and then pureed foods for about the same length of time, before graduating to soft foods. Cooking full meals may not be the best thing to do. For me, I didn't care for the smell of a lot of foods right after surgery. The longer your dear-sister-in-law can stay, the better. Good luck with your journey.

[Grace]

I have so much admiration for all of you who pay for your own surgery. I can't fathom every managing doing that, I'm having enough trouble coming up with the $1500 copay.
Mom has other caretakers, so if I need, they can take over for up to I'd say 3 wks between DSIL and her other 2 caretakers. She just gets upset if she doesn't see me as she's used to me. I'll just have to get hubby to bring me to visit when DSIL goes home to see how things are going and I can have him take care of some things for once...he won't mind, it's his mom after all.
Thanks so much for the info. I'm going to be buying lots of frozen dinners for hubby as his cooking is limited to microwave and grilled cheese.
Hubby will be with me for 4 days then my daughter are taking turns for 3 or 4 more. I should be ok to do basic stuff like make my own smoothies and things after a week, right?

Hey, another question.... I have a softside waterbed. Hard to get out of now, never mind with a sore stomach. I'm thinking I'll need to sleep on the futon for a few days after I get home...sound reasonable?

[Kaye]

The futon is a good idea for the first few weeks.

[Grace]

Thanks ladies, your success is inspiring

[Dana]

Actually the water bed wasnt hard. I have to have one bc my back cant take anything else. mine is free flow so I have the old hard frame around it and I always have to roll out and over the egde, I cant just sit up. I had a little trouble with my cuts for the gall bladder surgery a month before my vsg but I took it so i could sleep in my wonderful waterbed. but when I had my sleeve, I really didnt have any problems at all. not sure of the difference, both were laproscopic. You will know by the time you get home if its will be too much. when i was in the hospital my cuts pulled some when I got up and having an IV I was going to the bathroom every two hours so by the time I left I had worked the soreness out. I did have my futon ready before surgery just in case though. Love my waterbed!

[Grace]

Thanks Dana - I can always get hubby to move things for me if I need to I guess. I've had a waterbed for 35 yrs, hardside for years but now softside. Up here in Maine it's so nice to get into a warm bed in the winter.

[gonnadoit]

when I had my hysterectomy, couldn't do waterbed and slept in daughters bed for a while, she was already in college. I have gotten used to sleeping in queen since hubby likes to sleep with the dogs and the bed is lower. Plus I now have the CPAP which I have yet to let anyone see my wear. My hubby will be with me day of surgery and day after then he has to go back to work hopefully I can come home soon and then we will have to see how I can handle it alone. Can't ask him to take more time as he is about to retire 4th of July. I am just praying I can put my big girl panties on and do this. My dghtr has to work as their office just moved and she can't get time off, my dghtr in law tells me she is not good with sick people lol. Not going to ask anyone to put themselves out as most are still uncertain if this is a good idea. I will just have to grin and bear it to prove to all of them it is worth it. by thee way I AM SCARED SHITLESS sorry

[Grace]

Gonnadoit,
I"m sorry you're feeling frightened. Since you've had a "hystie" (I have too) you know this has to be less pain than that. This is laproscopic at least. I don't know about you but my hystie scar is 9 inches long. I think this surgery is less scary than either of the other options. I don't want to live with malabsorbtion all my life, and the thought of having the lap band device inside me just messes with my mind. I'm taking courage from all the fine people here who are saying it will be ok....
I'm pretty lucky with hubby taking time. He has time saved up and will put in for it a month ahead if possible. Too bad you can't wait till hubby retires... but these things come as they will.

[bobbybeegood]

by thee way I AM SCARED SHITLESS sorry

Don't be, I can appreciate your anxiety, I am about 4 days out. So tuff talk for me but I know you'll (we'll) do fine. My daughter is my sleeve buddy & there are 3 other ppl from the forum who will be there with us at Dr Almanaz in TJ on wed. So, we all have strength together! Don't be fooled, it is MAJOR surgery but it also has a wonderful safety record. Like I tell everyone, I wouldn't let them lay a finger on my daughter if I didn't believe there was a tremendous positive safety record with it!

[roxyringo]

i am having mine on sat...so only 5 days left...i just figure i would rather go through this now ... rather than be bedridden and relying on a scooter when i am older to get about...if you have had children you can do nething...that is keeping me mentally strong! I am a woman...i have had a child...with emergency c-section so this will be fine! couple of weeks of pain for a whole new slim life it will be worth it...just keep thinking that and you are doing this to live longer and enjoy likfe to the full x

[Grace]

roxyringo and all the others having surgery soon - Blessings and great luck!

[Grace]

Using WW to lose the 20 lbs (10% of excess body weight according to someone) that I must lose before surgery can be scheduled. Down 6.8 so far in 2 wks. This is so hard but my daughter is going with me so it's easier with a buddy. Worried a bit I'll lose the weight and have trouble keeping it off until surgery. Just have to believe this is important enough I wont' get derailed.
Won't know my surgery date for a while as I must do the psych stuff first and that means 5 weekly meetings (grr, why do they stretch it out so long)... I won't be done those until 8/24. Going to poke at my doc to set me up for surgery just after that. Worried the copay will go up so much on our ins. come Oct 1 I won't be able to do this! Also must work around SIL's schedule. So for now, just hanging in, learning as much as possible from everyone here about post op including tasting different liq proteins.. and working on losing another 13.2 lbs.
So what's your favorite "clear" liq protein?