Sharing the Excitement

[journeytogether13]

I am so excited about this journey I am about to embark on. However, I am afraid to share it with my family. I have told my husband and daughters and shared everything with them. They are so supportive and really are happy for me. Although I have not shared it with my mom, dad or sister. I want to really bad, especially my mom. I just know how my family is. There isn't too much support from them with things I want to do in my life. I know they will judge me, ridicule me, and tell me I'm cheating and taking the lazy way out. I really don't want to hear all that from them because I am afraid they will take me off my "high" on life that I have right now. What should I do? They are my family and they should know just in case something would go wrong, but I don't need the heartache to crush my dreams.

[fleiniebop1]

Hi there.. I feel the same way.. I have told some people about wanting to get this done. I don't get a lot of slack about the surgery just that I am going to Mexico to do it. I am so confident about this decision that I really don't care. My sleeve would be done already but my funding fell through so I am trying other avenues at this time. Tentivley if I can make things happen my sleeve will be done on May 3rd and I so can not wait. Most of my family think that I have changed my mind and not getting it. So now I have decided to not tell no one. I am going alone to. My boyfriend is suportive but not about me going alone but its just the best way to go i think. I get so so excited and just want it done already.. Good luck with your family!!

[luke]

It's a balance, you need to avoid situations where your support is eroded, but you also don't want o go into this procedure without a good support system to help you. Believe you-me, this is hard. You really want to have at least some people in your everyday life to know what's going on! Be safe!

[Debbie66]

Send out an email, telling them what you are doing and end it with, please only support and kindness, negative comments will be ignored

[Its_Me]

Its up to you. I told my dad and my sister. I have not told my mom. I have told very few people, and no one from work. Oh and of course my son knows.

[journeytogether13]

Thank you all for your thoughts. I really appreciate the things all of you had to say!! I think I have decided to not tell them. Right now I don't need the negative feed back from them. I'm so excited, and I won't let anyone drag me down.

[Truebody]

I have told 3 close friends. My Mum, no, not being told. I don't believe she can handle it and I know that I don't need anymore grief. Communication is strained at the best of times. She is a good woman, loves me, but at her limit for providing support.

[jgilliam1955]

Most people do not understand the sleeve. Family will be scared for you because they think this is a dangerous operation and friends will think you are taking the easy way out. Just get it done & if some one wants to talk then talk. Once people see the results you will be an example & others may get this operation done. I was told afterwards ""This was the best thing I ever done." About 6 people got the sleeve after asking me about it. One woman was ashamed & stayed in her home. Her husband ask me to talk to her. We both cried over the phone about what it is like to be fat. Like me she did not know about the sleeve. A month later she was sleeved & she is down to 130 pounds & has gotten her life back. The sleeve is a giver...it gives your life back. Just remember this is a tool. It makes it easy to lose weight. But it is up to you to keep it off. I look at it this way...it is easier to keep 3 pounds off than 150 pounds. Good luck on your adventure. Bless you.

[journeytogether13]

Thank you jgilliam1955 for your words of thought. I really appreciate everything you have to say. I couldn't agree more with you.... This surgery is so important to me, and I'm at the point I don't care what everyone has to say about me getting it, this is about "ME" and no one else. It is high time I do something for myself in life. I believe for now it is best for me if I just go get the surgery and not tell anyone other than my husband and two daughters. To the rest it is really none of their business. If they ask later I wont lie to them. I will share the truth. But for now it isn't important for them to know.

[aboutime4me]

The decision to have the sleeve is such an individual thing and the same goes for who to tell about the surgery. For myself, my husband was the one who even mentioned it to me at the start. I never knew such a thing existed. When I first heard about it, I thought it was "crazy" myself but the more I thought about it, the more I felt it might be "thee" final answer for me. We went to an informational seminar, and from that time on, the rest is history. Now I'm almost a year down and hit 158 lbs this morning, from a start of 252 lbs. I'm literally half the person I was last year at this time.
That being said...I was very upfront with people in my life about the surgery.

Since I live half way across the country from my family it wasn't so much a concern for me. I did tell everyone I worked with and was very fortunate to be supported by them. I didn't hear any negatives really, at least not to my face. Some did express concern about my safety but no one really gave me any grief about "diet and exercise." Even if they would have, it wouldn't have made any difference to me at all. I KNEW the sleeve was MY WAY to go.

I did tell my sister and brother-in-law while on a visit back home, a few weeks prior to my surgery...just in case something would happen by way of complication, etc. They were supportive and understood, as they themselves have battled obesity and morbid obesity most of their lives as well. The only other family I did not tell was my dad as he was 90 yrs old and I didn't want to worry him, and my aunt and uncle who are my godparents. I think you just "know" who you can share this with and who you can't. Go with your gut feelings on this. Live your life and don't let anyone get you down.

Wishing you all the very best on your journey. It is truly awesome, amazing and one that will take you places you never thought possible!

[HeatherAmy75]

I'm not keeping my sleeve a secret from anyone. I've gotten mixed responses. Most people ask me if I even qualify for the surgery because they don't think I'm "big enough". Then I have to explain the whole I have a co-morbidity thing (Sleep Apnea) so I do qualify at a lower BMI. No one has said they think I'm taking the easy way out but some, like my grandmother and a dear friend (like a mother to me), are extremely worried and say I don't need it. I feel like I have to do this for myself and for my daughter and what others say isn't going to change my mind. You can't let what everyone else thinks get you down.

[abequa2000]

I have only told my kids and husband well he had to know since I needed a ride home from the hospital lol and a few close family members that I know will be there for me the others are negative nellies so no they don't know.