I See Fat People

[pack89]

Well, to be brutally honest...before my surgery, I would notice people that were bigger than me. I would always think "dang, I know I'm big, but they are huge!" I would think of all of my own struggles and feel bad for them, because I was sure they had to have it even worse than me. I don't really have any co-morbids other than high cholesterol, but I know how miserable I am/was. I am down 45# from my highest and like everyone else, I still feel fat. I just feel so bad for other "big" people and their struggles, that I hope the stigma of WLS someday goes away and that this surgery will be available for anyone needing it.

I would never go up to a stranger and say "hey, you're fat, you should have surgery like I did." Years ago, my MIL and I did this "diet" with these chewable tablets that were supposed to suppress your appetite. They worked for a short while, I lost about 20-30# (gained it all back and then some!) and my MIL lost about 40#. Of course that made her an instant expert and she would go up to random people and tell them they were fat and needed to do this "diet." You can't believe how many people she offended doing that. I had people coming up to me and complaining. So I would never do that to someone. If they came up to me and asked, I would share, but I would never have the nerve to do that to someone.

[Sunflower]

Yes, have noticed and I feel bad that I have my secret. Last night my son's friend's dad was at our house. He is easily over 450. He also looks very unwell and his every move take tremendous effort. He brought up the subject of weightloss and told us that he's been on a "very successful plan at Kaiser, losing 16 pounds over the past 4 months, and a total of 30 since last September". I was just so sad for him, I'm thinking, Dude! A guy your size would lose 150 EASY in that amount of time, if you'd had the sleeve! Knowing the statistical odds are against him also makes me sad. He's a really nice guy and if he'd asked me how I had lost my weight I think I would have told him. But I also believe that not everyone is ready for bariatric surgery nor do they want it. He has an insurance program that covers this so he could have pursued this if he wanted to. I have to respect his decision and try not to push my enthusiasm on him even though I thnk he should also go the WLS route. It's a tough call.

[BeautifulMama]

Yes, I do notice more fat people. I always have the urge to give them a hug and share how I'm helping myself get healthy (I don't because I don't want to offend anyone and hugging strangers is just weird) . I also started to notice other people's shopping carts. I'm shocked at the amount of junk food people load their carts up with!...and I'm not just talking about fat people's carts. Anyhow, I thank God for this blessing of the sleeve and that I'm finally happy again!

Susie

[aboutime4me]

This has always been an issue for me for years as I looked at others around me, on the street, on tv, etc. I must confess to judgement as well while all the while being in real denial of my own obesity. I knew I was "fat" but when you put the word obesity into a conversation, it really sounds bad. When I see heavy people it almost makes me cringe because I know it doesn't necessarily have to be that way. I know so many factors go into people being obese especially heredity and other medical factors, but I also think our personal choices come in there for the greater part as well. It's such a catch-22 situation and there's enough "blame" to go around for people being so heavy in this country.

I do tell anyone who happens to ask now about my surgery. I sing its' praises but again I know it's not an option for everyone, not only because of insurance issues but psychological as well. This is an extreme surgery in deciding to remove most of one's stomach and not one that really is a blanket thing for everyone who might be obese.

I am working on myself now and am trying not to judge others when I see them. In this way, if I can be an example to someone else or stimulate their own thought about their weight and being healthier, then that's great.

[ladyberg]

Now that my numbers are going down on the scale, I also notice not only an obesity problem but also the amount of food that others consume. I know that use to be me eating all those calories- but now that I can no longer eat that much I see others with mounds of food on their plate and think- how can they possible eat that much?.

[Stephy]

I have definitly noticed heavier people around me...I thought it was just me, nice to know I'm not alone...and yes, I'm still a fatty...but I feel like im on my way to getting healthy & not being fat...I just feel bad for those are extremely obese, especially for young people, teens.

[SECRETSLEEVE]

I think I noticed this just as much before as I do now. This is probably because I have always been "dieting" my whole life. I would never suggest wls to anyone. It was suggested to me a while back and I was by no means mentally ready for wls. I agree with the comment the wls has a huge mental aspect. A person really has to be mentally ready and feel like they want to change and have tried everything. If someone asked me for my opinion about wls I would give it to them, yet I would not just bring it up. I am so happy that the sleeve was available, I really didn't want the bypass and by researching wls was when I discovered the sleeve. I think it is a great alternative to the bypass, with much less complication.

[dogs&cats]

I got on the plane on my way to Mx for surgery. I fit just fine in the airplane seat with the seat belt on. I sat in the middle seat with a tiny business woman using a laptop on the isle and beside a very large man in the window seat. The man's large belly completely hid the seat belt (I assume he had it on tucked underneath his belly). Every single time a flight attendant made the rounds he was asked if he had his seat belt on - very embarassing for him! He also didn't have enough room for his shoulders to actually sit with his back in the seat and spent 3.5 hours leaning forward hunched in his seat. He had no room for his legs. Even with me leaning on the arm rest towards the tiny business woman on the other side to try and give him room. Then he ordered a big submarine sandwich and cookies off the food cart and ate. He didn't talk to anyone. I'd been on the pre-op diet for a month already and hadn't eaten actual food in days. (boy did that sandwich smell good)! I had such a hard time not opening my mouth to say something - anything - about where I was going and that I was having surgery. But I didn't. I felt bad for him as he was clearly uncomfortable and didn't fit in the seat. When I see heavy people struggling with everyday things like not being able to walk through Walmart without using a motorized cart, needing help with everything, not fitting through doorways or being able to climb stairs, being discriminated against in job interviews etc I can't help but feel bad for them. I may fit into an airplane seat but I still know what it's like to wish I was invisible in public and it's not a happy place to be.

[BCmomabear]

I am 2 months post sleeve and have been open with anyone I think could benefit in knowing about this surgery. I want to help this procedure become well known and more accessible for anyone who needs it and wants it.

I have noticed that I have more compassion for obese people and am less judgmental than ever before since surgery. This has been an interesting shift for me. What is that really all about? Possibly about self acceptance. To choose this surgery was to finally admit that my weight unacceptable, undesirable and unhealthy. In choosing surgery, I kind of felt like I was be a traitor to my true self. It seemed hypocritical to suddenly say that I need to change myself fundamentally, when I had worked so hard to be the happy, successful, accomplished woman that I am. The journey thus far has been a real head trip, and I am only 2 months post sleeving. The surgery was an option that I can now say, I can't imagine not having.

[BraelynsGrammy]

I call it motivation! I see it everywhere. I am often caught saying "Thank God I had surgery." I know it's not nice but honestly it is my motivation. Even people I work with know I had the surgery but they still keep eating and gaining weight. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink it.

[happydiva]

I thought that it was just me, I am noticing it more too. On the flip side I also see people inspired by my weight loss. Friends are starting to work out more, co workers too. But yes, there is a woman I work with everyday I want to just hug her and tell her how beautiful she is because she seems so sad.