Discouragement..

[buddyd11]

Thank you all for your responses to my post. At times I know we all have kinda down moments. I am so thankful for finding this site for support I love you all. On a side note yesterday I played in a local golf tournament and when I was at the registration table the lady was filling up my goodie bag and actually asked me "Large or extra large shirt sir" I was like Hell yea!!!!
I usually do try and stay as positive about everything in life as I possibly can, I get weak as anyone at times I guess, so again thank you all for lifting my spirits..

[Santy]

Perhaps your wife is feeling insecure with the new hot you. You may have to reassure her and or ask for her continued support as she must have been a great supporter of you in the past now is time to perhaps give her reassurance you are not going to leave her etc. I could be wrong of course!
Buddy you have done so well in your journey but it does take time to get over the mental block of being thinner after what seems a life time of carrying all the baggage. Keep on trucking and be positive knowing we are all behind you trying to catch up with your loss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[buddyd11]

OK, Friday night we went to a coworkers going away party at which I drank wayyyy too much, I got on the dance floor and my wife video taped it on her phone, the next morning she showed it to me and I was like wow that is me? It almost ended up ugly when some lady I have never met before slapped me on my ass while we were dancing, OMG I thought my wife was gonna attack that lady..... It was funny to me at the time but lord with me leaving in a week to move to Florida I got an earful from her. oy its gonna be a tough 2 months until they come up to meet me there....

[Santy]

OK hottie just make sure of the reassurance or you are going to be in trouble!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jersey John]

Damn Buddy, sometimes I swear you are my brother from another mother....

I feel the same way. I look a clothed reflection of myself and think "WoW!, look at how far you've come!"....Then I take the shirt off and think "WoW! look at how far you have to go!" I just don't know when all the fat I see will be part of the numbers disappearing. We have to reach a healthy BMI eventually so it's coming upon us, but at times its really hard to fathom how we are going to get there. And I guess as others have said, we can be our own toughest critic...

[Tammy64]

I decided to keep my eyes closed when I'm naked.....just look at myself clothed...lol

[Jersey John]

I'll donate my brain to science too if they can figure that one out! Lol Eve!!!

BTW....Can I get the rest? ;p

[Evie Sleevie]

So....Jersey John is a necrophiliac?

[Jersey John]

So....Jersey John is a necrophiliac?

Who said anything about sex Is it really necrophilia if she's still warm?

I kid...I kid...;p

[Grace]

Chiming in here...
This is how it's happening in my head.
When I am actually losing weight, and can see the proof on the scale and in a new clothing size...I feel pretty good. Like weight loss high. I look at myself critically and take pics and put them side by side and say...ok.... I really truly have lost weight. I might even look... good... kinda...

But months like this, where I lost absolutely no weight? I swear I do not feel 1 lb lighter than I did at 335. Not 1. In fact most of my notes in my weight journal this month start with something like "I hate my body". Some things have nothing to do with body size, but emotionally based images of ourselves we store away. For me, apparently it's all about what my body has done for me lately.

Factually based I understand I am wearing a size 18 and not a size 30. When I am moving around, walking, getting up from a chair, I can feel the difference if I pay attention....As I sit here typing, I can't feel the difference at all.
When I went to a store today I hadn't visited in months, the cashier was all over how thin I was and how she respected all I'd gone through to get where I am. Huh? I thought... isn't it nice of her to be so kind when it's obvious I'm still a big fat lump?

I think perhaps we expect to feel fundamentally "different" somehow. In my case it's like I wanted my body to be able to move like it did in High School when I was on the gymnastics team. Well... um.. NOT! (never mind my size, I'm going to be 53 this summer) And now I'm pretty much convinced I'll never feel "light", no matter how much weight I lose, but, I also understand it's because it's my emotions that aren't light and that is what I will need to work on if I want a less "heavy" life.
I guess the long and short, or fat and thin of it is, it's the emotional baggage we need to drop as much as it is the pounds....
Oh, and I keep having the same dream that I wake up at my pre-surgery weight and this has all been a dream, like a bad season of Dallas.

I'll chime in that you look wonderful dear Buddy!

[justme1]

Oh Grace I understand where you are coming from...this baggage we carry with us weighs us down, so to speak. I have started couseling and praying it will help lift this burden. I will be 62 in June and the older I get the "heavier" this baggage is. I will never be a size 6 but going from a 24 to a 14 should make me feel better but I look in the mirror and still see the me I have seen for so many years. You will be in my prayers!!!

[Evie Sleevie]

Who said anything about sex Is it really necrophilia if she's still warm?

I kid...I kid...;p

OMG, you are a sick puppy, John!!! Is Carolyn single?? You 2 NEED to meet if she is!

You are killing me over here!!

[carolynodien]

OMG, you are a sick puppy, John!!! Is Carolyn single?? You 2 NEED to meet if she is!

You are killing me over here!!

Yes, I am single, but Jersey John is NOT (naughty panda!).

If anyone knows of an good SINGLE men out there, please send them my way!!!

[buddyd11]

Yes, I am single, but Jersey John is NOT (naughty panda!).

If anyone knows of an good SINGLE men out there, please send them my way!!!

Does living in Florida all alone for 2 months count for being single? lol

[Evie Sleevie]

Um, NO Buddy!! Nice try, though!!

I thought John was getting a divorce...hmmm.

Carolyn, you are a hottie. What's wrong with the guys in California?? Good men are hard to find...