After 2 yrs of living too far away from the pool to get in and move around I'm swimming 3 days a week. Some days it's just gentle movement, some I can actually swim a lap or two, depends on my CFIDS and myofascial pain.
Since March 20th, the spring solstice, I've been concentrating on a year of getting healthier. Lots and lots of journaling to see what works and doesn't food wise, emotionally and physically. If I lose some weight, terrific, I'll take it...but if my body has decided that 1200 calories a day is it for me to maintain and that's all I get is to be around 250...then I'm simply not going to beat myself up anymore.
My niece had sleeve surgery 3 wks ago. She's in the hospital today with an infection in her spleen from the surgery to remove the band and do a sleeve. I suggested she ask the doc to wait between the surgeries for her to heal but they did it all in one day. Now I am so worried for her. I told my mother yesterday that I am just plain sick of the women in my family (my aunts, myself and my nieces have all had bariatric surgery and been left sick) almost killing themselves to have a smaller body size, when none of us was sick prior to surgery. It's done now, so we move forward. This next year is about healing, living gently and seeing what happens. If next March I weigh what I do now, I am going to buy some nice clothes and get on with my life. If I have dropped weight, fine, then my new clothes will be a smaller size. But it won't make me a better or worse person, no matter what size I am wearing. That, above all else, is the biggest lesson learned from sleeve surgery. Wanting to have less fat is good. Hating ourselves because we have that fat in the first place is NOT good. Acceptance of our bodies after two or more years out is crucial to our mental health.
off to practice what I preach (I am, actually, an ordained priestess)... and go love myself enough to drive the 17 miles and slip into some incredibly lovely warm water. Peace, blessings, love and light!