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livingonaprayer

WARNING: Bad habits can re-surface when something devastating happens in your life

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livingonaprayer
, 06-06-2013 at 09:57 PM (1266 Views)
I have been dealing with my Mom's health problems for about 5 years now. In 2011, she was admitted to a nursing home for 24/7 care. Every now and then she had a problem that was fixable. Beginning this past Jan., her health really started to deteriorate more quickly. Having CHF and Pulmonary Hypertension along with diabetes and other problems, caused her body to retain fluid that just didn't seem to "go away" even after having 4 parensentesis in 8 weeks. It has caused her to lose her balance and fall. She is now at the point she cannot walk even with assitance. 2 weeks ago she went to the ER w/ chest pains which turned out to be a gallbladder attack/infection. This ultimately led to a whole host of other things: ulcers on her toes, high potassium, kidney failing and heart weekening. They have placed a PICC in her neck so they can get medications into her easier including a new medicine to help the heart (dobutamine) in small doses to see how her body reacts. Her heart specialist said that if she doesn't turn the corner on this, she will be staying in the hospital until she passes which wouldn't be long. I'm devastated. I've been taking care of my Mom since my Dad died 17 years ago. I can't imagine losing her so quickly. My emotions are everywhere.

Well, the point of my story is this............I found myself picking on foods way more than I normally would have. I must have had at least 5-6 girl scout cookies in addition to other "snacks". I am trying to go back to starting over since I can't move a lot because of my foot surgery and I'm not easily losing weight. Being upset, sad, etc. is my trigger emotions. I've got to get them in check even thought I am going through a difficult time. I am feeling guilty.

This is especially for newbies.........always keep in check what you are eating. Eat the right foods for the right reasons. Yes, if you fall off the wagon, just get back up and do the right thing. That is what I am trying to do.

Thanks for taking the time to read my blog. God bless and much success to you all! {hugs}

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Comments

  1. sandiinmo's Avatar
    So sorry about your mother. Just take care of yourself. I'll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers. Warmest regards to you.
  2. SANDRA62's Avatar
    It is hard when mom starts to be sick...My mom lives with me and she gave me a scare a few weeks ago---she's ok now, but I can't even imagine what you are going through...be strong (throw out those evil GSC's) and come here and share---sometimes that helps a ton...we will listen...

    P.S. you mom knows what you have done for her...as a mom...I applaud you!
  3. Rox's Avatar
    I lost my Mom Christmas day 2012, my heart weeps with you
  4. nanajana's Avatar
    I know how hard this is for you. My Mom lived with us for 18 years, when we finally put her in nursing home due to failing heart I was a mess. I wanted her to live she was my best friend, I wanted her to pass because taking care of her was eating me alive. Then when she did pass I felt such horrible guilt I nearly ate myself to death. Statistics show care takers will get a major illness after the person they are caring for passes. I got breast cancer. Take care of yourself, its ok to leave it to the pros. Your Mom knows you love her and she would not want you giving up your health for her. Remember dear one your stronger than you think keep your chin up!
  5. hope4me's Avatar
    You are going though a lot right now. and it is understandable that you are feeling what you are. I do agree with what someone told you about taking care of yourself. I know it can be easier said than done sometimes but I believe this is something you can do. You and your mom are in my prayers. Thanks for sharing your blog.
  6. juniper's Avatar
    I understand what you are going thru, i just lost my mother and the day of her funeral my sister was hospitalized and found she has cancer. I went thru that for about 2 weeks but i finally kicked myself and stopped. I think the best advice i can give is if you feel the need for the snacking at least snack on healthy foods, carrots. protein bars etc. stay away from the sugar.
  7. DebbieD's Avatar
    Losing my Mom was the most difficult experience I have ever had! Diagnosed with cancer in Feb. gone in May! I knew how unhappy it would have made my Mom to think my grief over her would cause me to make bad choices for ME! So I took care of me in honor of my Mom. One thing that helped me- I thought what if my Mom had the opportunity to take the most wonderful vacation ever-everything would be PERFECTION. The only down side- I wouldn't see her for a while. Would I ever tell her she couldn't go? I feel my mother's presence with me everyday and know she is cheering me on in my journey to better health. My prayers are with you-take care of yourself!
  8. Truebody's Avatar
    My thoughts are with you at this tough time.
  9. wannabhealthy50's Avatar
    Awww sweetie, my heart breaks for you. I lost my brother to suicide in 1990, mom to COPD in 1998 and dad to diabetes, heart disease and kidney failure in 2004! We are all here for you! Mom wouldn't want you to suffer! Tell her you love her, hold her, climb in bed with her! She knows you love her!

    Now, step away from the sweets! Consider doing the 5-day reset to get yourself back on track! She needs you to be strong!
  10. brooklyn_mom's Avatar
    My heart goes out to you. And I relate to your struggle with sweets. When my favorite Aunt was dying and in hospice (too young-damn Cancer!) I totally drowned myself in brownies and fudge-and packed on 20lbs during that time.
    Try to keep sweets out of the house. I know temporarily they make you feel good-but after you eat then you feel worse about yourself and it is too easy to get out of control when there is sugar in the picture. It is a vicious cycle. Just throw the cookies away. Stay away from sweets for 2 weeks and it will get out of your system. Make sure you don't forget to eat and plan your meals. My best to you during this difficult time.
  11. lookitsabird's Avatar
    God Bless you! Watch out for the Carbs, but eat Protien, I think that helps. I will be praying, my Mom lives with me, seh will be 80 this coming week.
  12. speedracer's Avatar
    I am certain, that it was something devistating, that started my weight problem to begin with, so I most definitly concur that a revisit, of devistation will cause a problem again later on. Its almost like a mild form (super mild) of P.T.S.D.

    Hmmmm-

    Best of luck to you, keep your head up, and be aware!