Hi All -- I'm back from 2+ weeks of travel. I tried hard over the past 3 weeks to forget the stall, heal, focus on work, and be positive. I have been struggling quite a bit. I came back yesterday to find the scale hasn't moved a bit. Tomorrow is my 6th week anniversary of the surgery. I've not lost anything (in fact, I've gained) since the surgery. I've spent nearly 6 weeks at this weight; I'm heavier now than I was at my 2 week follow-up.
I hesitated even coming here at all, because reading about other people's successes is too hard. I am endlessly encouraging and will celebrate others happiness with a full heart. But this? All I see now is my own apparent failure. I can't believe I can fail at something so quickly. And YES, OMG, I am not being noncompliant. Even with weeks of being overseas. My diet is healthy. I'm active. I eat very small portions consistent with my stomach size. I carry around protein bars for small snacks. I mean, I guess everyone can do better all the time, but this is a solid month plus of no weight loss. How can I not feel like there is no hope? Is it hard to shove out of my mind the thought that nothing in this life will release me from my weight. How can I not feel that I put my body, myself, and my family through this expense and pain for an exercise in vanity that has had no impact?
Please, someone, tell me that you went MONTHS after the surgery with no weight loss? Tell me that a 6 week post-surgery stall is normal. Talk to me about getting out of it. How can I do this without extreme dieting, obsessive self-control, and starvation? Following the guidelines is clearly not working for me.
Have a mentioned that I hold MPH and PhD degrees in Public Health? That I've worked all over the world and taught and written public health curriculum for top universities all over the world? I *KNOW* how calories and weight works. I REALLY KNOW IT. My weight is a constant on my mind in my field because the healthy shape and healthy life is central in much of the field of public health. The fact that nothing I do slims me down is devastating to me; a constant embarrassment. And now I've gone this far and it still doesn't matter. I feel disgraced and humiliated from this surgery -- just like every other weight loss experience I've ever had.
I am really trying to stay positive. Does anyone have similar experiences and can give true experiences?
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