3 weeks post-op and going crazy!

[Dustinsample]

Hi all, my name is Dustin, I'm from New Mexico and I'm in my 3rd week post-op. My wife has tried to get me to join one of these groups and I've been pretty stub or about it until now. I've read some stories about how difficult post-op was/is for people and that hasn't been my experience. I've had zero trouble getting my protein and my liquid in daily, and I've only felt like it was too much one or two times. The trouble I'm having is all mental I think
I'm a recovering alcoholic/drug addict. When I got sober I leaned on food to get me through. I was 309lbs at my heaviest. I had my surgery when I was 270lbs. I think because of my addictive personality all I do is think about what I can't have, and it's making me crazy. My wife still has to eat and I always leave the room or the house so I don't have to smell it. I'm hoping this will pass as I will be able to eat soft foods pretty soon. Has anyone else had this problem? My wife is proud that I followed through with my decision to have the surgery but I've been nothing but miserable, which in turn makes her feel bad. Any and all advice is welcome.

[AnnieG]

Dustin, glad you're here. Support, as you already know, does help. We all have some weird food relationships.
I have found that doing my food prep (because then I can think about it constructively) helps - I mean, planning,, shopping, fixing.
I cannot eat a whole lot at a time (I'm almost 18 months out) - but I've learned I can always eat more later. My doc said as long as I didn't "graze", 5 small meals a day getting in my protein and water was fine.

Your taste changes over time with the VGS - at least for many of us. Things you ate before may be yuckyOther things you may not have enjoyed (like plain steamed vegetables) taste fantastical good.

Just keep asking questions!

[DebF]

Hi, Dustin,

Sounds like you have a good support system at home and now have the support of this group which I believe you will find invaluable. Wondering if you have a therapist that could also help you through any tough patches with what you called your food addiction.

I’m 5 weeks post-op and totally get it when you mention that it’s tough to smell the food your wife is cooking - I’m not necessarily hungry but the smells bring back memories of food that we always enjoyed together. One thing that really nudged me in the direction of the sleeve gastrectomy instead of the bypass was that in time I should be able to enjoy many of the same foods I enjoyed pre-sleeve (although much smaller portions). Additionally, both my husband and I have signed up for a series of local Y healthy eating seminars where people are sharing recipes and experiences with cooking in a healthier manner. No one knows that I’ve had a sleevectomy. We’re having fun and learning new healthier ways to eat and, somewhat surprisingly, loving the new foods we’re trying out! For me, I only try out very small bites of the new recipes we’re trying out and if I like it we classify it as a “keeper”. Ha!

Hang in there Dustin and keep giving yourself a pat on the back for making this momentous decision in the first place and keep reminding yourself why you did it in the first place. Best, Deb

[sraebaer]

CONGRATULATIONS on getting off the drugs and alcohol! That's an amazing accomplishment! I would guess the sleeve will be a whole lot easier than your drug/alcohol recovery. Before you know it you will be eating with your wife (just less food) and life will get back to normal. I know I was cleared for all food at 6 weeks. I think that most "newbies" don't realize healthy eating becomes a habit and is really no big deal. When we eat with others no one has a clue I had sleeve surgery. The sleeve is such an amazing tool that it keeps you from overeating. Sounds like you're off to a great start.

I agree if you are really struggling, a therapist may be a good idea. But for little things we're here to help! Best of luck to you!

[KiwiGal]

Hi Dustin and welcome.

It's great that your wife is so supportive. It's really important to have your partner on board with your decision.

I guess we have all had some sort of weird relationship with food or we wouldn't have considered surgery in the first place.
There is quite a bit to get your head around initially with a new way of eating and of course the easing back into "normal" foods. The good news is that eventually you will be able to eat most things.....just not so much of it.

My partner can't cook much and when I was doing the pre op diet I was preparing his food and sitting with him while he ate it.....and I was drinking my protein shake :-). It wasn't ideal but he needed to eat, I didn't, so we just got on with it.

He actually found it difficult, when I was back onto normal foods, to get used to me eating off a small plate. He used to feel guilty about his normal sized plate. He has got over that now :-).

Interestingly he has also changed his eating habits. He east much less and we are smarter with our buying quantities and about freezing leftovers rather than him "finishing them up".

Our changed eating habits are now our new normal and it doesn't take long to get into a new routine.

If you are open to it then perhaps a therapist would be a good idea? The surgery helps with the physical side but we need to work on our mental side too.

This forum is a good place to come too. There is lots of support and advice available so ask any questions, tell us how you are felling and/or just vent! We've all been through similar stuff.

[sraebaer]

Since I was sleeved my husband has lost about 30 pounds. So we both had to donate our entire closet! He's the chef and does amazing dinners with my made up "rule of two," a protein and veggie. Now he's passing me up on the exercise side, I have to catch up. He does crazy bike rides, like Ride Across Iowa or Ride Across Wisconsin (that one was 175 miles in a day) last year. This spring he's riding the Natchez Trace (Nashville to Mississippi) and then Ride the Rockies. I will get on my bike as soon as the weather improves, but I don't think I will be biking up the Rocky Mountains.