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  1. #1
    Gastric Sleeve Member DutchSleeve's Avatar
    Surgery date
    01/03/2017
    Surgeon
    Dr. Pablo Enriquez Valens
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Last Activity
    Today 02:15 PM
    Posts
    780
    Said "Thanks" 659 Times
    Was Thanked 626 Times in 415 Posts
    Said "Welcome to Gastric Sleeve" 249 Times
    Blog Entries
    5

    Default Women over 50: how do you feel?

    It just hit me how different I actually feel.
    Not only physically, but also mentally.

    Like it was not enough I had to deal with my changing body (gravity is a bitch, isn't it?) and menopause, I also had to deal with a body I disliked intensly.
    On the outside you would see a cheerful person, but my inside was crying.
    I was very good in hiding my true self.
    Always aiming to please people, like they would like me more that way and just maybe not notice what I looked like.

    Then my health began to deteriorate.
    All the things that come when getting older, were intensified by my weight.
    I became diabetic, my joints and back began to hurt even more, my COPD worsened.
    Something had to be done.
    Due to family challenges I had never found the right time for myself, as I was needed as a mother and wife.
    Always taking care of my families needs before mine.

    We became empty nesters.
    Finally it felt like it was my time.
    But even then I still had to deal with issues with the children.
    Still not my time.
    A couple of years ago I took matters in my own hands and decided that enough was enough.
    I was going to have my weight loss surgery, no matter what.
    The kids were doing reasonably well and did not need me.

    Again I had to deal with a changing body, but now in a completely different way.
    All the body parts that already had traveled south ended up in Antarctica...
    But I lost all of my excessive weight and some more.
    I completely lost myself and did not recognize me anymore.
    Who was I basically?
    I didn't remember.
    It had been so many years that I was that fat person, hiding in my clothes and hiding in my fat.
    All the clothes I had bought all those years were to help me to conceal myself.
    I bought what would fit me, not what I liked.

    So now I skip a year.
    Here I am, slim, fit, healthy.
    But who am I?
    Am I still the same woman I was before I got fat?
    But the last time I weighed what I weigh now, I was in my twenties.
    So absolutely not the same woman anymore.
    I had to sort of re-invent myself.
    Try to figure out who and what I was, as a person, as a mother, as a wife.
    Not an easy task, let me tell you.

    Over the last year I became a whole new person.
    I became the woman again that my husband married 43 years ago.
    He also had lost me in the process.
    We also had to find each other again.
    Our marriage had suffered too.
    I did not like my body and I could not imagine that someone else would like it.
    Fortunately he never stopped loving me.
    He never stopped loving my body.
    He loved me unconditionally.
    It was me, who could not believe that.
    It was me who became withdrawn.

    Now I skip to the present, 64 years old.
    I feel like a million bucks, both physically and mentally.
    I discovered my old and true self again.
    I was hidden in there all the time.
    I never left, I just couldn't find myself.

    And now?
    I have back my self esteem, my confidence, my style.
    I have changed back into that person from 40 years ago.
    I discovered that I could wear what I like and don't give a d... about what other people think about how I look.
    I like myself and my husband likes me even more.
    It took me some time to figure it out, but I did it!
    I am happy, I have fun, I enjoy my life.
    I have wrinkles and loose skin, so what?
    I wear my wrinkles with pride, I earned them.

    I am really proud of myself actually.
    I wanted to put this in writing, because this helps me to unravel all that has happened since the surgery.
    If you have made it reading this far: thank you!
    Thank you for giving your precious time to me.
    Thank you for being here.

    I love my faux leather jacket and my gipsy skirt.
    This is so me!

    20181122-174933.jpg
    English is not my first language, so I may and do make mistakes in my spelling, or say things oddly. Please ask me, if you want any clarifications.



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  4. #2
    Gastric Sleeve Member sraebaer's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Surgery date
    10/07/2013
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Last Activity
    Today 05:08 AM
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    Default Re: Women over 50: how do you feel?

    Love your post, and your outfit is adorable! I'm 62 next month, but feel so much younger. Just lost my mom, so my theory now is to do all hubby and I can as long as we are able to!

    I too am amazed my hubby loved me fat. He's a keeper!



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  6. #3
    Gastric Sleeve Member DutchSleeve's Avatar
    Surgery date
    01/03/2017
    Surgeon
    Dr. Pablo Enriquez Valens
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Last Activity
    Today 02:15 PM
    Posts
    780
    Said "Thanks" 659 Times
    Was Thanked 626 Times in 415 Posts
    Said "Welcome to Gastric Sleeve" 249 Times
    Blog Entries
    5

    Default Re: Women over 50: how do you feel?

    Thank you!
    Isn't it amazing how much more women our age seem to be capable of these days?
    When I remember my mother at this age, she was really "old".
    It seems 60 is the new 50.
    I mean, look at you: planning on climbing mount Kilimanjaro next year!
    English is not my first language, so I may and do make mistakes in my spelling, or say things oddly. Please ask me, if you want any clarifications.



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  8. #4
    Gastric Sleeve Member Ann2's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    Ann2
    Surgery date
    08/18/2014
    Surgeon
    n.a.
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Location
    Missouri
    Posts
    6,434
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    Said "Welcome to Gastric Sleeve" 3,570 Times
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    Default Re: Women over 50: how do you feel?

    What a great post, Dutch! And what a timely post for Americans the day after Thanksgiving. So much to be grateful for, eh?

    And what a great photo of you. I do like your outfit ... very much!

    Next month I'll turn (cough!) 73. And I feel like I did when I was 40 years old ... actually, I feel better, because I don't have ANY attention on "not fitting in" or anything like that. Frankly, I don't even think about fitting in or not -- I just go wherever I want and do whatever I want because it appeals to me.

    Like you both, my husband was ALWAYS my #1 booster. He adored me at any weight -- he just always loved me. Needless to say, I've always felt the very same way about him! So we three women are all lucky that way -- and probably in many other ways.

    One of the surprising thing about losing 100 pounds is that I look so much better at this age than I'd imagined I would. Believe me when I say that 70'ish really is the new 50. And no, of course I don't look like I did at 25, since nobody does! LOL! But jeez Louise, I'm so much smarter now than I was then.



    Consult: 235 lbs
    My and doc's preop diet: 216 -19 lbs
    M1 postop 205 -30
    M2 193 -42
    M3 184 -51
    M4 174 -61
    M5 167 -68
    M6 162 -73
    M7 156 -79
    M8 151 -84
    M9 148 -87
    M10 146 -89
    M11 144 -91
    M12 143 -92
    M13 142 -93
    M14 140 -95
    M15 139 -96
    M16 137 -98
    M17 135 -100

    First Surgiversary post

    Second Surgiversary post

    Third Surgiversary post

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  10. #5
    Gastric Sleeve Member KiwiGal's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    Lisa
    Surgery date
    09/04/2017
    Surgeon
    Stephanie Ulmer
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Last Activity
    Yesterday 03:42 PM
    Location
    Auckland New Zealand
    Posts
    596
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    Default Re: Women over 50: how do you feel?

    I love this post. So much of it resonates with me.
    Like you ladies before me my partner loved me whatever shape I was in and was/is the most supportive person in my world.
    60kg down I am half the physical woman but so much more has changed. I am happier than I have been (with myself), I am healthier, I can do so much more than I have been able to for years. I walk everywhere without even thinking about it. I am confident. I love life again!
    I'm 56 but feel 36.....well, I might if I remembered what 36 felt like ;-)
    We have gone from having 1 grand child to having 7 in a very short space of time as some have been "imported" into our lives. They are 6 boys and 1 girl ranging from 4 moths to 12 years......and they are just great......and I can keep up with them all. I used to sit down on the floor with one of the boys when he was a baby and to get up I would have to haul myself over to a chair and pull myself up. Now I just get up without even thinking about it.
    It takes time to find our place in the world when we reach a "certain age" but it takes a little more time after our surgeries.
    I think our place is a pretty good place to be!

    Thank you for being such supportive friends on this forum. I love the frank and honest advice that you offer when asked.

    You guys are the best!



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