How do you maintain your discipline over the years?

[Dutchie]

I am now 17 months out and I am entering the "danger zone".
At least, it is considered to be the danger zone and I can see why that is.
I feel comfortable with my routine, I think I "know it all" by now and I think "I got it".
There are no surprises anymore, weight-wise and food-wise.
Stopped loosing and started maintenance.
All goes well, I have not gaines one pound since a couple of months.

Maybe it goes too well?
I noticed I can eat more, a meal for me is now 6 ounces.
I still weigh myself daily, I still weigh and track my food, which is consired an bit... well... weird in my wls community.
That does not bother me one bit though, it works for me.
But I notice that I start to take the whole process for granted, if that makes sense.
And that is exactly where I slipped up all those previous times...

So: I know there are veterans out here, that still weigh themselves and their food daily.
That still track their foods daily.
But how do you maintain that discipline over all these years?
It is, after all, something we would have to do for the rest of our lives.
What do you do to motivate yourself?

[sraebaer]

Do what works for you, sounds like you have it down. I weigh myself daily, and if I'm up a pound I'm more careful the next day. I've never been a tracker, basically stick to my "rule of two," a protein and veggie at each meal. The only time I tracked was when I broke my neck a year and a half ago and was 5 pounds over goal for about a year. I joined Weight Watchers and lost 10 pretty quickly. So my goal weight moved from 140 to 135 and I'm staying there. Weight Watchers opened my eyes to foods I thought were sleeve friendly but actually were not. Now that I've learned, I'm no longer tracking. Just isn't who I am, but for many here it's what they do. That gets me back to my original advice, do what works for YOU.

What motivates me? Fitting in all my small clothes and looking cute for the 4th summer now! Being able to climb a mountain, ski, hike, kayak, basically do whatever I want. Yesterday on a bike I did some huge hills I could have never even imagined doing fat. I feel like I'm living in some sort of fantasy world and never want to go back. This summer we have three hiking/biking trips planned: Colorado, the Olympic Peninsula in Washington, and Sicaly!!

[Dutchie]

I agree, I do feel great in my smaller clothing and being able to do the physical stuff I couldn't do anymore, because of my weight.
But it feels like being healthy and thin is the "new normal".
I am not even sure that makes any sense, but it kind of feels that way.
Every time I look in the mirror I love what I see.
So that is not it.
I think it is that rush I miss, that loosing weight, those changing numbers on the scale.
This is it, this is what I have to maintain.
The challenge is gone.

I noticed I wanted to graze a couple of times.
Although I resisisted the urge once (I put the things back in the bag and put it away), I also grazed on baby carrots and slices of bell pepper a couple of times, convincing myself that those were healthy and non caloric.
Which in itself is true of course, but it still made me thinking...

[sraebaer]

I wouldn't count "grazing" as carrots and peppers, I would count that as a healthy snack. You don't have to be absolutely perfect to maintain, that's the fun of it. Trying to be perfect is like trying to diet, never worked for me. If we go out for pizza, I'll have a slice. Or a taco or whatever. While I typically don't eat bread, if I'm at a fancy restaurant with amazing bread, I'll have one piece. If I crave sweets I'll buy a few of those little 5 cent tootsie rolls and that does the trick.

While biking yesterday we rode past a restaurant that sells cinnamon rolls about the size of your head. We both laughed at how we used to eat those! Now I couldn't even imagine setting foot in that place.

[Shannon'sVSG]

"I feel comfortable with my routine, I think I "know it all" by now and I think "I got it".

Hello DutchSleeve!

I chose to utilize something you said in your post for my response, and that is...do we ever really "know it all" or "got it?"

In an ever-changing community of VSGers,I find that the more folks who undergo this procedure, the more there is to learn. Granted, there are the underlying basic principals of the procedure which we are all taught as we go through the process, but with time, focus tends to shift if ever slightly to other symptoms and problematic consumables that we should avoid so we can ensure that we are successful throughout or weight loss journey.

I understand you are 17 months post-op, and I think that is wonderful. Many congratulations to you. But personally speaking, I don't think that because we stop losing and go into the maintenance phase of weight loss that we should ever become complacent (not saying you are doing that) or that we should simply reside in a state of being. We will always be weight loss patients, and as such we need to be mindful of who we were, where we are, and of what we have become.

In any event, you are doing great! Keep up the amazing work. You are an inspiration to the newer recipients of VSG.

[Dutchie]

"I feel comfortable with my routine, I think I "know it all" by now and I think "I got it".

Hello DutchSleeve!

I chose to utilize something you said in your post for my response, and that is...do we ever really "know it all" or "got it?"

Thanks for this great question!

My answer at this point in my journey is: I don't really believe that, but it "feels" that way.
It becomes routine, and there is a risk I do become complacent.
I am still vigilant, but I want to stay that way.

You are right, I am still doing fine at maintaining my weight and I intent to continue doing that.

I still track and weigh.
I still eat very small bites and chew 20 times.
I don't drink with my meals.
I still follow all the rules religiously.

But like I said: I do notice some of my old habits are coming back, and that scares me...

[Aydensmomma]

Hello! Almost 3.5 years out. I had thought I was in maintance this past year. I was still weighing myself but in my case I was trying to gain back up to my goal weight as I had dropped below too much. Once I got back up to my original goal weight(145) I passed it and ended up gaining pretty quickly to 158. I hit 158 this past March or beginning of April. I immediately started to track again and now I'm down to 143. So my situation is a little different but it sounds to me like your doing just fine. It is easy to gain, but not nearly as easy as before the sleeve. If you notice your always eating a little more at meals then start to weigh your food again so you don't overeat and slowly stretch out your sleeve. I have a lot of restriction still but I don't weigh my food. depending on what I'm eating I'm usually done in a few bites. If you start to gain immediatly change your calorie intake or step up the exercises.

[Shannon'sVSG]

But like I said: I do notice some of my old habits are coming back, and that scares me...

I can relate to what you are saying regarding the above listed quote.

I am only 8 month post-op, and during that time my wife and I made a significant move to the midwest (with two puppies in tow.) Because we didn't feel comfortable leaving them in the car and moving truck in the dead of winter while we sat down for a meal, we found ourselves stopping at roadside eateries wherein we reluctantly consumed terrible foods. From there is was a downward spiral.

We felt out of sorts in our new town: alone and without medically supervised support. That said, we started to stray back into some of our old habits as well (something we are fighting hard to reverse as I write this.) We are doing much better now, but we now recognize how easy it is to stray from the path and find those once forgotten habits that lurk silently within the recesses of our minds.

Hang in there and remain vigilant. You can do this. You have been successful thus far. keep up the great work!

[Ann2]

Oh, Dutch! LOL!

17 months out, and you think "the challenge is gone."

The challenge is not gone. Instead, your challenge is now changing to present you with some goals you have NEVER EVER achieved before!

You're now making the transition from weight loss to living thin. From dieting to making a permanent lifestyle change. From eating (relatively) perfectly to learning how to fall off the horse and then to get right back up on the horse and giddy up again. From knowing how to (knee-jerk) hate yourself when you stumble to learning how to forgive and love yourself over and over and over again. From thinking you have won the 100-Year War to realizing you have merely won the first campaign.

Yes, all the good behaviors you learned and practiced to lose weight will support your weight maintenance going forward. But now you get to navigate waters you have probably avoided until now, which (in my experience) has been dealing with temptations and triggers you haven't been challenged by until now.

In my case, the weight-loss lessons I've learned more deeply and the new lessons I've learned during maintenance include these:

1. Staying in touch with WHY I wanted to badly to lose my excess weight.
In my case, my WLS motivation was health, mobility, participation in life and my rai·son d'ê·tre -- adventure, fun and (I'll admit it) cuteness. I do a lot of positive self-talk. It should be obvious that a lot of what I post here is self-talk. Maybe even self-hypnosis. Exercise also helps me keep in touch with my original WLS goals, so I've joined classes and made friends in those classes who would call me up and ask why I'm not coming to class if I didn't show up. I've also spent thousands of dollars on new clothes in the last three years of maintenance -- clothes I really love wearing and looking attractive in. Looking good is a big part of my new lifestyle and is a big reward for me. Sometimes (at home) I just play "dress up" in my closet and admire myself. Yes, my name is Ann, I'm 72, and I"m a big ole baby.

2. Learning how to navigate / minimize / avoid (depending on my circumstances at the moment) the effects on my body, mind and emotions of sugar and processed carbs.
Yes, I splurge on sweets occasionally. But the last three years of maintenance have taught me that when I eat too much of these unnutritious foods they really bite me in the butt. There aren't any foods I NEVER eat, but I really, really, really have had to learn that I just can't tolerate very much of some foods. And sugar is right up there at the top of that list. At this point I'm supposed to say that "Others' mileage may vary," but I really don't know ANY WLS patient who can tolerate much sugar for very long. And some can't tolerate ANY sugar. Know thyself. And respect your triggers.

3. Stop indulging or binging or overeating or whatever you want to call the behavior that conflicts with your healthy lifestyle.
Tinman says, "Never, ever overeat!" Well, he may be able to do that. But I haven't yet learned how not to never, ever overeat. I don't overeat every day. Not even every week. But sometimes (at least once a month) I do overeat. And when that happens I have to wake up the next morning, make sure I have entered all the food in My Fitness Pal, and even if it's 3,500 or 4,000, just say to myself, "That was yesterday. But this is today." The more I do this, the easier it is to not overeat for more than one day.

4. Using others to help me be accountable for my weight/fitness/lifestyle.
For the last four years I've seen a therapist at least once a month. He helps me be accountable to myself. To be clear, I'm accountable to myself, not him. But he would certainly call me out if he saw me gaining weight. I now dress up when I leave the house (including the feed store -- I have some very cute denim overalls and boots!) and others now expect me to show up looking good; that's another way I hold myself accountable.

5. Continuing to track my weight, food, and exercise.
Almost four years out I'm still tracking all of this daily on My Fitness Pal. This isn't everybody's thing. But it's mine. I don't know anyone who tracks daily who has had a serious problem with regain. And I know lots of people who stopped tracking years ago (or never did) who have regained a lot of weight. Just sayin'. Your mileage may vary.

Those are some thoughts for now. Everyone's mileage may vary. What works for me won't NECESSARILY work for you. Or it might. The one thing I do know is that your challenge is definitely not over. Not by a long, long shot.

[Dutchie]

You make me smile Ann2!
My challenge is not over by a long shot...

I am going to read and reread your answer, I will respond to it later, but just wanted to let you know I've seen it.

[Ann2]

Thanks, Dutch.; )

BTQ, are you still in Morocco?

[mellowjoy]

DutchSleeve, I totally understand your concerns about complacenty. That feeling got me in trouble every time I lost weight pre sleeve surgery. I would lose and felt like some miracle would keep me slim without me putting in any effort. I would then gain all the weight back.

I'm 3.5 years post op, maintaining my weight loss, and working to stay there each day. I weigh daily, weigh my food daily, track my food (MF Pal) and I track every bite (good, bad, ugly), and I plan my meal. I exercise daily.

What helps me stay motivated, I don't want to go back to where I was post op. Everyday during my weight loss I planned what I would do when I got to my goal weight. I'd never made that plan before because I expected a miracle to keep me slim. There are no miracles and I don't know anyone who has maintained their weight loss without working at it.

A good example is I had a friend who had WLS before me. When she saw how I was tracking, exercising, and weighing my food she commented she was lucky she didn't have to do all that to lose weight. Now 4 years out, she's gained back more than 1/2 of her weight because she never took time to learn the basics.

Studies show that people that participate in support groups do better than those who don't. I participate on MyFitnessPal, Facebook, and here. I also attend my monthly support groups provided by my doctor's office. I continually learn something new that is helping me keep the weight off.

As others above have stated, find out what works for you. Never give up on learning something new that will help you maintain your weight loss and improve your health.

[Stacey03]

So much good advice. Sounds like you are doing all the useful things Dutchie. Love these posts because I learn so much :-)

[Dutchie]

Here I am, with my twoo feet back on the ground again.
What was I thinking?

Let me adress some of the answers...
Hi Edie!
Yes I am still doing all the right things, and I feel that has provided me with a strong foundation.
Meaning, that by now I can try new things, things I have avoided up to now.
Frankly, that scares the heck out of me.
But I did try to eat icecream again (yuck, too sweet for my taste), MacD. French fries (they really were the best, weren't they?), I only tasted the fat, so no succes there.
Every once in a while we have (what we call) movie time and I will make popcorn (yummie!), so I am incorporating other things into my diet.
Not much of them, but I do.
So far, so good.

Thank you Mellowjoy, for sharing your thoughts on this.
You are right, there is actually no time for complacency, we still will have to work hard.
I don't know many people, who still track and weigh themselves and their foor every day.
I still do, and (certainly after all this advice) will continue to do so.
I also have a dear friend, who had wls before me.
She actually was the one, that told my to stick to the rules for the first 1,5 years, so that I had a solid foundation and learned a new eating pattern.
Sadly enough, for her that advice did not work and she regaines a lot.
So guess what?
Now she is telling me to loosen up...
The support groups you mentioned are very important, I agree 100%.
Due to our traveling lifestyle I have my support groups online, one is more helpful than the other, but they still provide a lot of information and I still learn every day.

Dear Ann2, you crack me up!
I can picture you, looking cute in your overalles and boots!

But there is (of course) some really good advice:
I AM NOT DONE YET!
I have to repeat that to myself over and over again, because I think that is the essence of what we are doing.
This is the new lifestyle we have to maintain for the rest of our lives.
And when I think that over: that means we will never be "done".
Which is actually a good thing, because that is what will keep me focused.

I will have to learn the navigation thing.
But I know (and respect) my triggers very well.
So that is a big plus.
And I will have to learn to eat "perfectly" 80% of the time and give myself room for that other 20% to eat something, that is not necesarilly nutricious, but just very yummie.
I am still doing 100% perfect.
Really, I am, but it comes naturally to me by now.

Which brings me to Susan, who is eating and enjoying her pizza slices and taco.
I still have not eaten that, because frankly, I am afraid I will not stop...
I admire you for being able to eat those things and still maintain your wls lifestyle.
But I would love to do that some time, that will be a whole new challenge, the other 20%.

Like Aydensmomma said, I will have to keep monitoring the results and adjust accordingly.

Now for some self analysis (I am actually pretty good in that fornulately):
What is my biggest fear right now?
- that I will take things for granted and become complacent.

Do I really think that will happen?
- actually, no, not for some time. I am very comfortable right now with what I do and how I do it.

Am I up for the challenge of the other 20%?
- Maybe, but I am afraid to try...

Why am I afraid to try?
- Wow... good question... I think it comes down to: I am afraid to fail.

What do I think would happen, when I failed?
- I would regain.

Do I believe I will fail?
- I might, it has happened to me before.

Does that mean it will happen again?
- Of course not! This is a whole new ballgame, with new rules. I know those rules very well, I use them every day.

How about the years to come?
- I will cross that bridge when I get to that.

So: what can I do for myself, to help me to do the other 20% and not fail and feel comfortable doing so?
- what I am doing right now: weigh myself daily, weigh my food, track my food, drink my water at the appropriate times, take my vitamins, do my exercise.
I actually bought myself a really cute bariatric utensil set (small fork, knife and spoon) to help me take small bites, and a cute little insulated stainlesss steel bowl to eat from, that will keep my food warm for a long period of time.

Bring on the new challenge!
Do I feel ready for it? Not really, but I think I never will feel ready, so why not start now?
I never backed out of a challenge, I am a strong personality, I can do this.
I am scared, yes, but I have never let fear stand in my way.
Tonight I will have some of that marvellous french baguette, I just bought for my DH.
Start small...

Ann2?
We have left Morocco, we will go back there the end of this year.
We are currently in Normandy, France, where we visit the D-day beaches, where the American and Allied troups landed in WW2.
Complete with visits to the American and Canadian War Cemeteries.
Very impressive, we've been here a lot of times, but it still gets to me, how many very young men have died here for the liberation of Europe.
Lest we forget...

[Ann2]

See! You do know what to do.

Seriously, Ms. Dutch, that post is brilliant. You're such a smart cookie. And you are going to continue to do great--it's obvious from that dance you're doing on that fine line between confidence and respect.

This is such a Big Adventure, isn't it?