My New Life

[Mohawk]

Hello, i am new to the forum. I had surgery 18 days ago and am having some tough days. I feel very lonely and and depressed. I know part of this is because I can’t eat like I used. Food was my best friend. I am single and a very private person so this is difficult for me but i desperately need some support.

[Alynn]

Mohawk,

Welcome! You have to take it one day at a time. You will find the folks here very supportive, helpful and understanding. We are all on this journey together.

Blessings!

A

[Dutchie]

Welcome Mohawk.
Good for you for reaching out.
We all need support and some tlc.
You just had your surgery and your hormones are all over the place right now.
Hang in there, it will get better!

Don't hesitate to ask questions you may have.
There is much wisdom to be found here.

[Ann2]

Mohawk, welcome!

Are you able to get out of the house to walk some? I bet that would help you feel better gradually.

There's so much research that says just nodding to people on the street (without even speaking to them) can qualify as "socializing" and offer the endorphin lift that people who live alone need so much.

And this sounds goofy as hell, but it's also supported by good research: If you smile (simply raise the corners of your mouth) your brain will respond by producing the kind of biochemical response that improves your mood. Here's an article that describes how that works:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...-in-your-smile

BTW, you're in the rough part of the recovery program -- the first few weeks are hard for most people.

Finally, any chance that (if you're not already seeing a therapist) you could start to do so? FYI, I've been seeing a therapist since pre-WLS, and it has been a tremendous benefit to me. Frankly, I think most of us would benefit from psychological support of this nature, given all the many mental, emotional, behavioral, and physical changes we cycle through post-op.

Very best to you!

[Lisa73me]

Hello, i am new to the forum. I had surgery 18 days ago and am having some tough days. I feel very lonely and and depressed. I know part of this is because I can’t eat like I used. Food was my best friend. I am single and a very private person so this is difficult for me but i desperately need some support.

This too shall pass! I felt that way at first too, but now every time I look at how small my clothes are or I look in the mirror, I love my decision more and more. It gets better, find something else you enjoy to replace eating... Hugs!

[cowgirljane]

I have to admit - my first few months post op were very emotionally.... odd. I felt a sense of emptiness, a sense of not being myself. My sense of taste went sideways, so even when I could eat food, I didn't like it very much. After a few months, I started feeling better and as the weight loss really kicked in - I felt great. I view it as part of the process for some of us.

Then, with all the weight loss, big emotional changes happen again. Years later, I can say life is MUCH better, in spite of some rough times.

I know you are a private person, but perhaps 1:1 counseling would be a comfortable place to share and talk through these emotions? Hang in there - it really does get better!

[Mohawk]

Thank you everyone for the encouragement.

[knp76]

I am only 7 weeks out from my surgery. I know though how hard those first few weeks are. I too felt depressed and not myself. I have started feeling better the last week or so. I go to a weekly support group that is part of the bariatric practice I go to. I also see a therapist one on one. I find both of these helpful. I struggled with depression prior to surgery and I think the hormonal changes that occur made things worse. I wish I had some great sage advice but I am early in my journey and still trying to figure things out. I live alone too and that sometimes adds to my sense of isolation. I wish you the best on your journey.

[Mohawk]

Thank you for the encouragement and best of luck to you on your journey also.

[Christie13]

Hey Mohawk. I get it. I was very private about my surgery and only told a few close friends and immediate family. I didn't miss food, though. I can tell you that this forum is so helpful to speak with others who are going through what you are going through. It is wonderful way to connect with others. Although I had support of my few close friends and family that knew, it was not the same as talking to other sleevers. Wishing you much success and hoping you will stick around and get to know the group. It is a great place for support and friendship.

[Christie13]

PS- You will eventually be able to eat again and socializing will be more normal.

[Mohawk]

Thank you

[ghost_ryder]

Mo, this is a great group to be part of. You can be a keyboard hero in your own right. There are lots of good friendly people here who can answer your questions and provide encouragement. So make yourself at home.

[sraebaer]

Every day gets better! I second the people who are recommending therapy. I never got depressed (just giddy and thrilled and excited about losing weight) but my psychiatrist said many people suffer depression after surgery. Seek help.

[simplyseahorse]

Hi there and welcome! I can only imagine, because I have not yet had the surgery, what you are going through. It will be hard for me as well because I have always used food for comfort and when bored or as a reward system - basically any reason. That is why I searched out group support online early, and I am glad you are here too!