Telling family

[viventi]

The only people I've told are my mother, father, grandmother and my boyfriend. All of whom have been very supportive.

The one whom I was most worried about was my boyfriend. I went over it in my head for WEEKS, what I was going to say and when would be a good time. One night while we were just jumping into bed I just randomly brought it up. He was all for it especially after I explained how much it would help my HEALTH, not so much my looks, that part is obvious - about how happy I would be, etc. Cancer, diabetes, heart disease and joint issues run in my family, I'm trying to avoid all that. My surgery is in February and I can NOT wait!

Like others have said, only tell who really matters. This BIL obviously doesnt matter much right now

[Stacey03]

Congrats on making this decision for your health, I'm sure you won't regret it for a second. Exciting times coming up ��

[becker2]

I feel that a large part of the issue of non supporters is that they aren't sure how to deal with the upcoming "new you". They don't know what to expect, and how your success will affect their relationship with you. They can't process all of this, and so they just become very negative to protect their own feelings. Sometimes, they just need time. I am fortunate. I have a good support system. I have not tried to hide the fact that I had WLS from anyone, and I really don't care how other people feel about it. I took charge of my health and my life by using sound medical technology. So I proudly share that I was sleeved with anyone who compliments me on my weight loss. Throughout this entire process, I have spent much time working on "me". I decided early on that I was not willing to trade the freedom from obesity with the burden of keeping the surgery a secret for the rest of my life. Also, I feel that maybe sharing my experience could help someone else with their own WLS decision, and hopefully by openly talking about WLS more we can erase some of the stigma associated with it. Bottom line..... do what is right for you and hold your head high.

[simplyseahorse]

I told my mom because she lives with me, and um, she would notice. Also she has had the lap band. Interestingly, she did not think I should get the sleeve - she still doesn't. She thinks I should get the lap band and use HER doctor. I don't want the band - and I am comfortable with my surgeon. I have read too much about the band slipping, eroding, etc. All that said, she is supportive of my decision to do something about my weight because she has been telling me I am so pretty - if I would just lose weight. This from a woman to has dieted her entire life and now has COPD so can't eat enough to get her calorie needs met.

Otherwise, I have told a selected few. Told my boss because another co-worker had the same surgery - and because I need him to work with me for the time off because I have not been here a year yet. Told 2 close friends I work with. Told 2 other friends in town. Not sure what I will tell people when they start to notice my weight loss - probably that I have drastically changed my eating habits and started being more active - both of which will be true with the omission of the surgery.

I figure it this way - people who haven't struggled with weight to the point that we have CAN'T understand. You don't think about how uncomfortable it is to sit in a plane until you have been squeezed against the window trying to keep from spilling over onto the next person. I have been scared to have to fly - hoping that I could avoid it because this time I might need the seatbelt extension. People don't understand what it feels like to not fit in the bathtub. To decide what car to buy because of whether you fit in it comfortably or not. I guess it is not their fault and I wouldn't wish it on them - but don't expect them to be able to understand. They haven't dealt with it. People should want the best for their friends and loved ones, but sometimes they don't, they are jealous, or they just don't think about how they are coming across. Hugs.

[pugtato]

I've only told my immediate family.. Fiancé (well, obviously ), mom, dad, step dad, grandmother.

My mother isn't happy with my decision and to be honest, although she's been a bit heavy for as long as I can remember she's never been morbidly obese like me. She doesn't know what it's like I suppose, and I feel as if she might try and talk me out of it. I've already told her oh well it's not your decision, but talking to your mother like that always makes you feel bad in the end :/ the surgery will happen, just with a bit of guilt for my mother and a ton of happiness for myself.

[Christie13]

The only people I've told are my mother, father, grandmother and my boyfriend. All of whom have been very supportive.

The one whom I was most worried about was my boyfriend. I went over it in my head for WEEKS, what I was going to say and when would be a good time. One night while we were just jumping into bed I just randomly brought it up. He was all for it especially after I explained how much it would help my HEALTH, not so much my looks, that part is obvious - about how happy I would be, etc. Cancer, diabetes, heart disease and joint issues run in my family, I'm trying to avoid all that. My surgery is in February and I can NOT wait!

Like others have said, only tell who really matters. This BIL obviously doesnt matter much right now

OMG yes!!! I did not tell my husband until AFTER I had my first visit with my surgeon's office and officially started the pre op requirements for insurance. I went home and told him I had to tell him something. I think he was worried I was going to say I was leaving him or having an affair because I had such a hard time getting it out. Once I finally did he seemed relieved and then said, "If you are doing this for me don't because I love you just the way you are." I blurted out, "I am doing this for me!" (Which kind of shocked me.) And then he told me he was 100% behind me. He went with me for surgery and took great care of me afterwards. He has since joined in on my healthy lifestyle and lost 45 lbs himself from eating healthy and running with me.

[Ann2]

OMG yes!!! I did not tell my husband until AFTER I had my first visit with my surgeon's office and officially started the pre op requirements for insurance. I went home and told him I had to tell him something. I think he was worried I was going to say I was leaving him or having an affair because I had such a hard time getting it out. Once I finally did he seemed relieved and then said, "If you are doing this for me don't because I love you just the way you are." I blurted out, "I am doing this for me!" (Which kind of shocked me.) And then he told me he was 100% behind me. He went with me for surgery and took great care of me afterwards. He has since joined in on my healthy lifestyle and lost 45 lbs himself from eating healthy and running with me.

DAMN! I love this story, Christie! I love everything about it!

[Stacey03]

DAMN! I love this story, Christie! I love everything about it!

Innit. *smile* :-)

[Christie13]

DAMN! I love this story, Christie! I love everything about it!

Thanks Ann. I think the surprising part was when I blurted it out because really I was doing it for me. For once...it was all about me and I was not ashamed to admit it. And tomorrow we do our half marathon. And now we are signing up for a Tough Mudder in May!!! It is so much fun to be active with your spouse/significant other.