I'm Finding My Voice...

[DesertGal]

I do not like confrontations. Never have. I began speaking up years ago when it pertained to my daughter when she was born having Down syndrome. If you don't speak up and advocate for your special needs child (children), NO ONE WILL.
With that said....

I needed to go have MORE blood work this morning for my primary care physician. I did my first labs 3 weeks ago for my surgeon to check for vitamin deficiencies. These were on the orders for today as well, but I didn't have them test those because I just had them done (I will give my pcp the results, I have already printed out, when I see her in 2 weeks). Our insurance wouldn't be thrilled having to pay for the same tests only weeks a part anyway.... if they paid them at all for a second time.

So I get in the room and the tech has my orders and sees that a couple are crossed off (and the reason for them being left off) and she asked me "Girl, what HAVE you been doing to yourself?" (as in why SO many different tests AND why checking on vitamin deficiencies). She's drawn my blood before but doesn't know me.

I told her I had weight loss surgery, that's why the testing for the vitamin B-12, D. She then said "Oh... a lot of people look down on those who have weight loss surgery, cause it's like you guys took the easy way out." Easy? My ass! I immediately said those words to her. I told her this was one of the hardest things I did in my life (acknowledging that my fat ass needed HELP to get healthy again), and that this was not an easy decision because it's not a cake-walk! To knowingly say to a surgeon "Yeah, go for it. Remove most of my stomach", isn't something I thought I would ever utter to anyone. To realize that your way of eating for years (no matter the cause or reason) has GOT TO completely change because your life depends on it, is hard to do. I told her this is not something one takes lightly- it's a PERMANENT fact of life- and I find it offensive that people think this way, without even knowing all the facts ABOUT the dang surgery.

She didn't say a whole lot afterwards, but I let her know how I felt. Another victory.

[knp76]

Good for you! I will never understand people's need to talk about things they know nothing about.

[Linda51]

You go girl! I'm not sure I would have been as brave as you were, but I hope would be.

[Luv49ers19]

I hate to admit it but I too once thought (years ago) that surgery was the easy way out. After doing all the research and not being able to lose anything on my own I had a change of heart. When my dr first suggested wls I was so scared. Now through all the hard work and commitment to my new life I wouldn't change a thing! This is hard as help but I'm worth it! We all are worth it!!!

[DesertGal]

We ARE all worth it, Cody. You are right!

Some people, for whatever reason, will say whatever it is that comes into their mind! I met one woman at the gym who ACTUALLY thought having weight loss surgery was an abdominoplasty! (I didn't tell her I had it.) Had NO inkling that the two are completely different SURGERIES! She said that people who have the WLS should just do sits up and crunches and the fat around the waist will shrink down. I asked exactly what she meant? Was she talking about having excess stomach fat removed OR having your actual stomach cut away to restrict the size and limit of what that organ can hold. She looked at me like I was from the moon? She said "To make your stomach (waist) smaller in inches. People do it all the time". Oh for the love of God....

[PokerGuy]

Sorry to disagree but the Sleeve and bypass surgery IS THE EASY WAY OUT. You took it , I took it, we all took it. Fighting to lose weight by yo yo dieting and working out is the hardest way. Most of us tried the hard way and did not succeed so we took the easy way and had surgery.

[BanillaVean]

Sorry to disagree but the Sleeve and bypass surgery IS THE EASY WAY OUT. You took it , I took it, we all took it. Fighting to lose weight by yo yo dieting and working out is the hardest way. Most of us tried the hard way and did not succeed so we took the easy way and had surgery.

Yours is certainly a different perspective, particularly on this board. I appreciate your honesty though. I am not quite 2 months out yet so I am still new to all of this but I can say it has been rather easy for me so far. I do have to make a conscious effort to get in enough fluids and protein but I have not had to battle with overeating. Not sure what the future will hold in that respect.

Having said that, I did not make this decision without much thought and research. I was blessed with no complications and an easy recovery.

[Ann2]

What the actual fuck?!

Who cares if WLS is the easy way out. It is definitely the SMART way out -- IF you're willing to go through all the lifestyle changes you explained to that goofball. But that's not the point. Your phlebotomist is an idiot, saying something critical and demeaning like that to a patient. Good for you on giving her a piece of your mind.

And now, if you're so inclined, you get to file a complaint against her ass for saying what she said to you.

I swear, some people who work in medical fields (including MDs) have NO IDEA how they should treat their patients or the impacts their verbal diarrhea can have. I can just imagine what she blathers on about to other patients with other diagnoses? Jeez, Louise!

[bigdogluver]

Good for you, Lori. I've prepared myself for something like that happening, but it hasn't happened, yet. I keep telling people that ask me about it, that they shouldn't do it unless they REALLY are serious. It ain't for whimps! Plus, eventually, you still have to watch what you eat, just like being on a diet. Many of the folks I talk to all back away and say they rather not do surgery. They want to eat what they want to eat when they want to eat. I prefer to be healthy, happy, and fit instead of being able to pig out.

WLS is a journey for the brave.

[Marinewife]

Holy hell!!! I'm not looking forward to such comments. And believe me, they will come. Living on a military base full of young snotty military wives, there will be plenty! Not sure how I'm going to handle the comments. It ought to be interesting.

[sraebaer]

Thanks for standing up for us all!

[Christie13]

I want to "love" your post, not just say "thanks" for it!!! Her nasty little attitude is why I am very selective about who I tell. My PCP's staff all know and they are all very wonderful and supportive. I love that about them. Not one has ever looked down on me and they always compliment me and ask me how things are going. If they were negative, I would change PCP. I am only going to surround myself with positive people. I have no issues dropping someone like a bad habit!! Way to go Lori!! You are awesome!

[Ann2]

Holy hell!!! I'm not looking forward to such comments. And believe me, they will come. Living on a military base full of young snotty military wives, there will be plenty! Not sure how I'm going to handle the comments. It ought to be interesting.

Then why in the world would you tell any of them about having WLS?

Many WLS patients are completely on the down low. I am. And it has been such a safe way to deal with all the issues I've dealt with in the last 3 years. Why go through all of that stuff "on stage and in public"? It's not required.

[RehabNurse]

Many WLS patients are completely on the down low.

Yep...the only people in the world who had initially known of my surgery were my parents (who lived out of state) and my best friend. That's it.

The less people who know that you've had bariatric surgery, the merrier your life will be...

[Marinewife]

I've only told a few close friends and some family. I have seen people I know in my classes, and my neighbor is in the same program as me. It's like a very very small town on this base. People talk, it is what it is. I don't offer up the information, but it's hard to hide it when you have classes together. I'm just hoping I can handle the comments with grace is all.