The comments have started

[Belle2]

I am 6 pounds from goal at 11 months out. I definitely want to reach 150 and am trying to be more consistent with my exercise. My sister in-law told someone that she is concerned about me, because I am getting "too skinny." I am proud of myself for not letting it get to me emotionally. I felt defensive for a second but it quickly left my mind. I was prepared for it! I knew that it would happen at some point nearing my goal. I taught myself a good lesson: it really does work to be prepared. Plan how you will handle situations that will be coming up, because at some point they will.

[Shirl]

Hey Belle2, I am not sleeved yet, but will be in a few days. What you said struck a chord with me because every time I was successful at losing weight I got similar comments, and I feel now that I let those comments get to me. Reflecting back I was insecure perhaps seeking approval, validation and wanting to belong. I also can clearly see that those people who made me feel bad for doing something for myself was because of their own issues. I think I am better prepared today to overcome whatever negative or judging comments come my way. I know that my health will be better than if I had stayed obese. I know I will be able to do more because of my decision to be a healthier and leaner version of me. Thanks again for helping me reflect on this before surgery.

[p.charles]

Ahhh, yes. The comments have started with me as well. I just laugh at it, really. No one else's opinion of me supersedes my own. I feel too good about myself to allow anyone to rain on my parade with negative talk. Unless my doctor is concerned, I could care less who thinks I've gotten too skinny. In one ear and out the other, it goes.

[thicknsweet]

Good for you! I hope to be able to say the same thing next year!!

[Pam G]

I am 6 pounds from goal at 11 months out. I definitely want to reach 150 and am trying to be more consistent with my exercise. My sister in-law told someone that she is concerned about me, because I am getting "too skinny." I am proud of myself for not letting it get to me emotionally. I felt defensive for a second but it quickly left my mind. I was prepared for it! I knew that it would happen at some point nearing my goal. I taught myself a good lesson: it really does work to be prepared. Plan how you will handle situations that will be coming up, because at some point they will.

I cannot imagine anyone ever saying that about ME! LOL

I have seen people who've lost weight look worse than they did when they were a little chubbier, esp older people. We don't have as much subcutaneous fat so our faces look more gaunt and drawn in and our dry skin hangs on our bones. Again, I can't imagine ever being like that, but who knows? maybe one day.

But I'll be prepared for it now that you brought it up. One "benefit" of being older is that there aren't that many people still around (like parents, grandparents, etc) that knew us growing up obese and what our "old selves" looked like.

[Belle2]

Jayme, Patrice, and Shirl. I'm glad I could help someone with my experience. Thanks for your responses. It's nice to share our experiences and learn from one another.

Pam: I agree with you about being older. Fortunately my skin is very resilient. I have spent enough on Estee Lauder since I was 18 that I could buy a luxury car. I was very round faced with the excess weight. I naturally have a longer narrow face, so I was so happy to get my face back. lol I think a lot of it is that some of these people have only seen my larger. I am also aware of skin hanging on bones, and don't want to look like that. I am not even close to that so they just haven't seen me at goal. I love seeing my cheek and jaw bones. Heck, I didn't know for sure that I had any bones under my fat anymore. I remember the first time my daughters saw my chest bones. They said OMG mom, look at your bones. I said, ya it's been years since you've seen them hasn't it? I'm too happy to let their opinion take away any of my joy. Oh, if I had only known that decades ago. I really did it for myself this time.

[Numbers]

I find most of the comments I get are genuine, people see us loose a ton of weight and are concerned. I find it a sign of the amount of people who truly care about me. I am grateful for that. I generally tell them I had weight loss surgery 18 months or so ago and feel GREAT. Then we move on the next topic.

[WANAGL]

Ahhh, yes. The comments have started with me as well. I just laugh at it, really. No one else's opinion of me supersedes my own. I feel too good about myself to allow anyone to rain on my parade with negative talk. Unless my doctor is concerned, I could care less who thinks I've gotten too skinny. In one ear and out the other, it goes.

I love this!

I have standard replies:

"Thanks for your input." and "Perhaps."

Those stop people in their tracks!

[Belle2]

Standard replies work for me too. I had several canned responses to use throughout my journey. Prior to surgery, post surgery, and through this first year I pull one of them out when needed. It has really helped me to be prepared when I get a negative remark. It was just part of the preparation I made, on the road to success.

[sasweet1]

Me too, thicknsweet!!

[Alaska Girl B]

Could you share a list of your canned response, they would really be a huge help to many.
Thanks, Alaska Girl B

[Pam G]

yesterday, I was asked why I was eating all those "mushy things" (I'm on the pre-op liquid diet)....I was eating an applesauce! I said, "what? you don't eat applesauce?"

[sasweet1]

Ha!! Perfect!!

[shparks]

My sister in-law told someone that she is concerned about me, because I am getting "too skinny."

Oh. I was expecting this thread to be about positive comments.

[srgilleland]

Before surgery people would comment that "if you only ate better and exercised more, you wouldn't need this surgery". But they don't know me and the struggles I've been through. Those same people that are seeing my early results (3 weeks post-op) still look at me a little down their noses. But the true genuine people do care, make positive comments. I remind myself that I've done this for myself, and my opinion is the only one that matters.