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  1. #1
    Gastric Sleeve Member lugo1815's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    Luis G
    Surgery date
    01/08/2015
    Surgeon
    Dr. Sergio Quinones
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Last Activity
    12-13-2015 12:38 AM
    Location
    Orlando, FL
    Posts
    26
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    Was Thanked 6 Times in 5 Posts
    Said "Welcome to Gastric Sleeve" 3 Times

    Default Interesting observation

    My wife brought up an interesting point yesterday. My wife woke up extra early yesterday and prompted me to get up so we can go to breakfast. I looked at her as if she was crazy and she quickly realized what she was asking me. I am about to have my sleeve on the 8th so I have been on a pre-op liquid diet for about 1 week and two days. She decided to hit Dillards and catch an early morning sale. When she returned she pointed out that our relationship is going to go through a huge shift. I asked why and she went on to remind me that food has really been the center of all our communication.

    We typically have family at the house (live in Florida and most of our family are from NYC) and when she and I need to talk and make some decisions, we typically do it during breakfast, lunch or dinner and most of the time that it outside the house. I guess she wanted to discuss somethings during breakfast. That was an eye opening moment for me because she was absolutely right. We talked about it and decided that we will now do other things like perhaps head down to the promenade in my town and walk or go to a park and sit and enjoy nature and talk.

    I just wanted to mention that here because some much of what I read is about our individual experience. I yet to come across a post reflecting on the day to day with our loved ones.

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  4. #2
    Gastric Sleeve Member char602's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    Charletta
    Surgeon
    N/A
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Last Activity
    11-27-2015 11:16 AM
    Location
    WA State
    Posts
    573
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    Blog Entries
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    Default Re: Interesting observation

    Good post Luis. You're right, getting sleeved definitely has an impact on our loved ones. It's also an eye opener on how much our lives can be focused around food/eating. You will eventually be able to enjoy restaurants with your spouse. But in the interim, you will have time to develop some other healthy routines or activities together.

    It will be the same for my husband and I, because we go out to breakfast to discuss big decisions and we go to happy hour at least twice a week.
    I'm blessed in the fact that my husband really likes walks, hikes and bike riding. So I am content with the idea, ecstatic is more like it, that while he will be losing his drinking buddy, he will be gaining so much more.

    She thought she could......so she did!


  5. #3
    Gastric Sleeve Member KarenJean's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    KarenJean
    Surgery date
    12/09/2014
    Surgeon
    Dr. Loggins
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Last Activity
    03-28-2015 09:25 AM
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    365
    Said "Thanks" 14 Times
    Was Thanked 58 Times in 53 Posts
    Said "Welcome to Gastric Sleeve" 3 Times

    Default Re: Interesting observation

    Yes, same shift here. We're so used to celebrating, relaxing, rewarding, and bonding over a good restaurant meal, that the change is disconcerting. Still finding ways to replace that "couples time."


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  7. #4
    Gastric Sleeve Member Terps's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    Kristen
    Surgery date
    06/18/2014
    Surgeon
    Dr. Almanza
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Last Activity
    05-09-2015 01:50 PM
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    820
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    Blog Entries
    10

    Default Re: Interesting observation

    It definitely becomes a family affair. I am blessed with an incredible husband who supports me unconditionally. At this point, we are able to go out to eat together. And I'm beginning to appreciate our time together and conversation as the focal point, rather than the food.



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  9. #5
    Gastric Sleeve Member joatsaint's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Surgery date
    12/27/2012
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Last Activity
    12-06-2020 01:10 PM
    Location
    Beaumont, TX
    Posts
    75
    Said "Thanks" 0 Times
    Was Thanked 15 Times in 15 Posts
    Said "Welcome to Gastric Sleeve" 137 Times

    Default Re: Interesting observation

    I went through something similar. My best friend and I eat out every Sat night. He assumed that those days were over after my surgery. I told him, no, I would just be eating waaaayyyyy less. I told him I was going out for the company, not for the food and it didn't matter to me that I'd never be getting my money's worth at a buffet ever again. It's worked out well.
    Check out my Youtube channel I answer your most Frequently Asked Questions
    http://www.youtube.com/user/Frankensleeve/videos



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  11. #6
    Gastric Sleeve Member Jiffy's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Surgery date
    12/01/2014
    Surgeon
    Dr. Chae
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Last Activity
    06-14-2016 06:18 AM
    Posts
    101
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    Said "Welcome to Gastric Sleeve" 45 Times
    Blog Entries
    1

    Default Re: Interesting observation

    Same for my hubby and I, out to eat was a favorite thing to do, Thank God he's such a huge support and completely understands. Our relationship is the best - I'm so blessed to be married to him.



  12. #7
    Gastric Sleeve Member Sunshine25's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    Jackie
    Surgery date
    11/26/2013
    Surgeon
    Dr. Sergio Quinones
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Location
    Vancouver B.C Canada
    Posts
    105
    Said "Thanks" 46 Times
    Was Thanked 10 Times in 10 Posts
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    Default Re: Interesting observation

    Only the really strong relationships last the first year after the sleeve. It is an EMMENSE lifestyle change, if you have genuine support, unconditional love, you guys will totally succeed.



  13. #8
    Gastric Sleeve Member Ann2's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    Ann2
    Surgery date
    08/18/2014
    Surgeon
    n.a.
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Location
    Missouri
    Posts
    6,630
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    Default Re: Interesting observation

    Smart cookies -- both of you.

    You're going to do just fine.

    Welcome.



    Consult: 235 lbs
    My and doc's preop diet: 216 -19 lbs
    M1 postop 205 -30
    M2 193 -42
    M3 184 -51
    M4 174 -61
    M5 167 -68
    M6 162 -73
    M7 156 -79
    M8 151 -84
    M9 148 -87
    M10 146 -89
    M11 144 -91
    M12 143 -92
    M13 142 -93
    M14 140 -95
    M15 139 -96
    M16 137 -98
    M17 135 -100

    First Surgiversary post

    Second Surgiversary post

    Third Surgiversary post

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  15. #9
    Gastric Sleeve Member lugo1815's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    Luis G
    Surgery date
    01/08/2015
    Surgeon
    Dr. Sergio Quinones
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Last Activity
    12-13-2015 12:38 AM
    Location
    Orlando, FL
    Posts
    26
    Said "Thanks" 1 Times
    Was Thanked 6 Times in 5 Posts
    Said "Welcome to Gastric Sleeve" 3 Times

    Default Re: Interesting observation

    Thank you! Jan 26th is our 10th year wedding anniversary but we have been together for 12 years. She was a friend before we started dating and frankly I am doing this because I want to be around many more years. When I went to see the therapist about the surgery I was told the same thing. I guess when your looks change and there is new found attention added to changes in communication, the end result can lead to separation.

    I have no doubt we will be ok because she has been a pillar of support throughout this entire process. Fortunately, she does not suffer from obesity and is in pretty good shape. If anyone has had any reason to be insecure over the last 12 years, it would have been me. Like so many here, I am so blessed to have such a supportive spouse and family.

  16. #10
    Gastric Sleeve Member Ms. Jupiter's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Last Activity
    08-15-2016 08:33 PM
    Location
    Pacific Northwest
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    255
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    Blog Entries
    8

    Default Re: Interesting observation

    We went through the same thing. It was/is a major adjustment. My wonderful hubby is 5'7 & 145lbs. One of those people who can stay the same weight without trying. We also had to come up with new things to do.
    We like to go bowling. We also have kids so it makes a great night out for all of us.
    We also play a lot of board games together, which is always fun too.
    Congratulations.


  17. #11
    Gastric Sleeve Member Ms. Jupiter's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Last Activity
    08-15-2016 08:33 PM
    Location
    Pacific Northwest
    Posts
    255
    Said "Thanks" 98 Times
    Was Thanked 71 Times in 62 Posts
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    Default Re: Interesting observation

    Love this!
    Quote Originally Posted by Sunshine25 View Post
    Only the really strong relationships last the first year after the sleeve. It is an EMMENSE lifestyle change, if you have genuine support, unconditional love, you guys will totally succeed.


  18. #12
    Gastric Sleeve Member Lee6Lee's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Surgery date
    04/22/2014
    Surgeon
    Dr. Elias Ortiz
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Last Activity
    02-20-2024 01:57 AM
    Posts
    1,682
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    Default Re: Interesting observation

    My husband and I have been married 45 years. He's been loving, protective and supportive all through my WLS experience. So grateful!


    "Lee, by "own it!" your daughter means that you should be proud of your accomplishment and understand that you deserve this. Not because you have to pay it forward or backward to justify your own benefits. She means that this is YOUR accomplishment, and accomplishing that for yourself is enough. You do not have to fix everybody. And you do not owe anyone for the benefits you have earned. They are YOURS!" Ann2

  19. #13
    Gastric Sleeve Member lvman's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Name
    Your Daddy
    Surgery date
    02/23/2015
    Surgeon
    Almanza
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Last Activity
    06-13-2019 05:13 PM
    Location
    Las Vegas
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    159
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    Default Re: Interesting observation

    I am guilty of this as well. Using food as the middleman my entire life



    [CENTER] Embrace your power of thought and manifest your dreams!!

  20. #14
    Gastric Sleeve Member mem222's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Surgery date
    12/22/2014
    Surgeon
    Dr. Duffy
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Location
    CT
    Posts
    1,076
    Said "Thanks" 2 Times
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    2

    Default Re: Interesting observation

    I'm not experiencing these changes. My husband has supported my crazy attempts at dieting over the 21 years we've been together. I didn't change either. We used to eat out a LOT - he is a chef and did not want to come home and cook ( I'm the world's worst cook). It was part of our lives and we didn't change it. I was the one who dieted and I wasn't going to force him to change. There were periods when he dieted and or exercised with me but I never forced the issue. We used to go out for drinks a LOT atnd when I stopped drinking I didn't ask him to stop, I continues to go out with him. after a while I cut back on going out for drinks and now I rarely go. He needs it for socialization. I am very shy and don't have the alcohol to lessen my nervousness. I have no problem with him going out alone. I have met the people he hangs out with (the bar has a "Cheers" atmosphere). They are very nice.
    To make an already long story short we support each other , cherish our time together and wouldn't have it anyway. We have our serious talks when we get up at 5:00 a.m. Before he gets ready (I go back to sleep after��)
    The best part is that now I get to support him when he is sleeved this summer! He made the decision alone and if our time together is going to change, I will be a decision we make together.



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  22. #15
    Gastric Sleeve Member plp55's Avatar
    I have had a gastric sleeve.
    Surgery date
    02/09/2015
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Last Activity
    03-18-2016 04:39 PM
    Posts
    119
    Said "Thanks" 1 Times
    Was Thanked 68 Times in 41 Posts
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    Default Re: Interesting observation

    So much of our lives revolve around food. You will be able to enjoy it, just a lot less. You can still go out for breakfast soon, just a couple eggs and coffee. Enjoy the journey , you two will be fine. And congratulations on your anniversary. My husband enjoys my new body, attitude, energy and smile! God bless you both!



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