I just found this forum, not sure why I never saw it, and I'm hoping to reach out to fellow sleevers who have a past (or present) struggle with an eating disorder.
I have a long way to go in my weight loss journey, but I'm almost reaching my 100lb weight loss mark. This week will mark the end of my 4 th month in this journey and up til now my mental and emotional ED thoughts have been in control. I addressed these issues prior to surgery knowing I needed a mental strength before surgery. But we all know the eating disorder brain may be out on the back burner, but it never leaves.
I had the thought today as I worked out hard at the gym surrounded by these thin athletic women "I could easily get away with starving myself." It actually shocked me that this thought crossed my mind. Why did I think this? Maybe because I had a low loss this week? Maybe hormones? Whatever the reason, I need to be accountable for that thought. I could easily starve myself. I'm home all day with my kids and not responsible to anyone food wise but myself. My husband wouldn't give it a second thought if I pushed my food around on the plate taking a nibble or two. That tends to happen anyways.
These thoughts will come and go throughout my weight loss journey, and for the rest of my life. It's up to me at how I react and what I do or don't do.
How do you handle these ED thoughts? How do you control the thoughts from becoming actions?
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