2 Years out, and not there yet...HELP

[incredibleshrnkngshirly]

Well folks, come July 13, 2013 I will be two years sleeved, and I'm not at goal. I'm not about to blame the sleeve. I know where my failure begins and ends...with me! I still suffer from an eating disorder. I can't say I crave anything, I just love to eat. I can't eat much but I'm certainly eating more than I used too. I've gained about eight to ten pounds...lost a few and my weight just hovers around the same place. I don't exercise, never have, have no desire to. I'm afraid that I have just given up altogether. I'm not even sure why I'm telling you all now. I guess I just needed to write it out, ask for your prayers and see what you all have to say. I should have made my goal last year sometime. I wear a size 16, I wanted to get down to a fourteen. It's like, I'm almost there and can't go anymore. I'm scared, I'm frustrated, and I'm mad at myself. I search the forum every day for motivation....I was so excited before, but that wore off...now I'm just depressed over the whole thing. I know I'm healthier and I'm glad for that. I'm praying for Gods help to be stronger around food. Any advice is appreciated.

[N2DVN]

Praying for you! I know how you feel. You are not alone. Have you tried the 5 day pouch test diet to help jump start your efforts? I need to do it myself. Best wishes!

[incredibleshrnkngshirly]

Praying for you! I know how you feel. You are not alone. Have you tried the 5 day pouch test diet to help jump start your efforts? I need to do it myself. Best wishes!

Thank you so much Val....I want to do the pouch test so badly but not real sure how to get started. Do I just drink all day long? Is it Protein drinks only? I need to do something and quick! I don't even want to go to the store because I'm afraid I would clean out the entire cookie aisle! What in the world is wrong with me? I came too far to lose this. Thank you so much for the prayers, I know they work!

[Kitreena]

If you dont mind my asking, why do you not want to exercise? My doctor told me it was key ingredient to success with this type of surgery for multiple reasons. And there are so many different ways to exercise! Possibly finding one you like and working out will help burn those extra calories! Best of luck to you!

[racrgirl39]

I am praying for you!! Have you tried speaking to your doctor or a psychologist? Also, don't forget you have done well. According to your ticker you have lost 80 pounds!! That is nothing to be upset about!! That is success! Have you searched online for the 5 day pouch test? I know there are several threads on this website about it. Also, again I would recommend speaking to your doctor or a psychologist too about the food demons. Our bodies may have been sleeved, but our minds weren't changed. I know I deal with the food demons everyday!!

[Truebody]

Your sleeve is working as best it can - it's your head that is letting you down.
Get yourself into a therapist whip specialises in food disorders because this is what you have.
The sleeve will not stop you filling up on rubbish foods....only your head will.
I think you we it to yourself to try something else - because the way you've been doing it is not working, and most importantly making you unhappy.
Exercise will also help. Releases endorphins that makes you feel good. Feeling good is not something that seems to have visited you lately.

[christine53]

The 5 day pouch test is also in book form. It really just talks about getting back to basics, protein and water. Why don't you just walk? I think for me was deciding IF I wanted to change. When I came to the choice, my health or my death. I choose health and life. God gives us strength within but if we don't want that strength, I guess it doesn't do us much good. I believe in taking that and using it for the good for me, but thats just me. Good Luck!

[nana banana]

The sleeve can only do so much. You need to do the rest. Are you bored, lonely, frustrated etc....? Instead of picking up food, go for a walk, go up & down a few flights of stairs, swim some laps. I hope you find the answers you need before the 10# become 20#.

[Lea]

Everyone has great advice. I would go back to basics and try a 10 minute walk. To start. Get through one day just with this. When u feel like eating fill a glass with water and sip on it or distract yourself. I still love food and want to eat but I will drink instead. You can do this. Get through one day. Once you get thru the first day you will feel better about yourself. One day at a time. Ps u have lost alot of weight! You are so close to your personal goal. Don't give up on yourself...

[Msvetrn]

Sounds like you wont let yourself get to a size 14. What are you scared of?

[Terrybellwith4kids]

For me the treadmill is my everything I hate excercise too but u don't have to be a marathon person you can go at your own pace start slow and work yourself up and you won't believe how it helps the mental health too and I promise you will feel so much better

[incredibleshrnkngshirly]

If you dont mind my asking, why do you not want to exercise? My doctor told me it was key ingredient to success with this type of surgery for multiple reasons. And there are so many different ways to exercise! Possibly finding one you like and working out will help burn those extra calories! Best of luck to you!

Thank you Lisa, I really don't know why I have always hated exersice but I have. I was a bean pole my whole life. One of those skinny kids who got made fun of because I was too thin. Mom said they had to make me eat meat. When I got married I weighed a whopping 125 pounds soaking wet. Wore a size nine dress. I used to walk everywhere I went, literally because I had no car until I got out of school. When I could drive places, I was so happy I gave up walking! When we got married we had no money so we just stayed home, didn't do anything or go anywhere. We both started to gain. I remember having to buy a size 11 pants. If I just would have known then what I know now! Not to eat the two huge burritos and refried beans from Taco Bell....( they were huge back then)...I ate large quantities of potato chips and dip....still no walking...nothing...I got bigger and bigger and bigger....I know what I need to do, I just can't seem to get off my butt and do it.....it's almost as if I'm setting myself up to fail, but why? I think I need therapy but our insurance went down the tubes last year! Thank you for the prayers, I need them now more than ever.

[incredibleshrnkngshirly]

I am praying for you!! Have you tried speaking to your doctor or a psychologist? Also, don't forget you have done well. According to your ticker you have lost 80 pounds!! That is nothing to be upset about!! That is success! Have you searched online for the 5 day pouch test? I know there are several threads on this website about it. Also, again I would recommend speaking to your doctor or a psychologist too about the food demons. Our bodies may have been sleeved, but our minds weren't changed. I know I deal with the food demons everyday!!

Thank you racrgirl39, I have my two year doc visit in August. I don't have a psych doc, or a nut. Our insurance won't pay for that anymore. I did do something for myself this morning though, I stayed away from the scale, sat outside with my coffee and had a good long talk with God. I thanked Him for all of you first, I had not read any of the messages or this thread yet...didn't matter what was said, just wanted to thank Him for those who cared enough to respond to me. I'm going to do a two week liquid diet in order to jump start myself again. I'm going to keep a log on here to hold myself accountable to all of you. Share my journey and hopefully help somebody else in the process. Thank you for you encouraging words, I need them and your prayers.

[incredibleshrnkngshirly]

Your sleeve is working as best it can - it's your head that is letting you down.
Get yourself into a therapist whip specialises in food disorders because this is what you have.
The sleeve will not stop you filling up on rubbish foods....only your head will.
I think you we it to yourself to try something else - because the way you've been doing it is not working, and most importantly making you unhappy.
Exercise will also help. Releases endorphins that makes you feel good. Feeling good is not something that seems to have visited you lately.

I think you are right Jen, I don't know where I lost sight, but I'm stumbling all over in the dark down here.
Thank you.....

[incredibleshrnkngshirly]

Sounds like you wont let yourself get to a size 14. What are you scared of?

I don't know, but I am scared of failing...