Recovery with Small children

**Cookie22** · 04-13-2013 12:32 PM

Hi Guys and Gals -

I have 2 small children ( 5 and 18 months) and i have a great support system ( hubby, mom / dad, and in laws), but my husband is a Old fashioned "machismo" man and i actually prefer to do all the work as far as cleaning cooking and tending to the kids.

For all you mothers (and fathers), Realistically, what are the limitations in lifting, carrying, bathing, bending over etc with your children. I'm not worried about the 5 YO, but the 18 month old is about 20 lbs and i think i may be overdoing it once i am post op. The dr only gives you the standard answers when i asked, so im ookign for some help from ppl that have been through it.

Thanks all!

**MomMaestra** · 04-13-2013 12:47 PM

you may want to wait until your baby is 2 or 2 1/2. I had to do that with a hernia surgery. You sure don't want to tear anything open. My daughter understood at 2 1/2 that mommy couldn't pick her up but I could sit down on the couch and she could climb in my lap. I'm sure with a laproscopic surgery yu "feel" like you can do more but a tear will start very small and gradually get bigger and bigger... not worth two surgeries in my book... IMHO

**Cookie22** · 04-13-2013 01:03 PM

Unfortunatly i cannot wait. I am paying OOP for Cobra Coverage as my previous employers ins covered this procedure at 100 % with 6 months nutrition as long as i meet the criteria ( BMI, 3 year dr notes etc). I resigned from the job when i was Halfway through so logically, paying OOP for 3-4 month of Cobra until after the procedure is better than payout OOP the entire amount. After the surgery i will also be eligible for my new companies ins (they DO NOT cover this procedure, but in case i need emergency IV or god forbid something happens, i will have some kind of ins.) The longer i wait the more i have to pay OOP, which i cant really afford.

I guess i will have to really TRY and take it slow and thanks for your reply

**Eileen123** · 04-13-2013 02:08 PM

You are just going to have to let everyone else take over for a while. Especially with the kids. After everything you are going to be going through, I wouldn't risk it. Good luck!

**Msvetrn** · 04-13-2013 02:37 PM

You seriously cannot give up a little bit of control for a few weeks?

**Cookie22** · 04-13-2013 02:43 PM

Ill try

but its hard. Especially not being able to hold my baby. It will def be harder on me than them.

**queen** · 04-13-2013 05:01 PM

I have 22 mos old twins and 19 wk old. the boys were 18 mos when I had my c sect. I was told I could sit and hold them in my lap, as tolerated. I was not to lift them or carry them while walking and not up stairs. I was not to lift them above cradle height (chest). My doctor told me the same instructions for this upcoming surgery. I shouldnt carry any of the kids around. I am allowed to lift the baby and move him if I need to, but not up/down stairs. (he is 13lbs) I can sit and hold any of the on my lap if I am comfortable, I doubt I will the first three days... anyhow, good luck and use your support.

**lidibear** · 04-13-2013 05:31 PM

My son was 14 months when I had surgery and my daughter 3. So here is the good and the bad. The 3 year old was a breeze. I showed her my ouch use ad she was great at being gentle with me. My little man is too small to know better. He was 26 lbs at the time the first week my husband stayed home and helped with the kids. I went back to cookin by say 3 and cleaning whatever didn't require me to bend. Week 2 my dad would pick me up every morning and drive me to their house so that they could help me with the kids. That being said, I still had to take my son out of his crib every morning and change te first diaper sometimes getting kicked. When I asked the surgeon about the he told me to only take him out of his crib and then straight to the ground. Slid him down my side to the ground so I did minimal lifting. Thank God he was an early walker. Back to the diaper changes, he did end up kicking 3 of my 5 incisions open w ought to bleed and they aren't the most beautiful incisions but hey, wasn't like I was expecting to look like a super model. Battle scars of a mommy fighting to be healthy for her kids. Week 3 I was home with the kids on my own while my husband worked. I prefer this. Like you I'm a little old fashioned and like to take care if things myself. I can say that getting back to my own routine so soon helped me not think about food all the time and I didn't struggle much w head hunger. If you have any questions feel free to msg me. Good luck!

**Cookie22** · 04-13-2013 05:44 PM

Thanks Queen - we are having surgery the same day

My 5 YO is fine not being held and my 18 month old actually prefers to run around ( he actually doesn't like to be held) but as far as getting him in the car set in his crib, i think i should be able to after a few days

**Cookie22** · 04-13-2013 05:48 PM

Thanks Lidia - that sliding him down rather then bending i will definitely remember. Its the little tricks like that i am looking for insight on. Thank god my little one walks already and he was never really a "coddler" he is very independent, BUT he is a fighter when it comes to diaper changes and clothes. I may need the hubs to help me in that area b/c knowing my son, he will kick all 5 incisions.