Feeling sorry for myself

[TracyEllen67]

Any body else start feeling depressed at this point?
I am not ready to go back to work, as I am so darn tired all the time. It is getting lonely at home.
I am starting to feel sorry for myself becauase I can't eat what I want and for what? I am not even losing weight like I hoped.
The "friends" who I thought would be there for me emotionally are not even around at all for me. Was our entire relationship built on food? On bingeing together? Ugh. I just feel really alone right now. My husband is trying to understand but he is not a food addict so he doesn't really get it.
I have to go food shopping and it is torture for me. Everything is calling my name! I guess I just need someone to understand how freaking hard this is.

[Bluegirlinredstate]

I'm sorry you are having these feelings. I actually went back to work day 6 post op which worked great for me. Keeps my mind busy and great support system at work.

[Msvetrn]

I'm sorry you are feeling so down and alone! It must be difficult. I have never once gotten depressed since my sleeve, but I have read on the forum plenty of times from others who have. Counseling is most likely what would help you now. You need to learn how not to depend emotionally on FOOD OR PEOPLE, how to stand on your own two feet and take care of yourself and, actually, not expect your husband to "get it". That is a big expectation and demand to put on him. I always tell people after this surgery...YOU had the surgery, YOU had the eating issues. Don't expect others to feel your pain, your hunger, your issues. Get out of the pity party and THANK GOD EVERYDAY for the opportunity to have this wonderful procedure done. Start TODAY - this minute - enjoying your life by everyday being amazed by how your body is changing, how your clothes are getting too big for you, how others are noticing the changes, how you are getting healthy. Even at 14 months out, everyday I am still in awe of the changes that have taken place since my surgery!
OK. I will shut up and get off my soap box now. Good luck to you. Please PM me in 6 months and let me know then how great you are feeling.

[marilynlw]

I understand all the emotions that you are going thru. I think once your are back at work and back to a more normal routine things will start to look up. If you can get out and get some exercise you will find that you will have more energy and the endorphins released during exercise will make you feel better and happier. Before going shopping write out a list of what you need and put that list in the order those items are found in the store. Make it a quick run through the store and get only what is on the list. Don't even go down the isles that don't have something you need to avoid the temptations. I hope this helps. Be patient with yourself because it is hard breaking up with food.

[aboutime4me]

You're not that far out from surgery so be gentle and kind to yourself. You've got alot to contend with combined with all the emotional triggers of Christmas and the holiday season. You will probably be tired for a little while longer. Make sure you're getting your protein and fluids each day. Take your vitamins and supplements. That's the first step. Also, being down or depressed is a side effect after surgery for many people. That's probably contributing to all this too.
Go hug your husband and thank him for being there for you, even though he can't really identify with everything you're going through. As for your friends, there are probably many reasons they are not there for you and having a difficult time with for themselves. Let them be and perhaps they will come around in their own time. We are here for you and you can lean on us right now.
Don't be frustrated and remember YOU are the important one right now and so is your mental health. One day at a time and your relationship with food will change, your body will change, the pounds will come off, sometimes slower than others...but one thing is for sure, this time next year 2013 you will be a whole different person...a person happy with herself, healthy and feeling terrific.

[Mbenson5]

Mary is so right! It just takes time to adjust to all of the changes in your life and with weight loss, your hormones can fluctuate and make you perceive things a little differently than you typically might. When I am feeling that way, I try to use my logical brain and look at the big picture. Sometimes (more often than not) I come on here and someone helps me see the big picture when it's just not clear. Hang in there my dear. It will get better and you will start feeling like your old self. Browsing in the grocery store is hard because you are conditioned to pick up the old reiables but again, the logical brain has to take over. That also gets better with time. Best wishes to you!

[wpage]

Please don't beat yourself up, you will feel better once you are back to work. Routines are so important when under going any kind of massive life change like this. I never thought I would miss work, but as it turns out I am not the sit at home and watch TV kind of girl. My surgery was on 11/19 and I have only lost 26 lbs so far...10 of it on the pre-op diet, so really only 16 since surgery, but you know what...that is 26 lbs that I would still be dragging around on my fat ass if not for my sleeve. I am okay with loosing it slowly, my body will do what it needs to, when it needs to. Trust me, we will lose weight, you cannot cut the amount of food you eat so drastically and NOT lose it eventually. Every body is different. Remember too that they only operated on our tummies, the brains are still very much intact and the head hunger will always be there...up to us to use our new tool to over come it. This surgery is a journey, not a cure. You are only 3 weeks out, give your body time to heal, take it slow. Your energy will come back little by little. I am still really tired by the end of the day, and I pretty much come home, fix dinner, do a little laundry and by 8 or 8:30 I am ready for bed (I get up at 5:00 am), but I am giving myself permission to do that until my energy is back up and you need to too.

[sandyfromoz]

Most everything has already been said. But I would love to send you a big Aussie HUG to you. Try to see the Sun through the clouds. I know it feels like the safety rail is missing sometimes when we face emotions that would normally send us to comforting food. It will take a while to learn how to comfort yourself other ways. I am still learning everyday. But PLEASE if you learn only one thing from above, just know WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU AND I FOR ONE ABSOLUTELY GET "IT".

[TracyEllen67]

Thank you all. I will get through this, I had a moment and am picking myself up today and moving forward. I do think going back to work is the best thing for me. I do need to get back into a routine. just waiting on the stupid paperwork from the docs to allow me to go back. I will call today about that. Thanks for understanding!

Tracy

[sandyfromoz]

That's great, just try to keep a little spark of excitement in there somewhere, even through the bad moments. It's all good and it IS happening for you. MERRY CHRISTMAS.

[Enfury8me]

Just remember girl, the weight didn't come on in 20 days and you aren't going to wake up tomorrow and wear a size 7. We all only wish that. Get back to work and busy yourself and you won't have time to be depressed. By the way it looks like you are doing great as far as weightloss!! Keep up the good work and move on down the road! We are all here for you girl!

[bergamini]

Sorry about how you are feeling. We had surgery the same day. I have a desk job, so I returned to work 4 days later. At times it has been challenging to focus but now that I'm in a routine, it's a good distraction for me and I find the energy because I like my paychecks. I would recommend going back to work and getting into your routines, that will help you feel better knowing that your life will go on. You will get through this and feel a lot better. Hang in there!

[gemini*eyes]

I cant relate.. I love it so far. I had my surgery three weeks before you. But i do think a few therapy sessions would help you. Dont bring down the hubby on your way down. Sulk then get over it. You will love the end result. you are less than a month out so what did you expect this soon? And maybe people dont want to be around someone who is depressed.. Sorry to say ... I sure wouldnt.. You will be able to eat things you want later down the road. Your trying to lose weight .. Arent you?

[liltoy27]

Oh my i can feel ur pain cause i don't deal with.ppl like that 2 say i have friends i will be getting sleeved Feb 2013 wish i luck i am a food addict 2 sometimes i feel like its worse than crack never done it but could imagine how i love food

[dachsie]

One of my " friends" decided she didn't want to be friends anymore. Said I wasn't fun to be around anymore. She accused me of things she does herself that I had just accepted as part of who she was. Well, frankly, I don't need anyone like that in my life so if she ever decided to "come back" I will flat out tell her that I accepted her for who she is and she couldn't do that for me and that I don't need that in my life. It hurt like hell, but I am a better person than I was treated as and you are too. You have taken control of your life. Be proud of yourself. If your friends can't accept that, then you will find new friends. Everyone is super busy for the holidays so maybe it's just a temporary thing. But you be proud of yourself. You can do this!