Big realizations

**angel face** · 03-25-2012 12:26 PM

I've been reading articles on why it is impossible to loss weight for the long term when one has been obese for a long time. My decision to have the surgery is a decision to loss weight for good -- or at least to give myself the chance to do so. The only other option is to lose and gain repeatedly (or just to stay fat) and continue to have the back pain, the hypertension, the sleep apena . . . Now if I can just get my husband and mom on board. It will be incredibly difficult to have surgery at the end of April if I have no support.from the 2 most important people in my life . . . and maybe no one to help me through recovery without making me feel like I've made the biggest mistake of my life. . . I know that they are just concerned about the dangers of surgery and that this is such a "drastic" approach. But, I don't think that I can do it without them.

**Maria1** · 03-25-2012 01:00 PM

I sat down with my family when I made the decision to have the sleeve. I explained to them that I needed to do this - I have tried and failed so many times and I can not go on like this. I told them that I know it is a drastic decision, I am not asking for anyone's approval or negative thoughts, I am taking full responsibilities for anything that comes from doing this, but I needed to do this for my quality of life. I asked that they will be there to help me from a medical surgery that I needed to have done, not a surgery to look better. I do not tell them when I have a fear or doubt about it because I do not want anyone when I have a weak moment to change my mind. I post on here and fellow sleevers help you through your thoughts. If I could of lost it and not gained more back after every attempt I would not be here. Good luck on your new life journey.

**purplelace70** · 03-25-2012 01:17 PM

I hear you about the yoyo, I have been at it for 50 years, up to 280 down to 170 and up again. Nothing seemed to stop the cycle. My wish for all of us is that with our determination we can do it and keep it off, so much better for your health. There are many people who judge and work against instead of supporting us. Some of them have their own negative reasons, even though they may not be aware. This is your job hon, and you hve to believe in you and use the support of this site. All the best and I support you 110%. Joanne

**supersmile37** · 03-25-2012 02:27 PM

I had a lot of reservations about telling family members. Thank God my hubby was very supportive. I did not want to tell other people because of the stigma of weight loss surgery is worse than the stigma of being fat.

What really made my mind up to start telling people is when the few people I told were supportive. One other thing is my overweight but not obeese friends are starting to loose weight just to make sure they stay smaller than me. I am like whatever it takes. It is nice to effect a postivie change.

**purplelace70** · 03-25-2012 03:17 PM

Way to go super smile 37. Be true to you always.

**BBARB** · 03-25-2012 03:22 PM

I hope they will see this surgery with your eyes. At the end The day the risk connected with the obesity can be many and quite serious life threathening as well.

**Sunflower** · 03-25-2012 03:28 PM

Perhaps you can gather some research that doesn't take a long time to read, with statistics, etc showing how safe WLS is now as compared to even ten years ago, and bring them around that way. I just don't think it's fair for someone to write off WLS if they haven't even researched it properly. Good luck.

**Maria1** · 03-25-2012 04:20 PM

People are afraid of SURGERY any kind of surgery. Don't get me wrong - I am right there. If someone says "I am having surgery on __________ fill in the blank" everybody is concerned no matter what kind of surgery it is and especially if it is in their family.

**Cait** · 03-25-2012 08:01 PM

I was going through this a few weeks ago. My entire family and all my friends were against the surgery. But you know what I started doing? I would email links of these conversations to my family so they could see, first hand, what people who've had this surgery are saying. I also sent them a lot of VSG success stories from YouTube. It educated them. My Dad, who was completely against it, is now fully supportive. My husband and Mom are scared, but are being supportive. My advice to you is to educate your loved ones. They will come around.

**4linton** · 03-26-2012 01:38 AM

Direct them to this site and let them read for themselves peoples successes that have had this done. If this won't do it as far as education on the subject, nothing else will!