I'm going to wake up right? I'm sitting here in this bed and I'm alone and freaking out a bit. My baby vomited in the car on the way here and it was so pitiful and that seriously can't be the last time I see her right?

I'm starting to panic now...becoming so real. November 28th is just 17 days away. I have this terrible fear that I'm going to die and leave my 10, 3, and 1 year old without a mother. I've been under general anesthesia twice before and all went well. My surgeon told me back in June that he has done over 800 sleeve surgeries and even elected to do an extra year in school specifically for this surgery. No one has ever died and he's had 2 leaks happen and he was able to repair them. Little voice in

Read More

I had a lot of anxiety surrounding this appointment today but it was for nothing. She was so kind and she understood so much about me in less than two hours. I have had a lot of trauma in my life and I've worked on it a lot but the one area that I struggle with is food. It's not sweets and binge eating...but eating too much at mealtime just in case I don't get to eat again. I knew I was doing this but I didn't dwell on it as much. I was angry at myself but the fear of being hungry is real. I have

Read More