i am sipping a chocolate protein shake made w/ 10gprotein skim milk as we speak. see i told you i dont always eat crap lol! i have a "good" job with good benefits and nice pay; so god knows i dont want to jinx myself in this crap economy by complaining but i swear to god my cube is stealing my soul. i def have associated work boredom/frustration with grazing all day. plus we get free food catered in and brought in all the freaking time. grrr. i get full for about 45 min -an hour depending on what i eat. so there's an hour of satisfcaction; plus i am working so that takes up some brain time.it's really the last hour until my next feeding" that i have to use good mental discipline to not snack. : ) anyway, 202!!!! girl, i wish. so jealous. in a good way! any chance you're sabotaging yourself ?like does that freak you out to get to the ones? i was wondering that about myself lately bc i got all excited about getting close to wonderland @ 235 (a girl can dream) and then all the sudden caught myself really struggling with grazing/snacking or whatever cute word i want to give to overeating. continued next box

continued.....Outcome of this is that damn scale hasn't moved in a month and 1/2 and I cant get below the 202 pound mark to save my life. got down to 101.1 and then right back up the next day...it's so frustrating!!!

You crack me up and thanks for your honesty. Some days it seems like I eat a ton of food too and I am amazed. Yesterday for lunch I had a 1 inch thick slice of spinach artichoke, parmesan stuffed chicken breast and then I had about 1/2 cup of left over tater tot casserole, I was so full and it seemed like I was eating a crap load, but then when compared to what I used to eat, that whole 2 cup container would have been full of casserole and I would have eaten the whole thing and probably a bunch of chips or crackers with it....So overall not so bad. I need to try your every three hour thing, and see if it works. I usually eat breakfast at work around 800 ish and that consists of 1/2 cup 2% cottage cheese and a container of diced peaches or 2 to 3 oz. of Turkey summer sausage. I will try to get a protein shake in after this is possible as I am losing so damn much hair it is scary!! If I have a snack it's around 10 and I have 2 dill pickels or sunflower seeds. Then lunch which is usually dinner leftovers or something from the noodle place next door, thai ckn salad, or noodle or rice bowl, all kids size. Then afternoon snack of popcorn or turkey sausage or few chips and salsa, I just eat all the damn time while sitting at my desk because I get so stinkin bored and I hate it but I will fall asleep if not putting something in my mouth.

Hi Gordita, I hope this msg reaches you well... let me start by saying I love your posts and they make me feel confident and sure... My name is Lisa and I live all the way in Sunny Qatar, next to Dubai and I am 32 yrs old and weigh 257 Pounds, I have always been chubby since i went thru puberty and I really have always been overweight... anyway, I am considering the Gastric Sleeve but, in all honesty have heard more negative than positive on the effects of the surgery, plus, I don't have children and would like to so, I am afraid this could effect the pregnancy process.. so, could you plz tell me a bit about your story both pre and post surgery and let me understand better the whole world of Gastric Sleeve Surgery? You seem like a wonderful person to give true, honest advise

I have always admired people who can write. They say that we all have a book in us.. But I don't think I would get past a first chapter and be stuck for words. One of my old boyfriends writes his own books.. I felt very honored to be mentioned in the forward. But I also realise he must scrutinize everyone's relationships and lives and I am sure some of his stories are based on past and present friendships so you wonder if any of the characters are based on people he knows.. Hahah. I wish you all the best with your writing i am sure you will do great if you are determined. I need to get into my art have slacked off since before Christmas and I need to get back on it.
As for those people who ask me how I lost the weight depending on how well I know them if I tell them. I prefer to be honest but I will wait and see what happens will let you know how it goes. Basically I have been a fat lump for about 14 years so it's going to be a surprise for some people.
Talking of which I better get off my ass and do something as I have been at my computer too much lately. We have been stuck in the snow up here and haven't ventured out at all. Always a worry whether we will get back up our mountain driveway!
Take care and wire who you can I always enjoy hearing from you
Love Hev (Heather)

Hey girl you made me laugh... I wish you were down the road... I could do with a good friend up here.. They are few and far between. Your comment about smacking someone just made me smile. A friend I have known since I was 11 a lonnnng time ....is someone who feels she has to tell everyone what she feels about everything and when I got a message on FB from her telling me having this operation was not the way to do it.. It made me mad because i had already done it and what was her aim for me? Because she certainly didn't have my best interests at heart... That being said I am excited to see how much of my not so fat ass will fit in that plane seat on Friday!
I hope all is good with you? What have you been up to?
All the best
Hev

that is an olllld atkins classic! i eat potatoes still on sleeve but it's such an easy/good tasting substitution that i don't mind it. we use frozen cauliflower , boil, drain. salt pepper and butter (the real stuff) and my husband adds cheese (cream cheese if we have it; i skip that for calories if im the one cooking but i dont sweat it if he is since im only eating a couple tablespoons total); anyway-i put it through the food processor bc teh texture ends up perfect. my husband, who hates cleaning the FP uses an immersion blender to puree it. whoever cook trumps in our house as you can tell : ) good luck!

Brilliant idea replacing potato with cauliflower... i am going to try it tomorrow.. thanks Gordita you are a gem!
love Heather

How are you doing girl ? Hope you had a good Christmas love Heth x

I hope the hair loss soon subsides mine is thin anyways but I have 4 wigs to choose from and I would wear them if I had too... I have done all the Christmas shopping I intend too...and tree went up yesterday just now need to get a few food items but not that interested in too much food. Are you taking Biotin for your hair... I take 3 times a day.... Still thin and falling out... But hopefully it will be ok
Getting excited about going home... Can't wait ... Take care speak soon Love Heather x

How are you doing? I hope this week is going better?
One more week and it will be Christmas and it will all be done with!

I wish you had told me where you lived before I was in Florida in September .. Ah well my step daughter lives in the keys and we go down to the keys every now and again. So maybe some time in the future we can have that tea/coffee :-))
I know exactly what you mean by it bit fitting you in February. I am staying at 169 I need to either eat more and exercise.. Yesterday I was like I was wired right till 2 in the morning and today I am pays for it.. Am so tired! Well I must get off to sleep take care and keep in touch love Heather :-))

Thanks Gordita for you lovely message good to hear from you! I am excited that for once in my life I won't be the fat one at my daughters wedding :-)))
I was really depressed when I was fat and no self confidence .. I am feeling just right now not over confident but comfortable in my skin which is a lovely to feel.
Hope all is good with you?
Love Heather (Hev)

i told you in another comment you may also not have seen that you are one of the handful of people (including ooeebaby and a couple others) who i watch for on this site. i like your attitude and insight. plus im jealous you live on a mountain and are an artist : )

lol. one of my blogs (called fat people pictures or something close to that) has several pix (albeit chosen for being flattering ) of my full face. thanks for teeth compliment. i think that photo exists bc i sent a post dentist pix to my sibs in a silly mood one day. : ) -gordita (hali pronounced hay-lee)