Things mentally have been hard lately. Between the Easter candy and McDonalds Shamrock shake I want to shoot myself in the head! Yesterday I ate out for the first time. I ordered a turkey burger (no bun) no salad, no fries. It was good but I obsessed about all the food I couldn't eat. Is it ever going to get easier?

Today is day 4 post op. I must have been in some type of fantasy land because I had no idea I would have this much of a difficult time! I knew there would be incision pain but didn't know it would be so hard to get anything down! It hurts to drink anything. The more I try to get fluids down the more my tiny stomach hates it. The surgeon's office has told me if I can't get even minimum down they are going to admit me again. I really hope it gets better.

I am less then 48 hours from my sleeve surgery and I have mixed emotions. The liquid was SO HARD! I wanted to give up twice. I have only lost 14 lbs and I don't understand why. I worry alot as the surgery gets closer if I wont be sucessful. I worry that I wont lose enough or if I do I wont be able to keep the weight off.