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Negative opinions

  1. bev
    bev
    Can someone please tell me why most people, especially the ones we are close to are not more supportive about having gbs. I am so very grateful for groups such as this one. Our support of one another is soooooo important will help us to live longer (god willing) and be healthier. I will have an endoscopy 11/30, this is part of the pre op eval. I wonder does everyone have this. Also 12/01, i will attend my first support group, the psychiatrist said meeting makers make it. At first i thought, " i don't want to meet anybody, it sounds dumb going to a support group". However, about 3 weeks ago, i started reading posts on gastric sleeve and now i am always posting and i really feel good.
    Until next time
  2. uniqdrgnfly
    Hi bev, I understand how you feel. Even though I don't have much of a family outside of my husband, kids, grandkids, and a couple of really good friends I have had for years who has stood by me nonjudgmentally through everything, it can hurt.

    But you know, I look at it like this: It is my body and my life. If a VGS will made me healthy again and allow me to be able to do more than I can right now, that is my choice....and I must live with it. My mother was what I call a "conditional lover"...if you agreed with her or did everything her way, things were very good. I know she loved me in her own way and I hold no grudges, I just have made sure that I am not that way with my kids...lol.

    I think that sometimes others are literally jealous of our courage that we show when we make major decisions such as this type of surgery.

    You hang in there cause their eyes will more than likely pop out when they see the "new you"!!!!!!!!!!!! Good Luck!!!!!!!!!!
  3. TucsonAmy
    TucsonAmy
    Part of the reason i didn't tell anyone but my closest friends before the surgery was that i didn't want to hear any negativity. I announced it about 10 days after and i have received nothing but positive responses from all my friends and co-workers. I don't know if it would have been the same pre-op, but I'm glad i did it this way. I can't address your other question because i had my sleeve done in Mexico, so the process was much differnt..and in my opinion much better. Hang in there. All will be good after it's done!
  4. jerzeygirl
    jerzeygirl
    I told/tell anyone who might be around. I'm so proud of what I've done and continue to do that I want to shout it from the rooftops. The primary said she thinks much of my success and hopefully, continued success, is due to the fact that I'm social and that it helps the success rate. I try not to listen to people's comments and just contiunue on this journey. I think I actually was boring people at work when I first came back because it's all I wanted to talk about! Since moving on w/life, I can now talk about different things..lol...
  5. Kim MzLady Williamson
    Kim MzLady Williamson
    I have had some negative but mostly positive support for the negative one I tell'em talk to the hand!! Don't hate because I plan to look great!! as well as healthier than I have ever been that why I love this site it's informative positive and full of positive energy!! Keep moving forward head held HIGH stay in prayer!!
  6. Mick
    Mick
    I am sooo tired of looking the way i do and see how people treat me because of my weight. I really do not care what they will say about my surgery.

    I have spoken with several folks in the past few years that had wls. They all have told me that their friends and family treat them better, much better, than when they were so large.

    Lord willing, I am going to have the surgery for me and my family!
  7. jerzeygirl
    jerzeygirl
    I had an endoscopy because my gastro. dr. advised it would be a good idea for general anesthesia. It was easy and thankfully, it worked out that everything was good.
  8. TucsonAmy
    TucsonAmy
    One more hurdle you have overcome. Wishing you smooth sailing for the rest. You will be so glad you did this!
  9. sheddybeme
    sheddybeme
    I told very few people about my surgery because I didn't want anyone to try to talk me out of it. I said try because they could not do it, but I didn't want to be the least bit stressed about anything. Most that knew after my surgery have been supportive and a few that said, "why did you need to do anything that drastic?" I have a quick wit and can be a lil sarcastic, and would usually reply, "I didn't feel like being in "fair" health anymore, didn't want to take my diabetes meds anymore, and was sick of high blood pressure, and was tired of yo-yoing with my weight. Why do YOU feel the need to ask me such a silly question?" I also explained that the sleeve isn't really all that drastic, and I'm so happy I did it. I will never regret it. I tell them now I can "eat like a skinny girl", you know, take out a small amount of food on your plate and be full before it's licked clean.
  10. RosieSweetie
    RosieSweetie
    I only told my husband & my daughter. A co-worker got WLS & told everyone; a lot of snarky comments were made behind his back. My Dr (NOT my ins)required me to get endoscopy, EKG, psych eval,nutritionist, support group, on-line seminar and a other things, incl. a pre-op diet. First I was annoyed- those copays add up quick, not to mention the running around, but now that I have had WLS, I think it was good. It made me keep evaluating- do I really want to do this? And I felt safer getting the surgery. Also, it made those closest to me realize this is going to be a huge change and I needed them on board to support me. Some ins co won't pay unless their pre-op requirements are met. As for the ignorant people- ignore them and focus on your health. This is a big journey so try to surround yourself with positive people. Good Luck!
  11. magimae
    magimae
    I told my husband, daughter, 3 sons & daughter in laws, siblings, parents, and few close friends during the 6 months pre-op phase. My last day at work before surgery I told most people at work. The only negative remarks I heard were from my 23 year old daughter. She does not have a weight problem, and doesn't remember me thin. She has always strongly encouraged my husband & I to go on diets, exercise and get healthier. She doesn't understand why I can't just stick to a diet and lose the weight. She is mad at me for not sticking to my diets. She has basically ignored me after surgery, it hurts me by her lack of support. But I told her. I did this for me...no one else, and that I need the help and support of this surgery to lose. I know she is worried for me but it is so tough not to have her support.
    On the positive side my husband of 34 years has been my anchor, helping me at every step!
  12. Msvetrn
    Magimae-all I can say is, "Kids!" She'll get over it.
  13. dreamydeb
    dreamydeb
    what happened to all us over 50? im 51 and really need the support of others. i went to back dr today and guess what? im at 199!thats 15 lbs lost since jan 10.im pre surgery and finding it really alot easier to follow dieticians suggestions than i thought.yay im in onederland before my surgery!good luck to u all,and please post more!
  14. Msvetrn
    Wow! Congratulations, Deb!
  15. LindaJ
    LindaJ
    When I decided I was going to have the surgery, I discussed it with my children. They took it all in and eventually started making comments like, "are you sure you want to do this" "you know it will be a big change" etc etc. I knew most of their comments were out of concern, so I sat them down and discussed all the options, including sitting on the couch until I am too obese to move, and die in a few years. I then told them what surgery I was opting for and the reasons why. I told them what changes would have to take place in my life and how I expected to make those changes. Once I did this, they finally realized that I had really done my homework and was making a very informed decision. Since then they have been very supportive and send me articles and stuff they find out on the surgery. So their comments were made out of concern and now tell me how proud they are of me. :-)
  16. Michelle58
    Michelle58
    HI All. Michelle here from Massachusetts. I'm 54, 211lbs and 5'3" Getting a plication because I have parkinson's and the neuro Dr say that the Hunger hormone they cut out with the sleeve (MAY) help PD. Who knows all I know is I'm taking control of my life. Only my husband knows. I'm making him pay for it. My MOM found out by accident. I'm not saying anything. Everyone says I look find. Then they call me a build-a-bear. (You can laugh I did) : ) June 24 2012 will be the beginning of a new day for me. Michelle
  17. pstebbins1108
    pstebbins1108
    I must admit I'm not getting as much support from my family and friends that I'd like but you know what, this is my body, my health, and my decision. Except for high blood pressure, achy joints, etc., I'm in pretty good shape to handle the surgery. I didn't like the idea of all the fills with lap band and the rerouting of intestines with the gastric bypass surgery, so it seems the sleeve is a good fit for me. I'm at the point now where I don't care what anybody else thinks. I want to be healthy and if this gives me that, no one should have a problem with it. These people are also the same who have seen me try every diet out there with little or no success, so go figure. LOL Right now I'm looking forward to no blood pressure meds, no Cymbalta and the ability to exercise without feeling like I'm 90. Oh, btw Medicare is no covering the sleeve surgery as of June 27, 2012. Yay
  18. pstebbins1108
    pstebbins1108
    Sorry spelled that wrong: Medicare is "now" covering the sleeve.
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