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Keeping Gastric Sleeve a secret! WORTH THE READ!

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My surgery was September 4th 2018.
I'm 23
My wife and I live/take care of a couple family members.
In a full-time housekeeper at a hospital.
My wife and my bestfriend know about my surgery, that's pretty much it.

Now I know what your all thinking. Keeping the miracle of Bariactric surgery a secret! Why? How?...

Well the answer to why, is the fact that I have so many people around me that have some many opinions. With so many STRONG personalities! Most of those people have high degrees in the medical field..... So why wouldn't I want their advice? I do. BUT at the same time I don't because, people will find out, and flood my ears with stories. "Oh my uncle Joe had serious complications from bariatric" " Everyone I know who's had it has ended on with a pacemaker." So that's why I'm keeping it to myself! To protect myself from hundreds of negative comments that would only make my journey harder!

Now the lengths I've gone to keep this a secret from my co-workers, I executed almost perfectly. I spoke nothing of my numerous pre-op meeting. I went to a hospital hours away even though I work at a great hospital that has several specialties, including a certification in Bariatric. So how did I make sure my coworkers didn't realize I was gone? Just before surgery I had applied for my same position but on a different shift, knowing I would be floating all over the hospital working in a different unit every day! I worked on the new shift in all different areas for 2 weeks. Went to my old unit on my breaks occasionally only to say how busy I was and probably couldn't come visit very often. Therefore they are not expecting to see me for quite sometime!

Guess what? I also told nobody in my family! Not my mom. Not my dad. None of my grandparents. None of my inlaws. And not one of the handful of siblings I have. So yea it's been tricky. I dieted hard pre-op letting people know I was on a diet and a very strict one at that! Hoping they would see the dedication I have for this attempt at a better life . I'm sure alot of you reading this know the struggles of being MOBIDLY OBESE! Unable to walk up 4 step without being completely out of breath. The hundreds of pants I went through because my thighs rubbed giant holes straight through them. I couldn't even tie my shoes, I had to take them off tie the just right so when I leaned up against something I could wedge them on, ending up sweating profusely and out of breath. Being told to get of a ride at an amusement park because "sorry its simple, you just cant fit." Everywhere I went.... "sorry weight limit". Hell even my car has a weight limit that only 150lbs more then I weighed!

But you know what? I'm done. That WAS my life, but it will NO LONGER be my life!

So hear I sit in my basement on my couch with my mini fridge full of protein packed 2oz jello cups, and protein water galore. With my protein jello shot in hand, cheers to you all, I wish you the best of luck and goodnight!

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  1. KiwiGal's Avatar
    Well done you. You are on the way to a healthier (and probably happier) life.
    It is no one's business except yours. I too didn't tell many people and a year out they still don't know. I am half the size I was and I explained it by saying I was eating less and exercising more - both true. Some people have been concerned as they thought that perhaps I was ill. I have thanked them for their concern and have said that my weight loss was planned. No one really takes any notice now :-)
    Sending you all good wishes for your recovery and new life.
  2. DutchSleeve's Avatar
    Good for you!
    Your life, your body, your health, your decision, nobodies business.
    Exiting, isn't i?
    Good luck to you!
  3. Sh5's Avatar
    Boy, you sure know how to keep a secret!
    I told only three people and five years later, I think, only three people know how I was able to lose 63 lbs.
    Congrats to you!
  4. donna1743's Avatar
    I told a few family and friends but now 4 yrs, 8mos. out when people ask I tell them I have 85% of my stomach remove they alway say, sorry I tell them I’m not. It the best decision I ever made.
  5. MikeMo's Avatar
    I think this works either way, but having had strong willed family members totally understand why you would want to keep this a secret.

    I have some very curious coworkers, and my wife encouraged me to tell them what I was doing. Surgery went good and I've had several people come to me privately asking about the procedure and how it has worked for me, as they consider if this something they'd like to consider. But I also had a couple of family members who really questioned my decision. However, they lived several hours away, so it was manageable.
  6. sraebaer's Avatar
    My bariatric center posts everything on Facebook. We also have a private group, but they never use it. Seriously, do I want my hundreds of Facebook friends, mostly acquaintances, to know I had weight loss surgery? - no way! I am careful never to comment. I know they just want the advertising for their center, but they are not going to get it from me.

    Here's the response I got when I asked why they don't use the private group:

    Of course we respect everyone’s right to privacy, but we encourage our patients to take pride and joy in their success and to overcome the shame so many have carried with them for so long. And yes, we do want to spread the word about our services so that we can help more people achieve that same success.

    The purpose of our public page is to increase awareness of bariatric surgery to the community and all or clinic has to offer. The public page is open for those who would like to share their experience/story to do so.
  7. MsLisa71's Avatar
    I also hid my surgery, well best I could. I shared only with my immediate family and a few close, lifelong friends.

    Work was another story; I chose to have my surgery at the OR where I work. Finally around 4-months postop I "outed myself" on FB because people were noticing the difference in the few photos I had posted. Some private messaged me afraid I was ill

    When I did let folks know on FB, I was blessed with all kinds of support; 83 people liked my post and 66 people commented - not one negative response or story about weight gain or lack of success. I got a little tired of "hiding" my success - I feel so good and my health is greatly improved - I want to shout it out from the mountain tops!!

    The folks at my work from the OR staff & surgeons, to EVS workers, to Dietary staff who have seem my transformation before their eyes have been incredibly encouraging and supportive.

    I totally get why people keep this personal, but I have also been pleasantly surprised by the support and not negativity that I have received.

    All the best to you on your journey. It's important to handle it the way that is best for you.