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The Weight of the World

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I feel as though the weight of the world has been lifted from my shoulders.

I am once again back on the losing track and my head is in the weight loss game - something that, let's be honest, I had my doubts would ever happen again. I say this not with haste, rather because I know there were several doubts swirling around in my head in recent months as to whether or not I would be able to successfully rebound from the varying degrees of chaotic irresponsibility that had formed once the dust had settled here in the South Dakota.

But all excuses aside, that is really what it came down to: me versus the big move.

Looking back, I can accept every ounce of responsibility regarding the problems that stemmed as a direct result of the move, but the reality of the situation was such that I had to face and subsequently own up to my wrong doing - a feat that was much harder to do than one would realize.

Many problems arose from the ensuing weight loss issues that have been covered within the blog pages of this community. But what hadn't been covered was how it was affecting me socially, physically, and more so, the full scope of the emotional toll that had taken place. It wasn't that I was hiding information. I was very forthright in my blog posts. What it came down to was the realization that my life had in fact been turned upside down. I just didn't realize it until it was too late.

I already had one failed weight loss surgery. Finding fault in the matter doesn't seem to matter when it comes down to the fact that I was not successful despite my best efforts. You can imagine my horror when it appeared that I was facing yet another failed weight loss endeavor - this time, without a doubt, by my own hands. I was mortified, terrified, and horrified. I did not, would not, and could not allow this to happen to me again.

Thankfully, through the art of words and with the help of a collective group of understanding and extremely kind individuals found here, I was able to once again find my way, right the wrongs, and move forward on the path of success.

To date, I have lost approximately 10 pounds. That would be the amount of weight that was gained over the course of the past five months (since January 2018) which means I am on course again and, God willing, I will continue to lose until I reach my goal of 185 pounds. I am currently more than half way there, but I know this is where it starts to become real, where it becomes that much more difficult to lose the excess weight, and where the utilization of my tool matters the most. I am taking each step in 10 pound increments. I am 5 pounds from my next small goal, and a mere 15 from the one beyond that. If I can reach those two milestones, I will have considered this effort to be a HUGE success.

I will, of course, keep you all posted.

Have a great weekend!

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  1. Stacey03's Avatar
    I'm so happy for you Shannon, you have really grabbed the bull by the horns, made a plan, stuck to it and are seeing the success you deserve. It must have been very anxiety producing because of your history with wls. You ARE a success anyway and now you will get to where you want to go and only we can decide where that is. Many congrats on your progress :-)
  2. Christie13's Avatar
    Self reflection and realization can be a very powerful thing. It is amazing what we can accomplish when we sit down and get real with ourselves. You can do this. Just keep the focus. Sometimes on this journey it is all about tweaking and listening to our bodies.
  3. Shannon'sVSG's Avatar
    Hey Edie!

    Thank you so much for the kind words and inspiration.

    While some days are more difficult than others, it is all about getting through it and getting on with it. Having said that, I would be lying if I didn't admit that my WLS history plays a major role in how I do things now. The most difficult of all is erasing EVERYTHING I was originally taught with the RnY. Having a VSG is far removed from the RnY, and given the fact that my previous WLS wasn't performed correctly...that adds a certain level of difficulty I hadn't previously anticipated. But I am trying to move past all of that and realize that I have been a second chance = something I recognize some people aren't able to get.

    Have a great weekend!
  4. Shannon'sVSG's Avatar
    Hey there Christie13!

    Getting real with myself seems to be something I have been doing a great deal of lately. it is my opinion that in doing so, I will be able to overcome the mental obstacles that often present themselves as a result of my previous WLS.

    I know I can do this, and I believe I am focused. I have no doubt. I guess I didn't take into account how difficult it would actually be (having to erase and re-learn everything about WLS.)

    Have a great weekend!
  5. Christie13's Avatar
    Definitely a lot of relearning and retraining our minds throughout this process. I can totally relate to that.
  6. KiwiGal's Avatar
    I'm only just catching up on all the news as I have been away for a few days with no computer access - it was great! ;-)

    So glad to read that you are feeling in control again.

    Small goals are the way to go in my opinion. An ex boss of mine always said that we should tackle a huge job like eating an elephant - one bite at a time. Ironic seeing that this is a WLS forum, but maybe still relevant!

    Keep at it and please keep posting on here. Your thoughts are always interesting and inspiring to read.
  7. Shannon'sVSG's Avatar
    Hi Lisa!

    I couldn't agree more. Small goals are indeed the better option when trying to obtain an outcome such as weight loss. In the past I attempted to reach milestones only to have them fall flat. Never again. Currently, I am taking my weight loss journey one day at a time, because I know that in doing so, if there are minor setbacks, I will not feel disappointed in my accomplishments.

    Thank you for the inspiring words regarding my posts. Your timing is impeccable. I was actually beginning to think I was droning on and that the community was growing tired of hearing me speak.

    Have a great week!