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Martini

Im so scared of failing!!!!

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i have my date already. but the problem for me is knowing when to start doing a low calorie diet. i was only told to do a liquid diet for 5 days before my procedure. they never said anything about doing a low calorie diet or anything else for prior to surgery.


Also my next issue is that my family at home is not very supportive of anything. I have already been mentioning the fact that im not supposed to be eating any beef or pork. but the more that i express any of this to them the more that all that they want to eat. i just really feel like im already fighting a battle that is half way doomed. especially when im the one that has to cook for these ppl in my home. and if i dont make what they want its a big fight/arguement.

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  1. DesertGal's Avatar
    Just remember you are doing this for YOU. It's a difficult decision to make, having the surgery, and a personal choice to do it. A support system is something you really need, because this is hard to do.

    I HAD to go on a weight management diet for 3 months before surgery, per my insurance, to see how I would do, showing them I was committed. Plus, my liver needed to shrink per the surgeon. It was HARD because I love food, and my family still had to eat (i am their cook). But I did it. I drank a protein shake at breakfast, ate 2 oz of tuna or chicken at lunch in a salad and 2 oz of lean meat (chicken) with steamed veggies at dinner and lost 42#. Since surgery in March, I've now lost 49 MORE pounds, so im down 91 pounds since December.

    You have to stay focused and not give up. You can do this! Good luck!
  2. Linda51's Avatar
    Do you have to cook for them? Are they small children or invalids? If not, I say let them grow up and take care of themselves while you concentrate on getting yourself healthy. I guess I'm just really lucky to have a husband who can take care of himself.
  3. Martini's Avatar
    thank yall so much for the encouragement. is there a site or something that i can look up to see different recipes to get started on and to keep me going once i have my surgery?
  4. Ann2's Avatar
    Martini, welcome to the phase where you tell THEM what YOU are going to do. You are not their servant or their employee or their waitress or their short-order cook. You are someone who is doing something pretty effing significant to get healthy so you do not die prematurely. And if they can't handle that and support your efforts to regain your health, then you've got some new information to process and some additional decisions to make.
  5. Christie13's Avatar
    If you were only told to do a 5 day liquid diet before surgery then that is all you need to do. Every surgeon prescribes whatever pre op diet they want and that is what yours wants so do not stress about that. Some people have absolutely no pre op diet.
    As for the unsupportive people....you may have to go it alone and find support elsewhere. It is time to put YOU first. You can do this and you will not fail. I was afraid of failing too. I just had a feeling that I would be one of the people that this would not work for. I also felt like I was losing weight slower than others. So I worried. A lot. But I began to relax and just trust the sleeve and follow my program. And I saw that I was successful. Here I am under goal and loving life. You will not fail because you have all of us to help you on your journey. YOU GOT THIS!!!!!
  6. kloe818's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Martini
    thank yall so much for the encouragement. is there a site or something that i can look up to see different recipes to get started on and to keep me going once i have my surgery?

    I went to www.bariatriccookery.com and pinterest for recipes. Just search for 'pureed bariatric recipes' online for that phase, or even in pinterest if you have that. Pureed chicken with a little bit of ricotta was my go-to for that phase.
  7. GigiUSA's Avatar
    Martini everyone is right, you are doing this for you. You can't be afraid and you can't let others dictate your life. I had a struggle on my hands before I got started too. Mine was a litte different but you know what.... I did what I had to do and when it was all said and done, they took care of themselves just like I knew they could. Let your family get take out, cook simple meals or whatever they need to do. Unless they are little babies that can't help themselves... believe me.... they figure it out. Stay strong xoxoxoxo
  8. DesertGal's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Martini
    thank yall so much for the encouragement. is there a site or something that i can look up to see different recipes to get started on and to keep me going once i have my surgery?
    I found SO MANY great recipes on pinterest. I typed in gastric sleeve recipes, and Ba-Boom... tons of things.
  9. Suzjsan's Avatar
    In all fairness, our families are going through huge changes too. And they did not choose the change. And they may not be as ready as we are for the change. I sat my family down (a few times) and had conversations about my health and why I am doing this and that we all need to make changes in order to be healthy and happy. I apologized for teaching them bad habits and reminded them I am not punishing them by changing our foods. In fact, I was punishing them letting them eat crap. I do all of the cooking and shopping too and I realized I need to be in charge again. Because I do all of the cooking and shopping I had to own that I DID THIS TO ALL OF US!!! I started asking "what do our/their bodies need" instead of "what do their mouths/taste buds want for a meal". I said it is no longer about what we think we want to eat. We need nutrition to stay alive. If we all ate what we wanted all the time we would all have health issues and that is not fair- especially my young kids who can't cook for themselves. I had to reclaim my title as the one in charge... our taste buds are not in charge anymore! It is hard to give up the foods that are fast or easy and full of sugar and salt, etc. It is a survival instinct to want sugar and salt. The preservatives and chemicals in prepared and packaged "foods" are neurotoxins that hijack our brains and make us crave more crap. But we are not in a famine. We have to break habits. But I also realized I had to allow them to complain and argue a little without taking it personally since they are being forced to change along with me. No one likes to be forced. And the brain hates the changes. Our bodies crave the crap if we have had it in our system. ALL humans all go through withdrawals when the sugar and salt and chemicals are removed. It's just physiological. And withdrawals make us crabby and whiney and headachey and complainy. They have to withdrawal because I allowed them to have foods I shouldn't have. I DID THAT! They are paying for me taking the easy way out when I was tired or shutting them up or avoiding arguments by giving them what their taste buds and cravings or habits or friends wanted. So my new rule is whoever complains about dinner doesn't have to eat it, but they don't get a different choice and no snacks after dinner. No one ever died from missing 1 meal. (And so far no one has skipped an entire meal.. they pick a little at least.) I have to stay firm for them out of love so they can get through withdrawals and crave good healthy food again. And my husband is the worst! But he is an adult and has an ATM card and if he doesn't like dinner he can make something else himself or go buy something OUTSIDE of the house. I won't have it in my house anymore. I cleaned out the pantry and fridge and won't buy poison foods. My husband is an adult and has the right to ruin his own body however he sees fit. But the kids... they are my responsibility and I have not been consistent on having them eat healthy foods and part of the price I am paying for that is that they hem and haw when they don't get what they want. I did that to them. So I suck it up and know that once we have all been back on track for a while we will all crave healthier foods once again and it will get easier. And I know it will be worth it. Having surgery on a major organ is no joke. We have to make lifestyle changes or it won't work. We all see the sites about regain. But maybe we can do it with love and patience. Making changes is not easy. They won't have the "gift" of a smaller appetite or reduced grehlin or even the urge to vomit if we eat too much. My family and I have been having conversations about being a team and that in order for me to "win" that they need to be on my team and we all need to win if we are going to be happy and healthy. We started talking about the things we can do together if we eat healthier and stopped making food and treats the only thing to bond over. We have watched a lot of documentaries on food and what the government allows to be added to our foods that cause disease and weight gain to make a profit. We quote the phrase "sugar makes you sick" and "chemicals make you sick". I am not sure if any of this helps you and I am not sure how your family responds to force.... but if this even helps you one minute it was worth sharing. I have been waiting 9 months for this surgery since my first appointment so I have had lots of time trying to tough love them to change with me and it didn't work. I don't usually write much on any type of posts but this is one area I know I was struggling with and it was HORRIBLE. I felt so alone. Recruit your team. Ask for their help. My kids are now combing through healthy recipes with me and sometimes keeping me be honest and stay on track! Good luck!
  10. sraebaer's Avatar
    I had a five day liquid diet before surgery too. That was it. I basically lived on protein shakes, and was told there was no limit if I was hungry. I even froze the chocolate ones to pretend they were a Wendy's frosty.

    I am blessed my hubby is the most supportive person on the planet, and it has helped so much. He cooks a protein and veggie most every night. He is not into junk food, so we have no crap in the house. (Kids are grown and gone!)

    But if your family is not supportive, you're going to have to get tough and think about yourself. Cook what you want, and hopefully they will come around. I still eat beef and pork, but not as much as I eat fish and chicken. My nutritionist said the less legs the better! Just got back from a Wisconsin fishing trip, so we will be eating no legs for a while. YUM.
  11. Ann2's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by sraebaer
    I still eat beef and pork, but not as much as I eat fish and chicken. My nutritionist said the less legs the better!
    I love that!
  12. Christie13's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by sraebaer
    I had a five day liquid diet before surgery too. That was it. I basically lived on protein shakes, and was told there was no limit if I was hungry. I even froze the chocolate ones to pretend they were a Wendy's frosty.

    I am blessed my hubby is the most supportive person on the planet, and it has helped so much. He cooks a protein and veggie most every night. He is not into junk food, so we have no crap in the house. (Kids are grown and gone!)

    But if your family is not supportive, you're going to have to get tough and think about yourself. Cook what you want, and hopefully they will come around. I still eat beef and pork, but not as much as I eat fish and chicken. My nutritionist said the less legs the better! Just got back from a Wisconsin fishing trip, so we will be eating no legs for a while. YUM.
    Great advice. Never thought to freeze a chocolate protein shake.