3 years, 1 month starting over.....again
by
, 06-18-2017 at 01:04 PM (1815 Views)
Pretty embarrassing to be writing this honestly. I feel like I've failed myself. I've gained back almost 20 lbs and never reached my goal. I am in a reset mode (again). Unfortunately the stress, travel, and family losses have taken its toll on me emotionally and physically, but I am done with putting myself last. I have started to journal again, doing a cleanse, and reintroduced my shakes. I have made it clear to my family and work associates that I need help and NO! is going to be a big word for me. I never felt the big restriction and feel none now.
I hate exercise, but I have been super active the last 2 days. My buns of not steel are killing me, but I feel so much better. I am also scheduled to meet with 2 surgeons regarding my pouch. My doctors have told me now for many years that will never go away due to previous surgeries. I'm hopeful one of them will have a low risk, not going to put me debt, solution.
Ok, I guess that's all I have to put down today. It's been difficult. I've ignored my tool and allowed my grief and emotions to control my diet. All I can do is move forward.