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seecshrink2017

God's country...

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Tomorrow I will begin my journey toward preparing my mind and spirit for the up coming surgery... here are a few of my thoughts.

I am flying out to Phx, Arizona in the morning and then traveling to Young Arizona for a preparation retreat. The actual retreat will be May of 2017.
The purpose of the retreat is to bring healing and ministry to recovering addicts. This first gathering is to pull the team together and outline what we will be doing in May. This location in Young, that I will be visiting is a remote homestead with the presence of God all around. I will be there for 5 days. This couldn't have come at a better time. I am feeling like I need to step away from regular life and reset my foundation. I am excited about this venture and I am so hopeful that God will bless our efforts in how and what we will doing at the actual retreat.

On the VGS home front, I have completed my final appointment necessary to be able to submit for insurance authorization. Yay! Now it is just a waiting game to see if the insc will auth! I am hoping while I am away doing my thing... I will come back to a surgery date. Right now they are looking at as soon as 12.5 or 12.12 or 12.19. I am actually hoping for 12.19. We have family coming in town over the holidays. Having the surgery so close to the holidays I will more then likely be able to take off FMLA for the whole time everyone is here! So that would be good. However I am holding this very loosely at his time. I will be ready when ever they decide. ...

"I will be ready when ever they decide"

interesting statement....

I am ready right?
I am doing the right thing... right?
I feel a since of peace when I think about it.
Even the "food" parts... actually it seems like it will be simpler (which is probably not true) then what I have been doing for the past several years now.

Being gluten free is definitely a life style. I am already used to restricting foods. .... I am really less worried or concerned about that part. But surgery!? Someone cutting me open. ... now that seems scary. I am trying not to let the fear get the best of me. ... pretty much just breathing through it when it seems to creep up on me.

I am projecting into the future and the potential of having a normal life... well, for what ever normal is. I feel like I am supposed to do this. It seems like a natural fit for where my life has led me to up to this point.

I honestly can't imagine what it would be like to be a "normal" size. I have been over weight for 40 years. Since I was 9! Every year, ever summer, every winter, every holiday, every birthday, every single day of my life for 40 years! I know the layering that is covering my body now must have served a purpose for many reasons... and I am wondering how I am going to emotionally be as the weight comes off? I have prepared those closest to me with as much information and warning as I can.

My doctor says I don't have to do a pre-op diet, just continue to do what I am currently doing. I think I am still going to do at least a one day clear liquids fast prior to surgery... and maybe a protein drink day two and three prior to my surgery.

Most all of the research I have done it seems most people feel pretty decent 3-4 days post op. Hoping that will ring true for me as well. I am looking forward to having more energy and feeling lighter. I am tired to very often and I have things I want to do!

As I stated in the beginning this planning retreat has come at a perfect time. I am hopeful I will have any questions and concerned answered and calmed while I am communing with this amazing team. I will be seeking the Lords guidance for many things, and He is so very faithful I have no doubt this all has been orchestrated in just the very way He wanted it to be.

That is it for now.
Many prayers to those who are reading and need it right now. I also ask for your prayers in return.

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  1. Christie13's Avatar
    Hope your retreat was great. Did you have surgery yet or are you still waiting for a date. I felt better within a few days but was tired. I went back to work a week after surgery. You still have to work and make good choices but not feeling hungry does make it easier. I'm 4.5 weeks out and can still only eat a few bites. Definitely takes some getting used to. Especially making sure every bite counts. Definitely make sure you have a good vitamin regime set up to ensure you're getting everything you need. And make sure you have a good support network. Reach out whenever you need to. Good luck!
  2. seecshrink2017's Avatar
    Hi Christie13!!

    Yes the retreat was wonderful. So filled with God's spirit it is unbelievable and so comforting at the same time. We assembled most of our team for the upcoming recovery retreat this summer. I feel so blessed to be a part of this venture.

    My surgery is on the 19th. Thank you for offering insight and kindness. I am excited and nervous. I keep thinking everything is going to be so different? Am I ready. I think so.