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Katrina

Huge vent

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I have to get this out somewhere so you guys are the lucky ones that get to read my dirty laundry if you so choose.

I wish my mother would fall down a flight of stairs and break every evil bone in her body. I am so over her. Yesterday was the final straw, but we'll start with earlier last week.

Sometime early last week I made mention that I had received a couple of steroid shots for my shoulder/back and had subsequently gained about 4 pounds. She says to me that I need to get my butt outside and work those pounds off. I should not accept them and that I'm letting my weight get out of control. You guys, I weighed 113 when my mother was saying this to me.

Friday she came over to my daughter's apartment. This is where I live during the week to take care of my daughter since her brain injuries. We are standing in the kitchen. I'm about to heat up a bowl of lasagna for myself and she says "You're really going to eat all of that?" She says this literally as she is finishing off a piece of pizza and dipping out her own bowl of lasagna. As I point this out to her she says "I just want a taste of it. I'm not going to eat all of mine." She ate all of it. She's also had this surgery. She tells me every time she talks to me that I'm going to gain back all the weight I lost but she's not going to gain hers back. She eats even worse than I do. Delusional bitch!

And here's the kicker, not weight related at all. My grandson, Maddox, died last year at 4 weeks old. He was born at 22 weeks, so it was a miracle he made it those 4 weeks. He was so damn precious! After he died his mother, my Brookie, fell apart. We lost her Christmas night. Until she died she carried two of Maddox's baby blankets with her everywhere. My mother had those blankets. Yesterday my niece had a baby shower. She opens her gift from my mother. Inside were two knitted blankets. She asks my mother aww, did you knit these yourself? My mother quickly waved her off and told her a friend knitted them. OMFG, it took everything in the world for me not to jump up and kill her on the spot. Those were Maddox's blankets!! He died wrapped up in one of those blankets! This bitch just wrapped those blankets and presented them as a homemade gift to my niece for her expected baby boy. Unfuckingbelievable!! But see, Alex, my niece, is no fool. She was just as much in love with Maddox and I. She knew exactly where those blankets came from. She will take wonderful care of the blankets.

What kind of sick, twisted person raised me? I am the daughter of the fucking devil.

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  1. poodlecamper's Avatar
    Katrina,
    Is your mother on psyche meds? Because she needs to be. You have suffered enough, you need to distance yourself from her if possible. I had an evil mother inlaw like that, always the insults.
    And a mother who has always valued physical beauty and thinness (which I never had) over scholastic achievement (thank God I had that going for me).
    Sounds like she is in a competition with you, instead of seeing you as a daughter who needs support. I feel some of your pain, my Mom's favorite has always been the beauty contestant,4x married selfish bitch who is my sister. The 8x10 of her in a bathing suit graced our living room all my growing up years.
    Your Mom is a terrible hurtful person, and I guarantee you not a happy one.
    Peace to you and take care of yourself. Carol
  2. Sandra3's Avatar
    Hey Katrina, I'm sorry you had to suffer so much during those past months. So much trauma...
    Here is how I see things:
    We don't chose our family. I found that my best way to cope with an abusive mother was to keep my distance. Easy for me to say because I lived overseas for more than a decade now. But it's never far enough...I could write a novel the size of a phone book about all the mean things she did to me and others.
    But I chose to keep my distance, not chew on the past and live it behind me... because I don't want to keep thinking about bad things. It's bad for my health and my "soul".
    At least the blankets are safe now.
    Be strong! Don't pay attention to her! I'm sending you my best wishes! Take care!
  3. Ann2's Avatar
    I"m with you.

    She needs to DIAF.

    Seriously.
  4. Yellow Rose's Avatar
    I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with her AFTER everything else you've been through. We certainly don't choose our parents, do we?

    Like Sandra said, be strong. Take the high road - don't stoop to her level. She's striking out at you - for whatever reason. Draw strength from your daughter's and grand baby's memory!
  5. sraebaer's Avatar
    I'm so sorry for everything you've had to deal with, but wow, that woman sounds crazy. Re-gifting blankets from a baby who passed away?!? Vent away, we're all here to listen.
  6. barbaradear1's Avatar
    Katrina,
    I was reading some of your posts the other day and my heart sincerely goes out to you. I can't imagine all of that pain in such a short amount of time. Everyone has that one person that just drives them crazy and sadly it is usually someone we want to love us (that is why their actions tend to bother us so very much). I do try to look on some bright side of things...At least the blankets are now with someone who knows their value and will respect them. It is always comforting to know that something that holds so much sentimental value is being treasured.

    As for your weight...I see your pics and I personally don't think 4 pounds is snowballing into gaining back your weight. I know we all look at 4 pounds and freak out, but you look and sound like you have done amazing with everything you went through after your surgery.

    I hope you find comfort in knowing that your stories really inspire me, as last week I was in a serious depression over my own children. You see, that person that drives me crazy lately is my oldest daughter and mostly because she took my grandchildren and won't tell me where they are and I miss them dearly.

    Good luck with everything and try to stay strong.
  7. KariVSG's Avatar
    Im so sorry your going thru this
  8. Katrina's Avatar
    Thank you so much for all of the support. It really means a lot. Toxic relationships suck, especially ones from which you can't extricate yourself.