Hello, onederland! And struggles galore.
by
, 08-19-2014 at 08:29 PM (1533 Views)
So today was the big day. I hit onederland and have officially lost 100 pounds. I never thought this day would come for me. I always thought I would fail.
I'm 6.5 months post op (I think). I did my first huge NSV goal about two weeks ago.. I went to a water park for the very first time with my nephews. I rode all the rides and the kids weren't embarrassed to be seen with me. It was fantastic.
I've struggled a lot with poor choices. I've eaten loads of Taco Bell, ice cream, and drank a lot of soda. I'm also officially an alcoholic, though I'm working on that daily. I have fallen off the wagon, and gotten back on. I've been frustrated, I've stress eaten. I've tried to binge. I've purged a lot. I've really come to realize my poor choices cost me valuable time and health wise! When I eat right, I lose well. When I eat crap, I get stuck and feel icky. I guess the point is we will all have these rough patches. We just need to push through them and improve ourselves. We can't beat ourselves up over the choices we make. Just make your next meal a better choice. Exercise today. Don't get caught in the "I'll do better tomorrow" or "well I've already blown today, so I'll go ahead and have....." Those are traps!!! You can do better NOW!
I've put in a lot of work and sacrifice to destroy these 100 pounds. I've fought a lot of personal battles.
Who has info about the marriage statistics? I thought my marriage would make it, but in this journey I came to realize I didn't want it to make it. I was so miserable. I thought the first guy that came along and loved me would be the one because he accepted me for being fat. Unfortunately, he isn't the nicest or most caring guy in the world, and leaves a lot to be desired. I've never been happy with him. I just thought that was how it works. In leaving him, I have met a truly amazing person and I hope things work out. If not, I'll survive. I just want to give myself a fair shot at being happy. I've struggled with my husband for years... Counseling, empty promises, everything. It's a lost cause for now. I hate that, and it hurts, but I don't think we were ever a good fit. I think it's better for both of us. He deserves someone that will be crazy in love with him. I feel like a super bad person for this.
Anywho, that's my life story. Enjoy!