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Totally Lost it!

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I totally lost it today and cancelled my sleeve. Dr came in and told me about the possibility of my lungs collapsing and all i thought of was dying. I thought of my wife and seven kids being left behind and I freaked out and told them to cancel everything.have to call tomorrow and see what the dr office says. Might not get to have it at all.bad bad bad day. Praying didnt help. Look if anyone has any ideas on what to do and get this done please let me know. I need all the support I can get. Please yall


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  1. abcd1234's Avatar
    I met with PCP this afternoon for my final appointment before surgery (which is Monday) and she was so encouraging and excited for me! She made me feel great about my decision. We talked about that i'll soon be off of my blood pressure and cholesterol meds and won't have to worry about diabetes or sleep apnea which i've managed to luck out and not have. Don't get me wrong, i'm nervous but I think this may just be what I need in my life to make the changes I need. The pre-op alone has gotten me to lose 10 pounds. It's not much, but it's a start! Not sure i've said anything to help, but know you're not alone. Good luck to you and well wishes!
  2. kaygee's Avatar
    Maybe making a pro and con list about the surgery will help you weigh whether you should go through with it? Will the long-term benefits outweigh the short-term risks? All surgery has risks. You just need to decide if you want to take that risk. Good luck! !
  3. Lea's Avatar
    I am sorry you received this warning from your doctor. What are the chances? I understand this is a scary surgery and the anticipation of it sometimes is worse than the actual process..I know it was for me. I hope you get some answers and food the courage to go through with it. We're they just letting you know all possibilities??? Or do you have an unusually high risk of this happening? Hoping everything turns out ok for you
  4. Lea's Avatar
    Food- find
    Darn swype
  5. Bilby's Avatar
    Think of spending many healthy years with those seven children.
    My consent had 5 pages of complications .... To me it was worth the risk
    I have no regrets .... Good luck with your decisions
  6. danrhowell's Avatar
    Dr. told me that it is something that happens regularly with this surgery but few know about it. Whats worse is they left me in the prep room by myself and when i asked for my wife they told me ok and just kept going. The longer I sat there the worst i got.
  7. speedracer's Avatar
    I had a dream about this happening. Read my older posts. If you cant do it, you cant do it! But dont let this stop you from eatting healthy, working out, and staying alive for those 7 babies and your spouse!

    You dont have to have the sleeve, diet and exercise can work for you!

    I know its a tough call-
  8. sandiinmo's Avatar
    You will have to weigh all the pros and cons for yourself and make the decision that is best for you and your family. I had fear as well, but focused on the positive future ahead. Yes, there are surgery risks but think about the life path you are on now. I have a family history of high blood pressure, stroke, high cholesterol, and heart disease. Ive worked with adults who have toes and legs amputated from diabetes. I was starting to have health problems and I had a clear picture of what was ahead if I didn't lose weight and focus on my health. Fear can be a good thing, makes you do your homework and research. But don't let fear be the reason you remain stagnant, letting life pass you by, letting your own body prevet you from being a healthy father for your children. Wishing you the best.
  9. RST84's Avatar
    I am so sorry you are feeling this way. Only you can decide what will work for your family but I am sure you will be successful whatever choice you make because you sound ready for change. Lots of luck
  10. MaryEllen's Avatar
    sandiinmo said it all. I too felt fear, having to basically sign your life away with all of those releases. Being 59 and having asthma and high blood pressure I was scared I would not wake up but I knew that I did not want to spend the rest of my life feeling the way I did about myself. My surgery last Wednesday, 5/22 went off without a hitch, you have to do what is right for you. Maybe your not ready now but keep up the pre-op food plan and the surgery may be some you will consider down the line. God bless you and your wife and those wonderful 7 little one.
  11. Anklo9678's Avatar
    The hospital HAS to warn you about anything and everything that could possibly happen during surgery just in case anything does go wrong. Anytime you go under general anesthesia you have a risk of dying. That is the worst case scenario. There are always risks with any type of surgery. You just have to decide of the benefits of the outcome of the surgery are worth taking the risk. I wish you the best of luck with your choice.
  12. proud_mommyof2's Avatar
    When I walked in to my pre-op appt I was excited. When I walked ou I was nearly having an anxiety attack. I knew there were risks as woh any surgery but when you have to sign the consents that you understand, whew totally freaked me out. All I could think about was leavin my 2 and 4 year old, my husband and my dad behind. Somehow when the dr said he had not had any patients have major complications and not had any deaths, it really find make me feel any better. When I left there I was a little uncertain as to what I had gotten myself into. That night my husband and I discusse it and I realized that although the risks may be severe, the likelihood of them happening was pretty minimal. After really thinking about it and praying on it I put my faith in my surgeon and had the surgery. I am 3 weeks out and 25 pounds down. Only you can make this decision. If you aren't sure, give your self time, Don't rush it. This is a big decision that only you can make. Good luck!
  13. Shelly84NZ's Avatar
    I have read about people having collapsed lungs during the surgery ... but the surgeons are prepared for the possibility and know what to do to get you through it. While obviously not a walk in the park, I don't think it means you would be leaving your family - SEVEN kids? You stud!

    If it is a huge sticking point with you, I believe you can reduce the risk by stopping smoking (if you do!) and working with a physiotherapist doing chest exercises and using a tricky sounding gizmo called a 'incentive spirometry' - basically it has you breathe deeply and hold the breath for a while to measure the strength of your lungs.

    Make sure surgery is something you really want. Weigh up the pros and cons. Good luck!
  14. danrhowell's Avatar
    Thanks everyone. My mind is still on edge but I know I have to have the surgery. I have to get over this or I am not gonna be able to do wht I have to do for my family
  15. MomMaestra's Avatar
    I guess it is only natural to realize your mortality in face of any surgery. I have had several and each time that is my unspoken over-riding fear. But fear can keep you locked up in your house. If you need the surgery do it. Know that it is not a walk in the park, it takes dedication and deliberation. There are ways for doctors to talk to patients and I would say your doc has never been a surgical patient or he wouldn't have been so arrogant and crass. I pray for peach after you make your decision.
  16. MomMaestra's Avatar
    or peace
  17. Ducky's Avatar
    As a previous poster stated, they are legally obligated to tell you ALL of the potential complications/risks. A lot of people don't think about them until they're confronted with the consent forms, and it can be pretty jarring. I have a blood clotting disorder, which makes elective surgery kind of a 'no-no', but I talked to my surgeon and went ahead with it (on blood thinners) because I NEEDED it. It wasn't cosmetic or elective. I'm 13 days out and 20 pounds down (no pre-op). Statistically speaking, I think there's something like a 1% chance of death, which is about as low as is can get (literally). I'm guessing that most of the potential dangers of this surgery are related to the typical patient's size/weight more than the surgery itself, as obesity complicates pretty much everything on the medical side of things. I'm not trying to convince you one way or another, but I did want to note that the risks/complications are detailed for legality's sake, not because the doctor necessarily feels you will have them. That said... maybe you should talk to another doctor? I'm really sorry that they didn't pause so your wife could join you. Very insensitive. Thoughts are with you.
  18. queen's Avatar
    Mmmm peaches..... oh wait, yes mortality! I am terrified of dying right now. I never gave it much thought before, but now w three babies and the three older men in my life...well, i am terrified! And now i have to go through the feelings again having just had lapband removed. I know that when i think about not having surgery, i think of how bad my feet hurt, how i cant get up from or down to the floor when playing w my kids, my lack of energy, not fitting into seats properly(on rides at park, on plane) how i cant stand being outside when its warm because i instantly get Flushed.....i am not being The mom/wife that they deserve! The harder you work preop, the better your chances of a easier recovery. Good luck my friend, u will make The Right decision for you and your family!
  19. christine53's Avatar
    your dieing now with all that weight
  20. Lea's Avatar
    We all had/have to sign off on order to have surgery.....realize this is something we all have to do. There is risk with all surgeries. I hope you go through with it. I know you will be just fine
  21. lil_lisa's Avatar
    I signed up as a friend, if you want to talk we can, we all get really nervous looking into this, I keep reading and hope I am strong when it comes the time.