Good Lord, I know I've gained some pounds, but really? Those pants were so far from closing you'd think I'd gained back ALL the pounds. I weigh 115.4, but trying on my formerly fitting pants made me feel right back to my old over 200 pound self. It hurt.

And what gives... They're size 25. My Joe's jeans are size 25 and fit well. Which ones are lying to me? I thought they're supposed to be more accurate when they are sized that way?? ...

This right here is one of the reasons why gaining any weight is painful for me. I post a fun picture of me with my granddaughter, and suddenly I'm "showing off my girls" just because I've gained a few pounds and they're out of control again. Why is it that anyone with breasts is considered showing off their tits when they put on a bathing suit, but anyone else is just wearing a bathing suit? God, it annoys ...

I've been tracking my calories and nutrition again, and eff this! It recommends that I get 1,200 calories per day. I went over by 87 calories. Gained 1.4 pounds! WTF?! I felt like I barely ate anything that day. That was a really light day for me. I usually snack so much more.

I didn't track yesterday because we had all homemade stuff and I had no idea how to track it. I made mozzarella stuffed meatloaf, mashed potatoes, sautéed squash and onions, rutabagas, fresh green beans, pierogies, ...

I feel like all I ever do is complain, and I feel that way because it's true. There's always one crisis after another hitting my family, and I always feel like I'm at my breaking point. How I'm still here I'll never know.

I still have ongoing major pain with my left shoulder and neck. I've gone to all the appointments, done everything exactly as I've been instructed, nothing has helped. Doctor at last appointment noticed I have obvious weakening on my left side (my dominant side) ...

I stepped on the scale this morning, it read 101.0. What?! Why you lying to me, scale. I'm on a steroid pack right now. I know I've been to the bathroom more times than I can count, but no way that I lost that many pounds. I stepped on it about 10 more times, and finally got it to say 109.4 three times consistently. That sounds much more accurate. My scale is just as nuts as I am 😂