I started my life as the chubby child, awkward. I had strawberry blonde hair my mom had permed, brown eyes and a few freckles scattered all over. I was the oldest of two girls. My sister, she was an adorable kid. She had long, light brown hair, big, brown eyes, that were in all reality the same color, shape and size as mine, but I always liked hers better. As we got older, my mom put us in dance lessons and I naturally thinned out. My sister however didn't. She was never phased by being a "bigger girl." I envied my younger sister for her confidence.

Fast forward 15 years and we both have had children and steadily gained weight. Our mother had undergone RNY bypass surgery with great results, although she had had some complications in the beginning. I now found the three of us in a hospital room together as my mother was undergoing once again life threatening complications. This time it was Stage 4 Inflammatory Breast Cancer. My heart was crushed with fear. She was only 48, far too young to die Lord. We needed her still. So many of us know someone who fight against cancer, so I'm sure you know of my mother fighting to her very last breath. How her only concern was ever that of her daughter's.

My mother passed four years ago today. It was in true Shelley fashion. She didn't pass when her older brother, who is an oncology, nurse sat near her and said she was "close." No, Mom waited until her beloved Michigan State Spartans made it into the final four during the NCAA basketball tournament. She was an early riser, who didn't want her loved ones to worry about her. The hospice room my mother was staying in was small, so after the game my sister and I slept in the family room, my uncle in a patio area and my grandpa with my mom. Grandpa sat there listening to her breath. He remembers looking at the clock before he drifts off. Within a half hour a nurse comes to wake us all up. Mom was peacefully leaving us with those who love her most surrounding her.

The following days were a blur, but I had made a promise to my mom that I intended to keep. I was going to get healthy again. I had not lived my life overweight. I had seen what it did to my mother growing up, and when she made a lifestyle change, dealing with her weight issues, it soon became too late. It scared me. So I went on diet after diet. I gained some more.

It may have taken me four years, but Momma I'm really doing it this time! I'm nine days away, and I'll wear something pink for you.
Xx Jacqui