It Isn't Overnight People

[sraebaer]

Please, please, no more posts about how "I ONLY lost XXX pounds in XXX time." ONLY doesn't go in a sentence about losing weight. Shout it from the rooftops, "I lost XXX weight in XXX time!!"

If you are doing what you should, you will lose weight, I promise. (On the other hand, if you are eating a gallon of ice cream every day, you may not lose weight.) If you can't mentally handle slight weight fluctuations which are a part of life, get rid of your scale. You won't lose weight overnight, but it will happen fast. Faster than any time you tried to "diet." Enjoy the ride, and quit stressing about every pound.

AHHHH!!!! Rant over.

[Ann2]

I endorse this message. ^^^^^

[Ima Fox]

I think people should be able to come here & vent their frustrations however they want. I think they should be able to say whatever they want the way they want to say it. People have different conditions, circumstances, etc. If you don't feel like reading what they write, please don't. If you are able to offer encouragement or a different perspective in a gentle, supportive way, please do. I doubt that the majority are losing slowly because they are eating a gallon of ice cream "everyday" (what a condescending, fat shaming thing to say, btw). If they can't vent here, where can they vent? Sometimes good suggestions come out of it that help others. Just saying.

[Mich-D]

Each of us come at this from our own personal experiences and expectations.

That said, I wish this is something more surgeons, medical information sessions, and psych consults cover in greater detail. Although, I am on pace to lose XXX lbs in XX months, your results WILL vary. This is just like the guy or gal each of us know that seem like they can eat anything and not gain weight. Several people here have seen my posts and want to know my secret so they can have the same results. Neither I or your surgeon can guarantee optimal weight loss. Just like I will not expect my plastic surgeon to make me look like a young Matt Damon.

Put the scales away like I have done. I honestly do not know my current weight. I do know it is time for me to get a smaller belt and retire the size 46 dress pants as I am wearing a looser size 42 and size XXL shirts. Try not to be fixated how quickly or slowly you lose the weight. Instead, take solace in the fact you ARE losing weight!




All my best,

Dwayne

[CharlieFarley]

I think people should be able to come here & vent their frustrations however they want. I think they should be able to say whatever they want the way they want to say it. People have different conditions, circumstances, etc. If you don't feel like reading what they write, please don't. If you are able to offer encouragement or a different perspective in a gentle, supportive way, please do. I doubt that the majority are losing slowly because they are eating a gallon of ice cream "everyday" (what a condescending, fat shaming thing to say, btw). If they can't vent here, where can they vent? Sometimes good suggestions come out of it that help others. Just saying.

That's fair enough. But sraebaer's point is also valid; there can be an amount of melodrama associated with those "only" statements.

There's no doubt that the surgery will work (to a greater or lesser extent, as Dwayne says) over a period of months. With just a small amount of common sense, it cannot fail. A bit of patience over a couple of weeks is all that many people would need to reduce anxiety levels.

My own progress chart suggests to me that (in the first few months) even if a weekly weigh-in shows a slow-down, it catches up with itself a week or two later.

(I know Ann2 likes my graphs! )

[DebDeb]

I think you're ALL right! I'm no expert (I was sleeved on 17th July) but I do remember in those first few weeks how fixated I was on the scales and the numbers - I think it's a throw-back to pre-sleeve dieting days when what the scales said was all-important. Also, when you're first sleeved, if you're anything like I was, you are still scared that you may be the one person that it doesn't work for! Until you experience the delight (and I mean DELIGHT!) of realising that the scale isn't going up and the worst that can happen is that you stay the same weight for a while until your body catches up with itself, you're going to be stressing about the scales. I'm sure that all of the posts that I made in the early days had all been posted a hundred times before but I was really very grateful for the opportunity to get things off my chest in such a supportive environment. These days, I often read posts from people asking the same questions that I (and the hundred other people) asked a few weeks ago. When I feel up to it, I reply as honestly as I can. When I don't, I know that lots of others will do it for me I agree with sraebaer that getting too hung up on what the scale says is a mug's game but I also agree with Ima Fox when she says that people should be able to ask whatever they want (as long as they do it nicely ) I guess that puts me sitting firmly 'on the fence'

[Ima Fox]

People have a surgical procedure & it's a Big Hairy Deal. They are anxious to see if it's working and how well, hence the weighing. I remember Ann writing in the past that she chose not to go 100% public with her surgery because she didn't want to be known for her failure if it didn't work for her. I'm paraphrasing, but what she said resonated with me from then until now. What if it doesn't really work for me? Personally, after 59 days post-op, I am not foot loose & fancy free. I am struggling daily to consume enough calories & water. I have not consumed 1000 calories yet. I get enough protein due to the shakes & the bars. I do not love the shakes or the bars, but make myself eat them. After I eat a few bites of something, I'm done. Eating is not a very pleasant experience for me. I wonder if I'm doing the right thing by consuming all these chemically laden high protein & diet foods (sugar-free sweet things) or if my body would be better served by eating clean? Clean eating would mean even fewer calories. My Fitness Pal keeps telling me I'm going to damage my body by eating so few calories. I have classes back to back & no time to leave the room to get something out of the fridge. I'm doing the best I can under the circumstances. I keep looking for solutions. What I eat in class are packaged items like jello cups, apple sauce pouches, seaweed snacks, protein bars, etc, with the kids constantly pointing out that I don't let them eat.

I'm happy to lose any weight at all, but its very slow going for me. Not a single person in my life has noticed that I've lost weight. If, as Drs. say, one loses that majority of their weight in the 1st 6 months, this is very bad for me. Because of this, I have empathy for those who are struggling. This is where I want to come to talk about it and get it off my chest. I think I should be able to speak freely about my personal situation even if it doesn't sound like I'm throwing glitter in the air. I'm not going to assume the burden of not posting whatever I want because I'm afraid of getting on the nerves of whomever.

[char602]

I think people should be able to come here & vent their frustrations however they want. I think they should be able to say whatever they want the way they want to say it. People have different conditions, circumstances, etc. If you don't feel like reading what they write, please don't. If you are able to offer encouragement or a different perspective in a gentle, supportive way, please do. I doubt that the majority are losing slowly because they are eating a gallon of ice cream "everyday" (what a condescending, fat shaming thing to say, btw). If they can't vent here, where can they vent? Sometimes good suggestions come out of it that help others. Just saying.

This works both ways. I too find it commical to read 'What's wrong, I've only lost 18 pounds in 4 weeks'. I too yell at my tablet 'When was the last time you lost 18lbs in a month!?!' Alas, they have just as much right to post as anyone else and the people who really dislike it are able to post their disapproval of these sort of threads. This is a community of people who share a similar problem. Our thoughts, processes, journeys and experiences are not always going to be the same. What we have to do is learn how to read and/or comment on the stuff that we identify with & ignore the stuff that we find of no value. The only posts I can't tolerate are the personal attacks, and even those, though in poor taste, people have a right to post.

[DebDeb]

I'm so sorry you're finding things tough going Ima Fox I remember when I first went onto puréed food, feeling as you do now - that eating wasn't a pleasurable experience any more - and worrying that it would be like that forever! (I shed a few tears over it too!) Now, eating is better than it was but not as 'good' as it used to feel pre sleeve (for which I'm actually very grateful!) Food isn't a 'quick fix' for me any more, nor is it a 'treat' but it doesn't have the control over me that it used to, which feels great!)

As far as shakes and protein bars go, here in the UK the advice seems to be a little different to in the US (my surgeon told me not to bother with shakes or bars and didn't give me any protein targets. ) When I told him that about what I'd read on here about protein etc, he told me just to try and eat a healthy, balanced diet. He said that I would find that protein would be easier to eat than carbs and that I would just naturally eat the right amount. I thought I'd better try it his way initially (so that, when it didn't work, I could tell him and do it the US way instead) but so far, so good! I'm pleased with my weight loss and I feel positively healthy (much more so than pre sleeve - who'd have thought it?!?!?) I'm a teacher too so can relate to your food issues at work (I have a 20 mins morning break and a 35mins lunch break, so try and get something in during those, plus water, then I get something when I get home. It's working ok so far (although once winter hits, it may become more challenging.)

Not sure if any of the above helps but hope you're feeling happier soon x x

[Ann2]

When someone wonders "How am I doing?" they're probably just wondering how others are doing so they can compare their experience. Our tickers don't offer that many apples to apples comparisons, since patients were on different pre-op diets for varying lengths of time to lose weight and/or to shrink their livers--and some of us were on NO pre-op diets.

So, like Charlie, I'll throw my data up on the screen. (You'll have to click on the image below to be able to actually read it.)

Weight Loss, 111 Days.JPG

I've had 3 weight loss phases:

* a 9-week, 1,200 calorie (more or less) diet I voluntarily did (lost 11 pounds)

* a 14-day pre-op diet required by surgeon (lost 8 pounds)

* 34 days post-op, including a second operation to remove my gallbladder (have lost 14 pounds)

I take two things from all my stats:

1. In 111 days I've lost 33 pounds, which is just a hair under 0.3 pounds per day. I think that's FUCKING GREAT! (Sorry for cussing, but that's how I really feel.)

2. And during all three phases, my weight loss has been steady ... but ONLY IF you look at the straight trend lines and not at the daily weigh-ins.

Those are the two major points I heard sraebaer making and the message that I endorsed.

I will admit that now that I'm on the sleeved side I'm more committed to the process and the outcome than I was before my surgeon actually removed 80-85% of my stomach. It's a little like that old joke about bacon and eggs for breakfast: "The chicken is involved, but the pig is committed."

I also realize that I chose to lose a little more weight pre-op than some people did, so it doesn't shock me that I'm losing slower post-op than folks who (as was their right) chose to enjoy food to the max until shortly before (or right up to) their surgery dates.

I hope my own graph / data will help anyone who wonders or fears about whether they're losing fast enough. And, grown women -- don't even TRY to compare yourselves to men who will always lose faster than us. (Our advantage in life is that when the nurse asks us what our pain level is on a scale of 1 to 10, we will ALWAYS say 4, and men will ALWAYS say 10.)

[kellyswann0609]

I'm one of those people that get frustrated about the weight not coming off fast enough But most of us have been overweight our whole lives and to think that we had to go though surgery to lose weight and still have doubts it won't work it does get frustrating. We come here to vent to get mad because our family and friends might not understand what we are going through and they might say things like why did you get it done. So if we can 't complain to them and we can vent or complain here then why even have a site for this. I know that this wasn't going to be easy and that it will take time but I have reasons for doubts that is why my therapist said I would benefit from this surgery because I know that failure is an option which I will not fail and if I can't come on this board and voice my doubts or frustrations looking for some support from fellow sleeves then I will not be apart of this site. The newcomers that come on here read these to get hope and courage to do what we have done and when they see people not supporting each other it makes them even more confused.

[sraebaer]

I didn't say slow losers eat a gallon of ice cream. I said if you are following the rules (as opposed to eating a gallon of ice cream), you WILL lose weight. I am not fat shaming anyone, as I have been fat for most of my life. But you're right, maybe it is time for me to move on.

[Ann2]

But you're right, maybe it is time for me to move on.

Most of the vets on WLS forums say they eventually quit posting because they get tired of answering the same old posts over and over and listening to newbies whine. And I totally get that.

But I really, really, really hope you don't pack it up. I love your posts. All of them.

[DebDeb]

Please don't move on Sraebaer! You'd be sorely missed and you've much to give

[Blondena Merritt]

I have been coming on here to read up on as many posts as I can. I know that I will be available to anyone after I have my sleeve to answer questions that pertain to me and my surgery and weight loss. I read the good and the bad and find that it makes my journey a lot less scary than if I had no where to go to ask questions and get answers. I am totally aware that everyone is different and that we will all have different journeys but if I can say one thing it is this: I am going to be a "loser" and I am willing to take the good posts and the bad posts. Life is a journey and I want to be around for the long haul good or bad. I know that sometimes seeing the same questions asked can be a nuisance but this is supposed to be a support site and we all need a little support once in a while. Thank you to everyone who posts and answers posted questions because I am doing this without the support team that usually goes along with this surgery. I cannot afford to have it done here in Canada because of the expense so I am going to Tijuana. I have saved up for this "life changing" surgery and I hope to continue to ask questions and eventually be part of the people who answer them honestly and without prejudice. Just my two cents worth.