Life

[Terri7]

I am moving toward this procedure. I don't want to be this weight any longer. I have done the diets. I have done the working out. It has all been short lived. Two or Three years later, finding me on a incline and difficult to stop it. Family disposition to obesity doesn't help. To add to genetic pre-disposition, competing with a hectic lifestyle, raising children, and trying to provide as a single mother body weight becomes a back seat to surviving does not help either. Eating right. There have been times when all I could afford to provide was the ramen noodles, rice and dark pieces of chicken quarters make sure ends meet. It's a difficult situation when you look at gym memberships meaning the difference between paying the light bill and going without water as well and the gas money to get to the gym because you have to make sure you have gas to get to work until your next pay check. Finally getting a half decent job to get a terrible boss and feel that at any moment you will be without a job. I know that this goes way beyond what anyone would be seeking in a profile, however, these are my feelings at the moment that I wish to share. The fact that it is online give me the ability to share openly without judgement. I don't have that empathetic ear. That best friend. I haven't had that ever in life. I guess I got lost along the way. Lonely because of life situations. I have made the best of the hand that I have been dealt. I look at this as being a new beginning for me. I have a renewed self awareness. I have surrounded myself with good people. I feel that I have finally seen how unconditional love should be expressed between families. My heart is heavy. I have been researching the gastric sleeve intensely for the past year and a half, loosely for more than 2 years. This a decision that has not come lightly. It has and is the financing portion that is the problem. I might finally have a solution. Never-the-less, it is time.

[Ann2]

Welcome!

And I will offer an equally candid response to your very transparent, honest first post. To be successful on this journey you have GOT to learn how to put your needs and yourself before all others.

Caveat: I really seldom make hardline posts like this, but you sound to me like you are looking down the barrel of "If not now, when?!"

I'm not saying you should shirk your obvious responsibilities to your children. But you have to find a way to care for yourself as much, nay more, than you do everyone else you are responsible for. You have got to now take full responsibility for your own self care.

It's a toughie. But without making that a priority and learning how to do that you will be right back where you started very soon.

It will take creativity and discipline on your part. But I bet you have those qualities. It's time to harness those in service to yourself and to love yourself as you love your children.

Because you are worth loving. And respecting.

Very, very best wishes to you!

Ann

[Terri7]

Ann2,

You are so right. I have always been the person that was strong for everyone else. Now it is time for me to be strong for myself.

[Ann2]

Amen, Terri!

And love yourself, too. We are so worthy of our own love.

(Gee, I really don't usually post to a newbie like this -- but something about your post really struck me hard.)

[Terri7]

Thank you,

Maybe you can feel the heartache through my words. Loving me has at times been a challenge because of the different situation that I have endured in life. I have brought myself into a better realization of my self worth in the past two years. Understanding more about being true to yourself.

[Leslieann]

Dear Terri~
I really can't say it any better than Ann did. I just want you to know you can do this! You sound so strong but need a shoulder to lean on. Well, we're here for you!!

Keep going on the journey about you....don't stop!
Leslie

[amelia]

Dear Terri....
Everyone has a story...and unfortunately for overweight people..that story is seldom a good one. I also was a single mom....and fully understand the 'romain noodles'!! It was not till I was 55 that I hit the 'wall' of realizing I MEANT ENOUGH TO ME that I needed to get something done. There comes a time especially for a single mom....that your life has to take priority! If not, then how can you be there for your kids?
I have been on this site for going on 4yrs now. There are a multitude of people from all walks of life and that have lived every kind of hell there is to go thru! They are honest, non-judgemental, caring and supportive people that you can say anything to. I used them as a resource for information months before my surgery...then afterwards not only as a resource but a shoulder to lean on because I also had no support forthcoming from friends or family.
I wish you good luck. Money is a problem...but where there is a will....there is a way! Even if it takes a little while to get there...the journey is well worth it! Stick in there.

[jaimaroo]

You made the first step! And for that....you deserve a pat on the back.
Why wouldn't you deserve to live the best life possible? For yourself and your family?
I believe that if you want it....it will happen.
Feel free to reach out to any of us because we have been there.
Good luck to you!

[Christie13]

Hoping you are able to find the means to afford your surgery. Doing so means being around for your children for a very long time. Good luck and welcome Terri!