Do you tell people that you are getting/got weight loss surgery?

[SleeveSteve]

I'm one week away from my sleeve surgery and the only people that know are my family. I told my work I was having surgery on a hiatal hernia. I'm a little embarrassed to make it public knowledge. Many of my friends live in other states and haven't seen me at the size I am now. I was just wondering what other's thoughts and experiences have been on this topic. Thanks!

[cloud1103]

I only told two people at work. I didnt want all the stares and questions. I actually wish i wouldnt have told them

[star242]

I don't lie. You may want to reconsider the standing of those people in your life who can't deal with something you do to improve your health. I'm planning on living longer and happier without them and my fat.

[star242]

When you lose the weight they will stare anyway. Not your problem, they apparently have issues, such a jealousy being the usual main culprit.

[Dee Leshuz]

I only told my family (they were very opposed, that sucked) and a few friends. Nobody else needs to know and if people stare I've lost weight, no biggie.

[aclabombard13]

I only told the people closest to me. I think that eventually I will tell people what I've had done, but for now I chose not to deal with/worry about their criticism and judgements. People are very opinionated about weight loss surgery. Two years ago I was scheduled for the lap bad and didn't keep it a secret from anyone. I can't even tell you how many people felt it was there place to put their two-cents in. My A$$H0%E of a brother-in-law even verbally attacked me over it. Needless to say, I backed out and didn't have it done. I let other peoples' opinions influence me. I guess in a way, it was a blessing in disguise, because I am sooooo glad I didn't get the band. My Dr. didn't offer the sleeve at that time and I am so glad I have the sleeve instead. But this time, I chose to keep it on a need to know basis. So many people think of WLS as the easy way out... but it's not easy, we still have to do the work like anyone else. I didn't want my efforts minimized by others' thoughts about WLS. I don't think I am lying to anyone, they ask what I am doing, I tell them eating small portions of a low calorie, low carb, low fat, high protein diet and exercising at the gym 3-4 times a week and that my diet is being supervised by my physician. ALL of this is TRUE!!! And the supervised by my physician part usually wards off any additional questions or concerns. It's a personal choice whether or not you'd like to tell people, but you are in no way obligated to tell them. If a co-worker was having trouble conceiving a child and had to undergo medical procedures to assist with conception, I wouldn't feel like it was any of my business... it's a personal matter. So why is it anyone's business if I had to undergo a medical procedure to assist with weight loss? I will never figure out why people think it's their place to know everything/ comment on other people's weight. Whatever... I did this for me, not them! Good luck

[aboutime4me]

I made my decision with just my husband knowing initially as he was the one who told me about a woman from his work that had the surgery. After I was going through the testing process prior to insurance approval I told my secretary and boss at work since they needed to know. I was not ashamed nor was I going to hide the fact, especially if there were complications after the fact. I told my sister and her husband on a trip back to Bflo. and not my dad because he is 90 yrs old and really wouldn't understand. I told the rest of my husband's family before surgery and then a week before I told everyone at work, on a one on one basis personally. Some were shocked because I hid my 100 lbs well but they were all pretty supportive.

Since the surgery I've had great support from my family and co-workers and yes, some look a bit skeptical I think but they don't say much. That's ok by me. I had the self confidence going into it and never the shame. This is nothing to be ashamed of. The sleeve is a TOOL like any other that I needed and am using. I answer to no one except God as to how I've taken care of my body.

This life is a constant learning and growing process. If I can help others along the way being public about my sleeve, that's part of the reason I'm on this earth. In the last 2 months, two different people at work have spoken to me about the sleeve and that they were thinking of getting the surgery too. You never know who you can touch in a positive way.

Good luck with your surgery and your journey to a healthier and happier life for many more years to come.

[WorkInProgress]

I've basically told everyone. It's hard to hide it when you drop weight so fast. Since I had my gall bladder out at the same time (which was one of the main reasons I went to a bariatric surgeon), so when they say "wow, you look great what are you doing?" My reply is usually "I had surgery because my gall bladder was really making me sick in January and at the same time I had a procedure done on my stomach that fixed a hiedal hernia." Then they say, "did you have gastric bypass?" and I say, "no I had a different procedure." Ususally the conversation ends there but if it continues I tell them the whole nine yards. Best decision of my life... not embarrassed about it at all but I don't feel like screaming it from the roof tops. And if you feel like if you tell them and you fail...they will feel bad about you.... DON'T worry about that! This is forever ... and if three years from now you put some weight back on... it isn't a failure because what you have had done is permanent and you have to look at it only as a temporary setback not as a failure. The success after this surgery comes from maintaining the weight not from losing it. We will forever struggle with the maintenance and they dont' have surgeries for that. So remember this is just the beginning! But don't worry about what others will say or think.... you are brave for doing this for yourself... you are strong for doing this for yourself... perhaps to save your life! You are already on top of the world taking charge of your health! You have everything to be proud of! Good Luck!

[tangle]

The way I look at it, it's personal. Do I share my personal business with my co-workers? No, not normally, so why would I start now? My kids, parents, and boyfriend knows, but I figure if people ask how I am losing weight, I will probably just tell them that I am on really restrictive diet. That is the truth, and I really don't feel obligated to tell them anything more. Later on, if I change my mind, I can always tell people, but at the beginning, I don't want the whispering and stares to be because I had WLS.

[pack89]

I have only told my family, and my folks and my in-laws. I haven't really told anyone else, not sure how many they have told though. For me, I didn't want the embarrassment of telling someone that I am fat enough to qualify for surgery. Yes, they can see how fat I am, but they don't need to know numbers. This is a personal thing/problem for most of us, and since us being overweight is out there for all to see, people think they can say whatever comments pop into their tiny little minds. People will say things to an overweight person that they would NEVER say to someone who has let's say, has cancer, or some other similar illness. People can be so cruel, I figure why feed the fire. They haven't lived my life and have no idea what I've been through to get me where I am now.

How will I feel after I've lost weight? Hard to tell, and I will decide then. If another over-weight person asks what I did (am doing), I will be happy to share as they will understand. Anyone else? NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS!!

[VeryLargeBob]

I put this blurb on my Facebook wall: "On Monday night, I'll be flying to San Diego. I'm having my stomach stapled. After almost 10 years of gaining and losing the same 50 pounds over and over, it's time for something different. Surgery is Tuesday."

The response was overwhelmingly positive. I'm glad I did it.

[Dee Leshuz]

Regarding dropping weight fast: "I'm on a strictly portion controlled high protein diet that only includes limited amounts of complex carbs. It was hard at first but now I'm used to eating much smaller amounts."

There ya go!

When I've gone to a health club and women were curious about the surgery (they could see my stomach, I had to tell them I was on limited activity) I've been honest, when going to different departments of my HMO outside the bariatric dept. one Administrative Assistant was curious and I told her...these were people who may have wanted the info for themselves and were not judgmental. Everyone else can wonder!

[scgal21]

I only told my hubby and son. I have some very negative family members (unfortunately you can't pick your relatives!) I've lost relatively slow, but it shows and I get a lot of compliments. I just smile and say thank you. I don't owe an explanation to anyone, as I'm doing this for ME and my health. My son's future in-laws asked me about my weight loss and I was happy to share with them, since they both would benefit from this surgery. I am very selective who I tell and I don't consider it lieing. Good luck!!

[Feather]

I can see both sides because it is no one else's business, but for me personally, I don't want to have to keep up with who I have told and not told and I don't really care who knows anyway. When it comes right down to it, nobody is going to lose sleep over how much I weigh, now or in the future. There will always be cattiness and petty jealousy. I think in most cases, honesty is the best policy.

It is sad that WLS has such a negative stigma, no one close to me was thrilled that I was having it! (Just the opposite!) And, the two girls who I party with the most, who are string beans esp. compared to me, yet they are SO up in arms that I could possibly weigh less than them in the future that they are both on diets already. Silly girls! Oh, except we aren't really girls - we are in our mid-50's and they still act like teens when it comes to body image! Really sad!

[ACE]

Personally I told everyone and I still do I keep my WORST pic of me in my wallet and show them when they don't believe me. I feel its best to be honest for me but that is all your choice but dont worry about what people will think because it only matters what you think